You are currently browsing posts tagged with Tiger Woods Crash

Tiger Woods Mans Up By Wearing Man-Jewelry

March 22nd, 2010 | 3 comments | Posted by Jen

For the first time since the Nov. 27 car accident that outed him as a cheater, Tiger Woods answered questions from the media in two separate interviews with the Golf Channel and ESPN.

Both interviews were billed as Tiger’s first since Nov. 27, and both seemed as carefully scripted as his Feb. 19 press conference. To each media outlet, Tiger declined to discuss what really happened on Nov. 27 when he cracked up his Escalade in the middle of the night, saying everything was already “in the police report” and anything beyond that was a “private” matter. When the Golf Channel’s Kelly Tilghman asked Tiger how he crashed his car, the golfer did nothing to improve the rep of Asian drivers everywhere by saying, rather obliquely:

I wasn’t going very fast, but unfortunately, I hit a few things.

Tiger did make one VERY BIG personal revelation over the weekend, however.

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We Get It Already, Blasians Can’t Drive Escalades

December 2nd, 2009 | 8 comments | Posted by Diana

As Gawker aptly pointed out yesterday, nearly every hack comedian in America managed a take on this setup: “Blasian Tiger Woods crashes his Escalade.”

Ha.



There are many versions, but the joke goes something like this:

Tiger Woods crashed his Escalade yesterday!
Well you know, he’s Black and Asian [pause for yuks].
And of course… the Black part of him bought the Cadillac [insert ghetto grin] and the Asian part of him was driving [insert buck teef]!

Click here for the sampler flight of punchlines.

Surprisingly, though, not one comedian seemed to find a way to make the “joke” funny. ZzZZZzzZzzZZZzZzzzzzZzzzz.

[via Gawker]

Thanks, Jasmine and Colin!

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Tiger Woods Wants You To Step Off. Will You?

November 30th, 2009 | 2 comments | Posted by Diana

Tiger Woods’s domestic fiasco is undoubtedly the most exciting squabble of the holiday season so far! For those who missed it, the haiku wrap up is:

He maybe cheated
Elin his wife was so mad
Car crash and scandal

But if you need more details, TMZ has predictably posted the full play-by-play. They will continue to uncover every ugly detail, we’re sure!

Tiger and Elin: Privacy, Please

Tiger and Elin: Privacy, Please


Tiger released a statement on his website, kindly asking for the privacy “he deserves” while staying mum:

“As you all know, I had a single-car accident earlier this week, and sustained some injuries. I have some cuts, bruising and right now I’m pretty sore.

This situation is my fault, and it’s obviously embarrassing to my family and me. I’m human and I’m not perfect. I will certainly make sure this doesn’t happen again.

This is a private matter and I want to keep it that way. Although I understand there is curiosity, the many false, unfounded and malicious rumors that are currently circulating about my family and me are irresponsible.

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