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Oh, Ralph Nader. It has to be said–when it takes a Fox News anchor to call you out on a racial slur, you’ve really hit rock bottom.
Time, we think, to call it.
The following has been translated courtesy of the Ebonics Translator:
In an interview dis here week, da presidential wannabe Ralph “Pimpin’” Nader stirred up static and shit by claiming Obama talks “whitey.” Nader told da Rocky Mountain News:
“He wants ta appeal ta whitey guilt. You appeal ta whitey guilt not by coming on as black iz fine, black iz powerful…”
Which led us ta wonder, what’s da difference between jivin’ whitey an’ jivin’ black?
We’s searched an’ searched da internet fo’ clues an’ finally found da ebonix translator, which wuz very helpful. It takes cracker english an’ “ebonifies” it an’ ya really see da difference. So we’s jet back an’ looked at Obama’s response ta Nader an’ realized he really do jive whitey, what the fuck sup now? If it’s dis here easy why don’ Obama jive black? He’s black right? Ya’ dig?
So we’s decided ta translate what da Democratic nominee said ta Nader in black jive so dat he could be mo’ true ta himself:
“Ralph Nader hadn’t been paying attention ta muh ma fuckin speeches, cuz all da issues dat he talked about–whether it be predatory lending, da housing foreclosure crisis…I’ve devoted multiple speeches…an don’t make me pull mah gat!
Ralph Nader iz trying ta git attention…He’s someone…whose campaign hasn’t gotten any traction. So what bettah way ta git some traction than ta make an inflammatory statement like da one dat he made? It iz what it iz. Don’t make me come ovah there bitch…”
Dere ya gots it, ye damn hood ratz. Now dat dere iz Obama jivin’ black, fo’ real. It’s dat simple, aight???