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Mitt Romney Is a Silly Name
The great white hope for Conservatives in Election ’08, Mitt Romney, announced today that he has suspended his campaign for the Republican Party Presidensial nominasian. We at DISGRASIAN are sad to see him go–BFHFHAHAHAA–we’d been rooting for him all alo–PFFFTFTFTFTFHHF–and we…HAHAHAHAAHA.
Sorry, but Mitt Romney for President? Just the thought of it always gave us tummy giggles. Or wait, maybe those were vomit shivers. Oh well, fare thee well, Romney!
Filed under: Buh Bye, Conservatards, Mitt Romey, Presidential Candidates, Quitting, Silly Names, Stepping Down, The 2008 Presidential Election
And Then There Were Two
Clearly worried about forever being known as “Mister Third Place” (or as we described to Rudy Giuliani yesterday, “First Loser to the First Loser”), John Edwards officially announced his exit from the Presidential Race today.
Of course we’re sad to see him and his perfectly-coifed hair step down. We truly respect his furious fight for the angry middle class, and hate to see any strong-willed Democrat hang up his coat. But it really gave us the sad and uncomfy tingles watching him try to squeak into the dialogues of the last handful of debates, only to be ignored like a homely, boobless teenage girl. Hey, nobody needs to feel that left out, not this long after summer camp.
Edwards ran an admirable campaign, and we applaud him for trying. Although, let’s be honest, we’re Asian! We think quitters are LOOOOOOOOOOSERS!!!
Filed under: And then there were two, Buh Bye, Coifs, Democrats, John Edwards, Losers, Presidential Candidates, Quitting, Stepping Down, The 2008 Presidential Election
