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BIRTHDAY CELEBRASIAN! Scotty Nguyen

October 29th, 2009 | 2 comments | Posted by Diana

Happy 47th birthday to Scotty Nguyen!

Poker Playa

Nguyen is one of those dudes that my parents would never associate with publicly, because he drinks and smokes and curses and does drugs and has lost his fortune over and over again as a direct result of his vices.

But deep down, I know they love him. After all, he’s Vietnamese, and he’s such a consistent winner. Any time a Nguyen is winning in Vegas, my mom is happy.

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Filed under: Asians Love Gambling, Birthdays, Disappointing My Parents, Everybody Loves a Winner, Fortunes, Las Vegas, Nguyens Rule, Poker, Professional Poker Players, Scotty Nguyen, Secret Fascinasian, Vices

Disgrasian Dictionary

MALAPROPASIAN –: Asian who uses sucky speech, or sucky speech used by Asians.
DISGRASIANMOBILES –: The Honda Element and the Toyota Scion; souped-up Acuras; a brand spankin’-new Infiniti.
CHINYSTERIA –: The alarmist fear that China is our new enemy and wants to poison our food, eat our dogs, take over the country and force us all to speak Ching-Chong.
ANTI-ASIAN –: n. An Asian who’s aging well. adj. Delaying or lessening the effects of aging by about 10 years, especially on the skin: an anti-asian cream.
MISTASIAN IDENTITY –: Mistaking one of us for another; a result of believing that we all look alike.