DISGRASIAN™

Japan Revolutionizes The Girl Group

Watch your back, K-pop!

Although Japan’s been eating your dust for years in the girl group game, it’s recently produced quite possibly the most unforgettable pop sensation this world has ever seen.

Give it up for HRP-4C!

Unforgettable, in every way, but mostly in the skin-crawling, vertigo-inducing, scarier-than-clowns, make-it-stop way.

The upshot? She’d make for a terrific Halloween costume, especially if you hate trick-or-treaters, children in general, or, really, all people.

[via The Awl]

Filed under: Artificial Intelligence, Creepy Robots, Girl Groups, Halloween Costumes, HRP-4C, HRP-4C Robot, J-Pop, Japan, K-Pop, Robots, Scarier Than Clowns, Scary Shit, Small Wonders, Technological Advances, Things That Make Our Skin Crawl

DISGRASIAN OF THE WEAK! The Bachmann Tea Party Signs

HuffPo has culled together the best-spelled worst of the worst protest signs from Michele Bachmann’s Tea Party yesterday, which was designed to “scare members of Congress” into voting against healthcare reform.

Our top three:

Continue reading DISGRASIAN OF THE WEAK! The Bachmann Tea Party Signs

Filed under: American Idiots, Congress, Conservatards, Dubious Comparisons, Genocide, Health Care Bill Public Option, Healthcare, Healthcare Reform, Idiots, Jackholes, Mao Zedong, Michele Bachmann, Protests, Scary Shit, Sharing The Country, Tea Parties, The Holocaust, This is Bullshit, What The Hell Are These People Talking About?

DISGRASIAN OF THE WEAK! National Defence Commission of North Korea

Like Father, Like Son?

What can we say? The ‘Eternal President’s‘ Dynasty does not play well with others.

There’s the longstanding secrecy about the health of North Korea’s de facto leading dickhead, Kim Jong-Il. The naming of a relatively unknown figure, Kim’s youngest son–Kim Jong-Un, as his successor. A teeny-tiny (What nuclear timetable??) nuclear missile test last month. Recent threats against South Korean ships in the North’s territorial waters. Aggressively dangling the carrot of nuclear war, over and over again, with the United States and the world at large.

Oh, and of course: detaining journalists Laura Ling and Euna Lee for crossing the North Korean border, convicting them after a 5-day secret trial of illegally entering North Korean territory, sentencing them to 12 years of hard labor without so much as letting the world see their face, and releasing a report detailing Ling and Lee’s admission of crimes–as well as their intent to produce a smear campaign against North Korea.

And now, there is the emerging threat via Japan that North Korea could potentially be launching a long-range missile at Hawaii on our Independence Day. Don’t be scared; we’re pretty sure we’re prepared to deal.

That doesn’t change the fact that the North Korean government has succeeded in making their country one of the scariest, fuck-all, let-it-all-burn, motherfucking places in the world. They don’t give a shit, and they want this planet to know it.

Is that DISGRASIAN? We sure as fucking hell think so.

[CNN: Gates - U.S. ready for North Korea missile]
[Liberate Laura & Euna Now]

Source

Filed under: Euna Lee, Fucked Up Shit, Hawaii, Kim Jong Il Is a Dick, Laura Ling, Liberate Laura and Euna, Making Threats, North Korea, North Korea Missile Test, Nuclear Warfare, Nukes, Scary Shit

The Japanese Toilet Paper Novella–Scary as Sh*t?

Let me ask you, when you hear the words “horror experience in the toilet,” what comes to mind? The public restrooms at Port Authority? The morning after a Sichuanese or Southern Thai food binge? A snake taking a bite out of your penis while you’re on the crapper?

“Horror experience in the toilet” is actually how Drop, the new novella of Koji Suzuki, author of Ringu, is being marketed. The whole story is printed on toilet paper, takes place in a public restroom, and can be read in a few minutes. Because what better place is there to get the shit scared out of you than the turlet, right?

Source
Thanks, Jasmine!

Filed under: Clean Toilets, Horror Movies, Japanese Toilet Paper Novel, Japanese Toilets, Koji Suzuki, Public Restrooms, Ringu, Scary Shit, The Ring, Weird Japanese Behavior

Kim Ok: Star of the Next Hot Asian Horror Franchise

Meet Kim Ok. Described as Kim Jong Il’s “consort” (journalist-speak for Blowjob Queen), Kim Ok has been Il-lin’s secretary since the 80′s. Very little is known about Kim Ok, except that, since Kim Jong Il’s stroke, she’s been signing official documents on his behalf. She apparently was hand-picked by the Dear Leader’s late wife Ko Yong Hi when Ko was dying of cancer to replace her as first lady. She’s in her 40′s and a pianist. And, uh, she doesn’t photograph all that well (pictured right, in the only public snap of her).

She also looks like she could climb out of your TV, float on your ceiling, and kill you with her “wet look.” All she needs is a little more stringy hair combed over her face and a janky walk.

(from the Shutter remake) Look out, Pacey! Kim Ok’s comin’ to getcha!!!

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Filed under: Asian Horror Movies, Blowjob Queens, Consorts, Ju-On, Kim Jong Il, Kim Jong Il Stroke, Kim Ok, North Korea, Nukes, Ringu, Scary Shit, Shutter, The Grudge, The Wet Look

I Am Panda

This just in from Cannes:

“Zombie Pandas Overrun Film Festival: Jack Black Now Feared to Be ‘One of Them’”

Source
Thanks, Jasmine!

Filed under: Cannes, Demented-Looking Creatures, Don't Get Me Started on Kung Fu Panda, Jack Black, Nightmares, Pandas, Please Don't Eat Me, Scary Shit, Zombies

Survival of the Asian

Reports swirled through the world today as eleven North Chinese miners emerged from a collapsed mine after nearly a week inside. To the shock of many, one of the miners recalled how the group fed on dirty mine water, paper, orange peels, and a half-boiled leather belt to survive.

Incredible!!! I’m blown away by this incredible tale of survival and proud of the hardiness of our peeps. Take that, Bear Grylls!

It would be remiss of me, however, to omit the fact that if the mine owner had actually reported the accident when it happened–instead of three days later (for fear of being fined or shut down)–these poor miners might not have resorted to dinging on leather goods TO SURVIVE.

Source

Filed under: Accidents, Bear Grylls, China We Have A Problem, Danger, Hiding the Truth, Holy Shit, Miners, Scary Shit, Surviving