You are currently browsing posts tagged with YouTube Is a Sordid Place
So my latest troll down YouTube lane began with a link from my friend, Doug. It led to a video (removed from YouTube today) posted by an American gent in his fifties (and bearing an uncanny likeness to Captain Kangaroo). In it, he wears a custom hachimaki and dances wackily in front of the screen projection of a music video from the J-pop band Perfume. The man, who goes by the YouTube handle Perfume444, gleefully professes his longstanding love for Perfume–particularly his favorite member of the trio, A-Chan, as he makes kissing motions to her video lips. He smiles the biggest grin I’ve seen on a human being in weeks. The piece ends with a scrolling caption: “I really, really, really LOVE Perfume!!!”
I thought, instantly: DISGRASIAN. A snap judgment, yes, but I doubt I was the only one who would have made it.
But I needed to see more. So I clicked through to his YouTube channel. Quickly, I saw that Frank (Perfume444) had something to say for himself in the “About Me” section:
PERFUME 444 CHANNEL IS NOT ABOUT PEOPLE SEEING ME…ITS ABOUT ME THANKING PERFUME FOR ALL THAT THEY HAVE DONE !!!
I have been to Japan in 2003 and 2005.. I play Drums so did 2 small tours in Japan. I LOVE JAPAN !!!! I miss it so much. The Japanese People are so kind and wonderful. I really feel like my soul is Japanese. About Perfume… I got into Perfume in early 2006. I was looking for Japan stuff on youtube, all kinds of music from Japan and I found Perfume. The song Akihabalove was the first one I heard. I fell in love with that song and the girls. I watched the beehive cam on youtube and watched them grow up. So my love for them is like a father daughter love. Not sex because they were so young at the time. Even now I still see them as big kids, NOT sex objects. Anyway…about the Music… I was hooked, It was so different then anything I heard before. my all time favorite song is Seventh heaven…It all ways makes me cry. I also love Secret Secret , Foundation, computer city, Macaroni, Edge , ” jenny in a bad mood ” wonder 2, Polyrhythm,Baby cruising love , Vitamin Drop, yes Its heard to pick just one song. A-Chan is my favorite. If I was 20 yrs old I would want to marry her. But Im not ! Im 55 yrs old. But perfume music makes me feel happy and young I wish I could find some one like A-Chan. She is the most beautiful person I have ever seen. her heart and sole are heaven ! The person that marries her will be the luckiest person on earth.
Well, shit, the words were sweet as perfume. AND LITTERED WITH RED FLAGS. (Quick, another snap judgment: Frank is a full-on Nippon perv who clearly thinks of the 21 and 22-year-old members of Perfume as sex objects. I mean, hello, read the “About Me” excerpt!)
But first, more proof. More videos. Needed to see more creepy, pervy, proofy videos. But my eyes slid to the right and glimpsed this user comment:
Continue reading He Really, Really, Really Loves Perfume
Filed under: 4Chan, A-Chan, Captain Kangaroo, Creepy Old Dudes, Frank Evins, Happy Birthday Kashiyuka Video, Internet Memes, J-Pop, Japan, Kashiyuka, Nippon, Nocchi, Perfume, Perfume444, Pervs, Snap Judgments, Squirrel Glider, Wormholes, WTF?, YouTube, YouTube Is a Sordid Place
This passenger-documented video of two ladies getting hostile (like, downright violent) over an apparent seat-hogging situation on San Francisco’s MUNI bus in Chinatown is starting to make the Internet rounds. In response, YouTube commenters have quickly taken sides and naturally erupted into a hot, ignorant racial debate (One woman is black; One is Asian–prepare for the worst).
I know that in this era of absofuckinlutetrainwreck fascination it’s hard not to slip right into cage fighting voyeur mode–grab the popcorn, pick a favorite, start cheering–but frankly, this video’s chaos and its assaults just made me sad. Fine, we’re animals, and we physically duke it out–but what’s the natural order displayed here? What is achieved? What is the point?
I’m not taking sides on this one, and I don’t care who is “right” (That is assuming that someone can actually be considered “right” after fist-fighting near schoolchildren and innocents in tight quarters on a commuter bus).
Frankly, the only person really worth cheering for is the woman who appears at roughly 1:29 of the video, who adamantly and physically commands those involved to “STOP IT”–instead of simply standing idly by–horrified but fascinated–like everyone else.
and by that we mean pervs is talking about “magibon,” the latest YouTube sensasian. The wide-eyed, Japanese Margaret Keane doll doesn’t say anything in her videos, leaving viewers to speculate about their subtext. Me personally? I think girlfriend looks like she just vomited in her mouth and is doing her damnedest to swallow it:
UPDATE: Ahh. Now we know the real reason behind that tight-lipped smile.
There are a few videos going around on the internets that are so foul, YouTubers are posting their own reactions to them and getting a lot of notice. One of the original videos is 2 Girls 1 Cup, which is a porno involving shit-eating (and you know how I feel about that), and the other one is called BME Pain Olympics (I can’t in good conscience link to them, but if you’re a sick freak, google them). The latter is what this guy is watching:
The first time I saw this reaction vid, I thought, wow this guy is a big pussy. Is he fer serious with the “O” face?
Then I found a BME Pain Olympics link. BME Pain Olympics is about a minute and a half long and shows closeup footage of several guys chopping off their balls and dicks with knives and hatchets. I got about 30 seconds into it before I passed out.
Now I want to nominate the guy in the reaction video for Amazian of the Week.
Thanks to our friend Adam, we were exposed today to a new YouTube creature. Meet “myricegirl,” a rabid Patriots fan who raps about football and describes herself as similar to:
hooters, wino on the street, pole dancer, strip tease, harley davidson gang, New England clam chowder, the Patriots wins another superbowl, Tom Brady owns Peyton Manning. Red Sox nation, senseless sexy rambling. A legend in my own mind , hot mama dream chick, show me the money.
Want more? Check out the video she made before the Pats kicked my ‘Boys’ teeth in:
Random thoughts I had after watching this:
Thanks Adam…I think!