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It’s August. It’s hot. And by golly, we’re kinda tired from bitchily bitching out all of the year’s most disgraceful sonsofbitches. That shit wears on a lady, yo!
And so, dear friends, we’re taking a one-month hating break. Call it a vacasian, call us lazian, but for the month of August you will not be reading politics and pop culture highlights through our foul-mouthed, yellow-tinted lenses of shame and disgrace. Instead, in our daily posts we’ll be sharing some stuff we actually like, and introducing y’all to a few of our pals.
And then we’re gonna hit the beach!
But fear not, haters! Come September, when all the kids are going back to school, we’ll be back to blog, shaming people with youthful fervor once more.
Diana and Jen
Look, guys! It’s a photo from the Tokyo premiere of Sex and the City 2!
Oh YOU. Don’t hate. (HA! Look who’s talking!)
I’m going to say this once even though I know that many of you won’t believe me, many more will scoff, and even more will ridicule me for it:
THE MOVIE IS NOT THAT BAD.
I saw it last Thursday, fully convinced it was going to be a stinker–likely for the same reasons as you: Your best friend walked out of the theater grousing about what a drop-kick to feminism this flick is (by the way, should we really be looking to movies that contain bedazzled logos for feminist benchmarks?). The 16% Rotten Tomatoes rating is simply… pathetic. The “I Am Woman” karaoke scene is worse than it sounds (in fact, every musical number is worth a cringe). Someone told you about the burqa escape scene (sadly, true) and multiple appearances/mentions of camels/magic carpets (also true).
Or you saw the first movie, which was downright abysmal.
But by golly, I’ll stand behind my statement. SATC2 is fun, familiar, and a worthwhile way to spend a few evening hours, especially for a die-hard fan that’s willing to watch the PG-macheted, syndicated reruns on TBS every night while ordering dinner (or owns an SJP fragrance). That, my friends, is who I am. Jen is like, my full-on bestie, and even she has only just begun to understand the extend of my SATC nerd-dom. I’m like a Trekkie, but for Sex (or as Jen’s best mate calls us, “sluts!”)
So if you are like me, you love the HBO series unconditionally–despite Miranda Continue reading Sex And The City 2: Shameful Or Spectacular?
Filed under: Aidan Shaw, Alexandra Fong, Amazian Jr., Burqas, Carrie Bradshaw, HBO, Neuroses, Nonsense, Not So Bad, Romps, Sarah Jessica Parker, Sex and The City, Sex and the City 2, Sex and the City Movie Sequel, SJP Fragrances, Sluts, Taking a Hating Break, Trekkies
You may or may not already know that May is Asian-Pacific American Heritage Month. It’s a month meant to celebrate Asians and Pacific Islanders in the United States, all of us! We at DISGRASIAN like to look at this time as an opportunity to take a collective hating break, and to really take note of the wacky and diverse population of AAPIs in this country–AMAZIANS and DISGRASIANS alike! Love or hate, we’re all brothers and sisters.
And fairy godfathers.
Or beautiful family friends that you wish would adopt you away from your Hardass Asian Parents.
Or crazy aunts that you wish would stop attending family parties. Continue reading AMAZIAN OF THE WEEK! The Month Of May (Asian-Pacific American Heritage Month)
Filed under: Angry Asian Man, Asian Americans, Asian Americans United, Asian-Pacific American Heritage Month, Bai Ling, Kal Penn, May, Norman Mineta, Phil Yu, President Barack Obama, Taking a Hating Break, Tamlyn Tomita, Tila Tequila, We Are Family
Okay, so we woke up this morning and felt like the same jerks we’ve always been.
But we just saw the new Ebony cover (which features Kimora, her hot man Djimon, and their ridonkulously cute baby boy) and all we could think to say was:
Filed under: Djimon Honsou, Ebony Magazine, Ebony Magazine Cover, Going Soft, Hating on Kimora is Our Pastime, Kenzo Honsou, Kimora and Djimon Baby Kenzo, Kimora Lee, Losing Our Touch, Taking a Hating Break
Ladies and Gents, it’s been quite a year: Dubya left the building, Laura and Euna came back to us safely, Miley got goofy, Nadya Suleman lips got tabloid time, Kanye lost his hand, the Gosselins aired every last Garanimal of their dirty laundry, and Tiger Woods fell off his hookerbitch-lovin’ pedestal.
DISGRASIAN also got a makeover.
Frankly, we’re pooped. So we’re taking the rest of the year off for a little shaming break.
But before we go, we thought we’d mention our plans for celebrasian–which include a bit of donasian to Hyphen Magazine!
Alright, maybe we’re a little biased because they’ve spent some of their non-profit funds photographing us this year. But we also believe in Hyphen–what they do and how they do it is an inspirasian to us all.
Filed under: 2009, Donasians, Dubya, Euna Lee, Hyphen Cover, Hyphen Magazine, Jon Gosselin, Kanye West, Kate Gosselin, Laura Ling, Miley Cyrus Chink Eye, Nadya Suleman, President Barack Obama, See you in 2010, Taking a Hating Break, The Gosselins, Tiger Woods
*Err… Intern Jasmine just reminded us that ‘Eastwick’ was cancelled last month. Um… let’s hope you get one of those fun new leopard-print Snuggies, instead!
But goddamn, Grace Park on the cover of the new issue of Maxim makes all of that nonsense look good. I CAN’T HATE. I CAN’T HATE. (Did I just write that??!?)
Birthdays are nice, because sometimes they force us to say something pleasant to or about people we’re not usually all that nice to.
This week, that person is Jessica Simpson, who we’ve historically been, y’know, less-than-forgiving to (Note to Ms. Simpson below the pic):
HELLO Jessica Simpson, and happy birthday! You’re 29 and
it shows wow, you’ve never looked better it’s awesome to still be able to say you’re in your twenties and unmarried and loving it, right? We’d like to wish you a great year and, for your sake, the ability to find some kernel of real talent within yourself so that you might actually become somewhat relevant in the public eye again. Party hard, lady! Maybe you can keep the birthday cake in your own mouth this time (see above for memories)!
The good news is that this is potentially the cutest fucking thing I have ever seen.
Which means we at DISGRASIAN™ may be finished.
Goddamn you, Jasmine. Goddamn you! (Oh wait!! I’ve still got it…!)
Filed under: Adorable-ness, Baby Pandas In A Crib? Seriously?, Icy Hearts, Intern Jasmine, Jessica Simpson, LA Lakers, Pandas Are Sickeningly Cute, Taking a Hating Break, Tila Tequila, Unfamiliar Warm Feelings
Pro-woman scholar (we try not to use the “f” word, as in f*minist, here at DISGRASIAN) Naomi Wolf penned an essay for this month’s issue of Harper’s Bazaar, stating her case for why Angelina Jolie’s life is not only intriguing but admirable (and, um, pro-woman), her sphere of influence so very big and round.
Immediately after the article surfaced, scattered voices across the Interwebz snorted and scoffed. Jezebel, whose writers were shamed by Wolf after making asses of themselves on Lizz Winstead’s TV show, responded, predictably, very flatly. But perhaps that’s because Angie doesn’t inebriate as much as she did in her twenties, and only appears to fuck one person at the moment (how conventional!).
However, Double XX also found Wolf’s commentary absurd. The Washington Post‘s Liz Kelly found that the evaluation was downright anti-f*minist. And the celebrity blogs seemed to all share one snarky, repulsed, collective sniff.
So here I am, sitting quietly behind my laptop at DISGRASIAN HQ, wondering why I seem to be the only person that didn’t have that negative reaction. Am I some kind of sucker? Am I, like all those average girls, desperately in lust with Jolie’s pillow lips? And so ignorant of the world’s goings-on that I think she’s also some kind of brilliant saint (Wow, what’s Darfur!?)? Am I just soooo wishing that I was playing house with Brad Pitt? Do I secretly want to be really skinny with veiny alien forearms and big ol’ lady cans?
I don’t have a problem with Angie. I like her. I have seen her present some twisted, brilliant performances (Hello, Girl Interrupted!) and some incredibly fun ones (Gear-shifting in Gone in Sixty Seconds? Bending bullets in Wanted? Come on!). I appreciate the fact that she’s gone from Hollywood bebe to angry tween to escapist user to beautiful freak to self-taught scholar to loving mom, all seemingly without a life coach. I feel like she’s gone through some fucked-up shit, and she’s found the very best way to hold it together–which is to focus (even to the point of vomit) on improving the world she lives in.
Listen: from my experience, I don’t expect a lot from actors (or celebrities in general), save for they be really crazy, entirely full of themselves, convinced that they’re funny, dripping with bad house-decorating taste, and mostly intolerable to be around. If they do anything beyond that, like READ A BOOK, or do U.N. Ambassador work, I’m duly impressed.
Okay, okay. Let’s be real. Look at these cute fuckin’ kids:
Today, Chan can enjoy the experience of us being gentle and nice to him! Pretty neat, huh? If he would just stop all that wretched clowning, it could happen a helluva lot more often.
As you may already know, I’m a big fan of the new Britney album, and I’m not sorry about it. Not one bit. In fact, I’m rocking out to “Piece of Me,” right this very minute.”
So it’s no surprise that I would have a soft spot in my icy little heart for any artist so enchanted by the crazywoman’s new songs that they would perform a cover–even a band with otherwise questionable habits, like citing My Chemical Romance as an influence.
Royal Pirates, a duo of cute Korean guys that apparently operate out of both SoCal and SeoulKo, is that kind of band–a nü-emo, sentimental-thrash sort.
But, hell, after listening to their exquisite cover of Spears’s track, “Circus,” they can make all of the crappy emo-rock-core-pop they want, and I won’t hate. All is forgiven.