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DISGWITTER OF THE WEAK! Hailey Glassman
Hailey Glassman, Jon Gosselin’s jilted ex, tweeted a photo yesterday–obviously phony–of the “stubby” penis she shared with Kate Gosselin and a few other mediocre chicks. (Warning: DO NOT click the picture link if you throw up easily. Or if you’re at work.)
Let me first just say that as an admirer of fine penises, I am deeply offended by this photo.
And then I will add to that statement that CALLING YOUR FORMER RIDE “NASTY” SIMPLY SHOWS THAT YOU ARE WILLING TO SETTLE AND SMOOSH YOUR MOIST ORIFICES ON A SAD, HIDEOUS DICK. Such a statement shames you far more than the owner of said penis–he didn’t have a choice.
Augh, what a wicked game Glassman is playing. It’s a contest in which nobody wins. Especially not me. I feel like I need to take a shower and watch some good porn to wash this sad image away. Or borrow my friend’s copy of Guys Gone Wild. Or my sister’s old Playgirls.
Jeez, did I ever really think that Jon Gosselin was the biggest fame whore of this bunch?
[via ONTD]
[THR: Hailey Glassman Posts Alleged Jon Gosselin Penis Photo on Twitter]
Filed under: 15 Minutes of Fame, Airing Dirty Laundry, DISGWITTER, Famewhore Twitterers, Hailey Glassman, Hideous Dicks, Horrific Images, Jon Gosselin, Jon Gosselin's "Stubby" Penis, Kate Gosselin, Magic Weiner, Mediocre Chicks, Shameful Behavior, Shameful Sex Acts, Small Penis Jokes, Small Penises, Trash Talking, Tweets, Twitter
DISGWITTER OF THE WEAK! Lindsay Lohan
How can one celebutard–who knows full well how closely her words are parsed–commit two Twit faux pas in one week?
She actually DID go India. Just not when the raids happened.
What we’re referring to is handing off her blackberry to a friend who apparently shouted out himself in no uncertain terms: Continue reading DISGWITTER OF THE WEAK! Lindsay Lohan
Filed under: Annoying Things Celebrities Do, BBC, Blackberry, Celebrity Twitter, Celebutards, Friends Suck, Human Trafficking, India, N word, Stupid Things Celebrities Say, Trivializasian, Tweets, Twitter
Red Cliff Giveaway!!! Follow Us And Prosper
John Woo’s new film, Red Cliff, is now available on VOD, Amazon and XBOX Live and will open in theaters starting November 18, 2009. Red Cliff is film #3 in Magnet Releasing’s Six Shooter Film Series 2, and looks so awesome.
View the trailer here:
We are partnering with Magnet for a contest to offer a sweet prize package that includes: a full size RED CLIFF poster signed by John Woo (!!!) and the Magnet/Magnolia DVDs EXILED, CHOCOLATE and DYNAMITE WARRIOR.
You’d be stupid not to want this. And entering the contest is easy!
Follow @disgrasian on Twitter and post a tweet with the hashtag #redcliffdisgrasian. If a friend suggested that you enter the contest, include their @handle, and they’ll be entered too.
All entries will be collected on Friday, November 13 at 12pm PST, and entered into a hat. Intern Jasmine will then pick the winner out of the hat on Friday, November 13 at 12:30pm PST, after which we’ll post the winner here and on Twitter!
Sorry guys, but entrants must live in the U.S.
GOOD LUCK!
Filed under: #redcliffdisgrasian, Autographed Posters, Contests, DVDs, Everybody Loves a Winner, Followers, Giveaway, Intern Jasmine, John Woo, Magnet, Magnolia, Prizes Are Awesome, Red Cliff, Tweet, Tweets, Twitter, Winner, Winning
DISGWITTER OF THE WEAK! UCLA’s Randall Carroll
In honor of our site redesign, we present a new, semi-regular feature on dumbassery we’re calling “DISGWITTER of the Weak.” Disgwitter, as in the stupid Tweets people who should know better end up posting anyway. Our first victim perpetrator? UCLA freshman football player, Randall Carroll.
Over the weekend, wide receiver Carroll got busted for bitching on Twitter about his offensive coordinator, Coach Norm Chow, to a top high school recruit. It was reported by the LA Times that Carroll, who was heavily recruited himself, used a “racial epithet” to describe Chow. The Times reposted this edited version of Carroll’s Tweet (after his account was quickly deleted):
“man oregon, stanford and cal should have been easy wins ,, but [expletive] thys [racial slur] norm chow dnt be trustin us ,, so it is what it is.”
We kinda naturally assumed that the slur Carroll, who is black, directed at Chow, who is of Chinese descent, was “chink.”
Well, not exactly.
Continue reading DISGWITTER OF THE WEAK! UCLA’s Randall Carroll
Filed under: African-Americans, Chinese-Americans, College Football, DISGWITTER, Media Hype, Norm Chow, Overblown Stories, Racial Epithets, Racial Slurs, Randall Carroll, Tweets, Twitter, UCLA Football
Too Much Twittering Turns You into an Unfeeling Douchebag
Scientists at USC have found that too much Twittering and exposure to streaming news bulletins and information on social networking platforms inures people to pain and suffering.
“If things are happening too fast, you may not ever fully experience emotions about other people’s psychological states and that would have implications for your morality,” said researcher Mary Helen Immordino-Yang.
In other words, Twitter turns you into a self-centered d-bag. Considering the popularity of celebrity blowhards like Shaq, Ashton Kutcher, and Tila Tequila on Twitter, the science is probably sound.
But doesn’t this also seem like the digital age’s version of “Heavy Metal Records Make You Kill Yourself,” and won’t it drive more kids to Twitter who are looking for a way to give the finger to Mom and Dad? Like, “Give me Tweeting, or give me death”? Boy is that a depressing thought.
Unless those kids sign up for Twitter and follow us. Then, you know, it’s all good, said self-centered d-bags Jen and Diana.
Filed under: Ashton Kutcher Twitter, Celebrity Twitterers, Shaq Twitter, Social Networking, Tila Tequila Twitter, Tweets, Twitter, Twitter Is The New Black, Twitter Teenage Rebellion
Twila Twequila
Tila Tequila Twitters. A lot. She joined less than two weeks ago and has already posted over 500 updates and has 67,000+ followers at last count. She claims not to have a ghost Twitterer microblogging for her, but she also claimed to be bisexual just in time for–tada!–her bisexual dating show on MTV, so make of that what you will.
That said, Tila’s Twitter feed is her most interesting work to date. Here are the top ten things I’ve learned from “Twila”:
- She has a crush on David Lynch.
- She takes Ambien/Lunesta to sleep, and when she runs out of pills, Nyquil.
- She’s really pissed at Rihanna for not being a “better role model” and for “partying.”
- She’s been studying quantum physics “for many years.”
- She’s a conspiracy theorist.
- The “biggest celebrity douchebag asshole” she’s ever met is Jared Leto, whom she calls “a self-absorbed cunt.”
- She is BTF (Best Twitter Friends) with Meghan McCain (@McCainBlogette).
- She is always LOL.
- Her idols are “Kathryn of Aragon, Anne Boleyn, Queen Elizabeth, Joan of Arc and Tupac Shakur.”
- The only person she really hates in the world is Nadya Suleman, aka Octomom, because of the way that “hoebag…smiles when paparazzi’s are swarming her.”
See what I mean? Pretty entertaining stuff. Who knows if a word of it is true, except for the part about Jared Leto being a cunt. That I would never dispute.
Filed under: Celebrity Twitterers, Celebutards, David Lynch, Jared Leto, Meghan McCain, Microblogging, Quantum Physics, Rihanna, Tila Tequila Free Speech, Tila Tequila Twitter, Tweets, Twitter
