You are currently browsing posts tagged with Reality TV Contestants

Watch The “Chinese Adele” Sing “Someone Like You”

August 16th, 2012 | 4 comments | Posted by Jen

I don’t what it is about Adele’s voice, but it bugs. I can’t stand it. It’s so overwrought and what’s the word? Singerly. I know, I know, that’s not even a word. I just don’t want to hear it. Shut up shut up shut up, Adele. Fast forward to the next song before hives break out on my leg.

That said, it’s kind of crazy to hear a simulacrum of Adele’s voice come out of 19 year-old Zheng Hong, a contestant on the Chinese version of “The Voice.”

Things I love about this video?

  1. That big, confident voice coming out of a seemingly quiet, unassuming girl.
  2. The crying judge.
  3. The crying judge.
  4. Alas, again, the crying judge.

[via Know Your Meme]

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DISGRASIAN OF THE WEAK! Kenneth Tong And The Size Zero In The Room

January 14th, 2011 | 1 comment | Posted by jasmine

Dear Mr. Kenneth Tong:

Earlier this week, I started reading stories about you and this idea of “managed anorexia,” a Twitter campaign you launched then claimed was a hoax, but only, it seems, after a journalist mentioned the possibility of legal action against you because of it.

I sent a few links about this story to Jen and Diana, the editors of this blog. As their intern, it’s part of my job to look for stories they may want to write about on the site.

I figured you were a shoo-in for “DISGRASIAN OF THE WEAK,” a weekly dishonor given to someone or something that has done something so foul and terrible that we may all be worse off because of it. Something so bad it’s almost worth not writing about but for the fact that we have to warn others about the bullshit you’ve perpetrated.

Also, I figured that having DOTW on your resume would be a natural fit for someone whose only previous claim to fame was as a contestant on “Big Brother UK”.

They asked if I could write a response to you and to your story. They asked me to do this because I first alerted them to it, and because I seemed pretty well invested in taking you down.

I also wonder if they asked me to do this because I’m fat.

So, Mr. Kenneth Tong, I want to thank you.

Thank you for causing even a fraction of a millisecond of a doubt in my mind about the reason behind Jen and Diana asking me to write this story.

Thank you for taking it upon yourself to use Twitter to bully and harass the women who were unfortunate enough to read your posts.

Thank you for showing the world the truth of the hate that you have for fat people, for women, for people with eating disorders, for the people who love them, and for pretty much every decent person on earth.

Thank you for using anorexia, an eating disorder, and exploiting it for the sake of an experiment “to go from nowhere to be a globally recognized figure within a week harnessing the power of the internet and specifically Twitter.” I’m sure that people suffering from anorexia and other eating disorders were happy they could lend a hand in the effort to promote you.

Thank you for using the interviews you’ve given to the press since you began this awful game (because it’s just a game to you, isn’t it?) to promote yourself instead of clearing up any assertions you made about anorexia, or to offer real apologizes to anyone you may have offended or harmed.

Thank you for re-tweeting every single negative message you received on Twitter in response to “managed anorexia”, because it shows you really only care about yourself.

Thank you for showing me that when I thought I’d heard every insult and every bad word you could hurl at a fat person, you came up with even more.

Thank you for making me think about you, and how much I hate what you have to say, when really I would have been much better off focusing on more important things like who I think is going to win big at The Golden Globes on Sunday, or cleaning my bathroom.

Thank you for making me fearful of posting a picture of myself on-line, of writing this post, of showing people who I am, because now all I can think of is being judged or, even worse, being ignored, because I am fat.

Yours,

Jasmine (aka, Fatso, Fatty Fat Fat, Fat Bitch, and so on and so forth)

[Evening Standard: A size zero pill, reality TV celebrity Kenneth Tong and a perfect storm on Twitter]
[Kenneth Tong on Twitter]

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BABEWATCH: The Biggest Loser Finalist Ada Wong

December 14th, 2010 | 4 comments | Posted by Diana


Name: Ada Wong

Age: 27

Occupation: Tech Project Coordinator

Hails from: Bay Area

Why She’s A Babe: Wong is one of four contestants seeking the ultimate prize in The Biggest Loser finale tonight, and although her scores don’t have her sitting safe on top, the love of viewers may garner her a spot on the winners’ podium. But going the distance in this big competition isn’t all that makes her babealicious–nor her pretty face, which you see in the photo above.

Wong is by far one of the most fascinating, enduring, and–by all TV evidence–legit women ever to face an NBC reality gauntlet. Amidst her quest for lasting and meaningful weight loss, viewers have been treated to a strong work ethic, gentle heart, and something else we aren’t quite used to: honesty.  Few people would be willing to access their most vulnerable spots–a lifelong weight struggle, the tragic childhood death of a brother, the burden of her parents’ blame for the loss, her father’s emotional deafness–in front of an often-cruel, millions-large American audience. But she did, and those of us Continue reading BABEWATCH: The Biggest Loser Finalist Ada Wong

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Caption This: Cheryl Burke And Tom DeLay On Dancing With The Stars

October 27th, 2009 | 3 comments | Posted by Jen

cheryl burke and tom delay

[photo via HuffPo]

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The Balloon Boy Saga: A Lesson In Bad Acting

October 19th, 2009 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

Well, we said Balloon Boy’s father, Richard Heene, was a bad actor, but little did we know that he actually went to school for that shit. During a press conference Sunday, when Larimer County Sheriff Jim Alderden officially declared the Balloon Boy incident a hoax, Alderden also mentioned that Richard and his wife Mayumi met at a Hollywood acting school. (Various sources confirm it was the Lee Strasberg Theatre and Film Institute in West Hollywood.)


With the Heenes now potentially facing felony criminal charges, the lesson here: BAD ACTING IS A CRIME after all.

But it still might pay. Because if, in fact, Richard and Mayumi “did this for the show,” to sell their family dysfunction as reality TV as people are saying–they already approached TLC a few months ago, but the Jon & Kate network passed–the Heenes may have a leg up on the competition, because everyone knows that bad acting is also the backbone of reality TV.

Just ask these clowns:


[CNN: Authorities: 'Balloon boy' incident was a hoax]

Source

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DISGRASIAN OF THE WEAK! The Balloon Boy Family

October 16th, 2009 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

Lessons learned from yesterday’s Balloon Boy incident…


1) It only took one person to start the rumor–and the ensuing media frenzy we all used as an excuse to blow off work Thursday–that 6 year-old Falcon Heene was up in that shiny, oversized-birthday balloon. And that person was Falcon’s older brother, 9 year-old Bradford.

LESSON LEARNED: We should never believe anything that comes out of children’s mouths.

2) When the Heene family was later interviewed by Wolf Blitzer on Larry King Live, little Falcon dropped a bombshell that suggested the day’s events had been nothing but a carefully-planned hoax: “We did this for the show.”



LESSON LEARNED: We should believe everything that comes out of children’s mouths.

3) On Friday morning, when the Heene family was gently pressed by a kindly Meredith Vieira on The Today Show about Falcon’s bombshell statement, the 6 year-old vomited not once, but twice (around the 6:28 mark).

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

LESSON LEARNED: Vomiting on cue, unlike crying on cue, is a majorly underrated talent.

4)
LESSON LEARNED: Richard Heene is not as talented an actor as his puking-on-cue son, Falcon.

5) Our favorite blog patroness, Arianna Huffington, went on MSNBC’s The Ed Show Thursday afternoon to talk about this little thing called Afghanistan, but the interview was subsequently hijacked by the subject of Falcon Heene, who had, at that point, been found very much alive.

When Arianna, who later deemed Balloon Boy a “non-story,” asked host Ed Schultz, “Now that the little boy has been found, why are we still talking about it?” Schultz responded, somewhat scoldingly, that Balloon Boy was “a good lesson to parents across the country to make sure you always know where your kids are.”

Uh, right.

LESSON LEARNED: On second thought, there are no lessons to be learned from Balloon Boy.

Sigh. Well, we may have learned nothing whatsoever from Balloon Boy…


…but we still think Falcon Heene would make a seriously awesome Halloween costume.

Think about it. Run with the possibilities. Nay, fly! Fly on little Falcon Heene’s clipped wings!

LESSON LEARNED: When life hands you a Balloon Boy lemon, make Balloon Boy lemonade.

Thanks, Jasmine!

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Da Plane! Da Plane! Fantasy Island Gets A Reality Makeover

October 5th, 2009 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

One of my favorite shows from childhood, Fantasy Island, is being remade…into reality TV. Variety reported today that the new version will center around 12 contestants competing to become the “real-life Mr. or Ms. Roarke,” by making the dreams of guests arriving on a weekly basis come true. Survivor creator Mark Burnett and Sony Pictures TV are behind the show.

Will the reality version of Fantasy Island deal with dark themes as the original did, like rape, suicide, and murder? Or will it be all about leis, suntans, and umbrella drinks?

More importantly, will there be a side(kick) competition to see who gets to be the real-life Mr. or Ms. Tattoo? Could be fun. Could be a hot mess. Let’s just wait and see.

[Variety: Sony, Burnett to visit 'Fantasy Island']

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The Murder Of A Young Asian Woman You’ve Never Heard Of

September 30th, 2009 | 1 comment | Posted by Jen

A young Asian woman was killed almost three weeks ago in September, and still no one seems to know who she was. I’m not, of course, talking about Yale graduate student Annie Le.

Her name was Lee, one letter removed from “Le,” Felicia Lee, to be exact. Professionally, the Singapore-born, Australia-raised 31 year-old went by Felicia Tang, and in addition to having bit parts in Rush Hour 2 and The Fast and the Furious, she had appeared on Playboy TV and in adult films like Hotel Decadence and Asian Fever. In 2003, she was in an online erotic video with Tila Tequila where they fondled each other in a pool. In some reports, she has been described as a “porn star,” but her career in adult entertainment does not appear to have been that extensive. Most recently, it was reported that Lee was working towards getting her real estate license.

She was found in the apartment she shared with her boyfriend, Brian Randone, on September 11 in Monrovia, CA, east of LA, beaten and choked, after Randone had called 911 to report that she wasn’t breathing. Randone, who has been described as a “self-styled preacher,” a “Christian mime,” a “former reality TV contestant” and a “pageant contestant”–having appeared on the 2000 Fox show The Sexiest Bachelor in America–was arrested within hours and charged four days later with killing and “torturing” Lee. The torture charges stemmed from the severity of Lee’s injuries, which were described as “gruesome” by the Superior Court Judge who arraigned Randone Tuesday, and from evidence that Lee had suffered dozens of these injuries in the 24 hours before she died.

As much as the details of Lee’s life and death, true or inflated, would seem sensational enough (porn, Hollywood, torture, a pretty victim) for widespread media coverage, unlike Annie Le’s murder, Lee’s has largely failed to capture the public’s imagination. In the week following her murder, only a scattering of newspapers and media outlets had actually bothered to report it. The San Gabriel Valley Tribune wrote a story about it on September 15 (Monrovia is in the SGV). The San Jose Mercury News posted one on the 16th. The LA Times Local section penned a blog post on the 17th. The closest thing to a national media outlet to report on Lee’s death in that first week was CBS News’ Crimesider blog, described as “The True Crime Destination from the Producers of 48 Hours Mystery,” which published a story on September 18 entitled “The Preacher and the Porn Star, the Tragic Story of Felicia Tang Lee (Photos).” Within that same timeframe, several Chinese-language newspapers also picked up the story.

To understand why Felicia Lee’s murder has had less media “value” than Annie Le’s, I re-read Joan Didion’s “Sentimental Journeys,” from her 1992 collection Ask Henry, in which she examined the way the media covers crime vis-a-vis the Central Park Jogger case. In the essay, Didion writes that the “preferred tabloid (crime) victim” is someone who’s “presented as fate’s random choice,” “attended an expensive school” and/or “been employed in a glamour industry.” Annie Le–high school valedictorian, Yale graduate student, fiancee of her college sweetheart–certainly fit that bill. Felicia Lee–topless model, adult film actress, girlfriend to the man who allegedly murdered her, whom she met around the Las Vegas MGM Grand swimming pool in April–did not.

Felicia Lee, in the only non-made-up photo I could find of her on the internet, gardening with a friend

To that point, it was a full two weeks after Lee’s murder, on September 25, before the Associated Press finally got around to reporting it. By that time, about 600 articles could be found online about her death. Contrast that with the tens of thousands of stories about Annie Le, whose body was found two days after Lee’s.

Shortly thereafter, the blogosphere got around to reporting it, too. But only to an extent. The blog posts that have emerged haven’t focused on Lee so much as they have on her boyfriend and alleged killer, Randone. The fact that he was on a reality TV show–albeit 9 years ago–has given the story legs. The fact that another reality TV contestant, Ryan Jenkins, killed his lover recently, has made the story run. And since two murders with perceived similar circumstances–however tenuous–were committed within a month of one another, the story’s suddenly become “news,” in the way that Didion described it, in that it now offers “however erroneously, a story, a lesson, a high concept.”

Brian Randone in court Tuesday

On Sunday, September 27, 16 days after Lee’s murder, Gawker spelled out exactly what that story, lesson, and high concept was in the post, “Another Reality TV Contestant Accused of Murder, But There’s a Twist!”:

“So, the lesson here: America’s popular culture, not the four horsemen, will spark the apocalypse. Also, if you meet someone who’s been on a reality star, run, because they will kill you.”

Let’s re-phrase. So, the lesson here: the story of Felicia Lee’s murder isn’t about Felicia Lee at all. It doesn’t matter if she was a “porn star” or “a human being, a daughter, a sister, a friend to many who continue to love and honor her,” as the Lee family described her in a statement to the LA Times. (My god, to have to remind the world that your murdered loved one was a “human being.”) She isn’t, as it turns out, the story, the lesson, or the high concept. What an odd thing it is, to have to be cut out of your own narrative, in order for it to be told.

[Crimesider: The Preacher and the Porn Star, the Tragic Story of Felicia Tang Lee]
[LA Times: 'She did not deserve to be beaten … she was a nice gal and she didn’t deserve it']
[Gawker: Another Reality TV Contestant Accused of Murder, But There's a Twist!]

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America’s Next Top Model Cycle 13: A Shit Season?

September 9th, 2009 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

America’s Next Top Model Cycle 13, aka The Short Girls season, premieres tonight. You’d think that in a season in which none of the contestants stand over 5’7″, the show would be crawling with eensy-beensy Asian chicks, but Cycle 13 has, like so many other cycles before it, only one token, and her name is Jennifer An.

She’s 23, hails from Philly, and her special qualities–judging by her interview below–include doing musical theater badly and pooping a lot:

 

Is this a sign of things to come? I can’t say for sure, but maybe we’d all be better off spending our Wednesday nights doing something more productive than watching Cycle 13, like cleaning our toilets, which is admittedly filthy work but probably still less shitty.

[via Zap2it]

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BABEWATCH: Alex Wong

June 9th, 2009 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

Name: Alex Wong

Hails from: Canada

Occupation: Miami City Ballet Principal Soloist and Would-Be So You Think You Can Dance Contestant

Why He’s a Babe: Last week, the top 20 SYTYCD finalists were announced, and Alex, who was considered one of the top contestants, would have been among them, but the Miami City Ballet refused to let him out of his contract–boo!–which made Alex cry, because, to paraphrase Don Henley, all he wants to is dance. And that kind of commitment to his craft is beautiful.

More importantly…look at those abs. Lick at those abs. What’s really a crying shame is that America doesn’t get to see more of that.

Click here to watch Alex’s dance solo during Vegas Week that made Debbie “You Want Fame? Well Fame Costs. And Right Here Is Where You Start Paying…in Suh-weat-tuh” Allen say, “Shut. Up.”

Click here for the SYTYCD top 20.

Source
Thanks, jRu!

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You Can Start Acting Like a Winner Now, Victor Jih

May 14th, 2009 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

Amazing Race–or Amazian Race, as I like to now call it–winner Victor Jih enjoyed his first spoils of fame this week by getting stalked by TMZ. Outside one of L.A.’s most notorious temples to sushi- and human-mediocrity, Koi.


Christ, Victor. First Mitt Romney, now Koi? What is it with your love of loser establishments? You really won me over with your impressive command of Mandarin in the last few legs of the race, but really. Buy yourself some taste with your half of the million dollars, for fuck’s sake!

[TMZ: 'Amazing Race' Winner Spends It Like He's Got It]

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SPORTS ILLUSTRASIAN: Pick Me Pick Me Pick Me, Michael Irvin

January 22nd, 2009 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

Hai. Can’t really talk right now, because I’m kinda busy getting ready for my reality TV audition. I know, I know, reality TV…yick. I’m not in it for the fame or the money, I’ll have you know, since reality TV, like crime, don’t pay. But the prize on this show–which is sort of top-secret and doesn’t have a name yet–is a spot on the 80-person, training camp roster of the DALLAS FUCKIN’ COWBOYS. In other words, dream come true.

The show will be hosted by Michael Irvin and air this spring on Spike. Here’s what they’re looking for in a contestant:

They likely will need a football background — just not too much. They also must be the right age, size and condition to handle an NFL training camp.

“We want someone who will have a real opportunity to make the team,” Irvin said. He also indicated the better the backstory, the better an applicant’s chance of making the show.

Did somebody say backstory?! I’ve got more backstory than Michael Irvin’s got furs and hooker hush money! (Let’s hope they’re not sticklers about “right age, size and condition” however.) And I can throw a perfect spiral. In the ballpark of 10 to 12 yards. Especially if it’s a Nerf. And I can punt the ball in the same range, too. Also especially if it’s a Nerf. And though I’m not great at keeping my eye on the ball, I could learn, right? That’s why they call it training camp, isn’t it?

So pick me, Michael Irvin! Pick me!

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