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Feel kinda weird about how AZNs are ‘winning’ everything. Used to think that they were sort of a ‘novelty race’ who were just trying to look kute, but I think I was focusing one the wrong ones that didn’t actually represent the majority of the AZN population [via Gwen Stefani's AZNs].
And inspires more disaffected dreck like this:
Still not satire. Still not funny. But definitely foolish.
Weren’t born with slanty-eyes but really really want them? Have no fear, slanties are here!
Based on “ancient Inuit eyewear,” slanties are sure to make you stand out among your round-eyed kinfolk! Although…
…they may just have the adverse effect and make you look like yet another useless hipster-cheesedick-stylebiter-turd-poseur-waste-of-space-and-humanity-and-barstools-at-watering-holes-I-used-to-like-to-drink-at in skinny jeans.
And the world needs more of those, really it does.
Thanks, Josh and Jasmine! Don’t be sad, Elizabeth!