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Elizabeth Hurley “Forgets” Sari Blouse, My Ass
HuffPo reports that Elizabeth Hurley attended a black-tie event this week in London dressed in a sari but “forgot” to wear a blouse underneath.
Can you imagine this kind of senility setting in at age 44? Poor thing!
But forgetting Elizabeth’s age-defying boobage for a second, let’s do a scroll down to her feet:
Continue reading Elizabeth Hurley “Forgets” Sari Blouse, My Ass
Filed under: Annie Wilkes, Arun Nayar, Boobs, Breasts, Elizabeth Hurley, Marrying In, Racial Drag, Saris, Scary Feet, See-Through Clothes, Showing Your Breasts In Public, Tits, Weird Feet
Leave The Creepy Russian Ice Dancers Alone!
Last night, controversial Russian Ice Dancers Oksana Domnina and Maxim Shabalin revealed their toned-down Aboriginal-themed costumes during the free skate performance that brought them to a current bronze medal position.
What a difference a few leaves make
Hmm. We’re still searching for the “interesting,” “respectful” and “Southeast Asian” nuances that this team keeps referring to regarding their costumes. Surely all of that “big research” they did to keep the performance authentic paid off somewhere.
Give us a few minutes days months years. This may take awhile.
[NBC Olympics: Russian Dancers Make Slight Changes To Costumes]
Filed under: "Southeast Asian" influences? What?, 2010 Winter Olympics, Aboriginal Costumes, Always Do Your Homework, Controversy, Cultural Theft, Defiance, Ice Dancing Is Lame Beyond Words, Maxim Shabalin, Offensive Costumes, Oksana Domnina, Put Down the Glue Gun, Racial Drag, Russian Ice Dancers, the Olympics, Vancouver Olympics, Vancouver Winter Olympics, Winter Olympics
Could This Kobe Any Easier?
Yeah, Kobe, you know we don’t love you. Or like you, even.
But hot damn… sometimes you make our job SO EASY.
Continue reading Could This Kobe Any Easier?
Filed under: Bruce Lee, Couldn't Think Of A Better Way To Shame Kobe If We Tried, Embarrassing, Fugly Shoes, Kobe Bryant, Kung Fu Poses, Lame, Nike, Nike Ad, Racial Drag, Seriously?, Shaming Oneself
DISGRASIAN OF THE WEAK! America’s Next Top Model And “Portraying” Race
Tyra Banks is the Mistress of Babble. She’s usurped the word “fierce” from drag queens and publicly abused it to the point that it’s been emptied of all meaning and packs the same linguistic punch as clearing one’s throat. Her biggest contribution to the English language, “smizing,” or “smiling with your eyes,” is a made-up modeling term that’s also a paradox, something she’s defined in the past as “squinting with your eyes open” (and something that I happen to really suck at).
Her crazy talk extends beyond modeling to the “social” ideas she explores on both her talk show and America’s Next Top Model. Remember when she put on a fat suit for a day to understand what it was like to be the victim of what she called the “last form of open discrimination that’s okay”? Or when she had the Cycle 10 ANTM contestants “do” homeless, posing with real-life homeless youth, and told the models she understood what it was like to live on the streets because she (again) did it for a day on her talk show?
Continue reading DISGRASIAN OF THE WEAK! America’s Next Top Model And “Portraying” Race
Filed under: America's Next Top Model, America's Next Top Model Cycle 13, ANTM, Blackface, Essentialism Is So Fun, Paradoxes, Portraying Races, Racial Drag, Smiling With Your Eyes, Smizing, The Tyra Banks Show, Tyra Banks
Jessica Simpson On Being A Has-Bindi
Simpson Searches For Beauty
“Ken, I am like, fully having soooo much fun in India! I’m so glad that I decided to wear my Indian vest and jean shorts to tonight’s gala. Remember when we bought this vest in New Mexico? I actually am kinda loving it right now.
Anyway, how much are you feeling this country? Everyone keeps saying sorry, sorry, sorry all the time. Who was it that was telling me that I should wear sorries for special parties? I didn’t know how to look sorry, so I just wore this old vest!
OMG, we have taken sooooo many awesome (three) pictures of all of the beautiful sights ( including ourselves at totally nondescript locations like the airport) here in this strange country!! Right?? I really kinda dig the hand b-b-bling, right? Look at this! It’s like somebody… drew all over my hand! I feel like they should, like, totally do this in America, cuz it looks so good on you no matter what size you are. Just like shoes and sweatpants. But I’m not sure about this bindi thing. I think it makes me look cross-eyed. Every time I look at it in the mirror I look cross-eyed.
Continue reading Jessica Simpson On Being A Has-Bindi
Filed under: Ashlee Simpson, Bindis, Boring Peope, Gwen Stefani, Has-Beens, Idiots, India, Jessica Simpson, ken paves, Losing "It", Mom Bikinis, Racial Drag, Reality TV, Sublebrities, The Price Of Beauty
Racist Halloween Costumes…For Pets
With Halloween right around the corner, a lot has been said already about the latest crop of costumes–from the good to the bad to the offensive. An Illegal Alien costume, which was pulled from the shelves of Target and Walgreens this week after complaints from immigrant rights groups, seems to be this year’s undisputed winner in the last category.
But didja know that offensive Halloween costumes even extend to pets? Here are some of the worst:
Description: Your cutie will look vibrant and colorful in this Chinese themed dog dress! Features an adorable Asian floral print on magenta with faux thread Chinese toggles on the back and white satin trim.
Okay, who’s going to break it to the costume makers that geishas aren’t Chinese?
Continue reading Racist Halloween Costumes…For Pets
Filed under: Costumes, Geishas, Halloween, Halloween Costumes, Illegal Immigrasian, Immigrant Rights, Immigrants, People as Accessories, Pet Costumes, Pimps, Racial Drag, Racist Gear, Racist Halloween Pet Costumes
Call Her "Geisha-ca" Simpson
Jessica Simpson went to Tokyo this month to film scenes for her MTV reality show on beauty and body-image, where she roamed the streets in racial drag as a geisha:
Incidentally, during her stay, a 6.6 earthquake hit near Tokyo, and Jessica tweeted about it. (If you Google “6.6 earthquake,” the first entry you get is “Jessica Simpson tweets about 6.6 earthquake while in Japan.”)
So, let’s see…Jessica Simpson visits Tokyo as a geisha, then a 6.6 earthquake hits. Hmm…
Cause-Effect?
[via BuzzFeed]
Filed under: 6.6 Earthquake Japan, Bad Fuck Charms, Cause-Effect Relationships, Jessica Simpson, Jessica Simpson Geisha, Jinxes, MTV, Price of Beauty Show, Racial Drag, Tokyo, White Geishas
Katy Perry’s Asian?
Fact: Asians love Josh Groban.
It all goes back to Groban’s version of “You Raise Me Up.” “YRMU” is a siren song to our people–vaguely religious, anthemic, treacly, referencing nature–”mountains” and “stormy seas”–and perfect for karaoke (and by “perfect” I mean perfect for butchering, given some of its tricky high notes).
A Japanese version of it was the theme song to a 2007 anime series called Romeo x Juliet.
Filipina teen singing phenom and Oprah-favorite Charice Pempengco recorded it for her second album, My Inspiration, which was released in May of this year.
Shoot, even my parents sang it with their Chinese choir a few years ago (um, speaking of butchering).
So, I’m not saying Katy Perry, who’s been linked with Josh Groban, is Asian or anything…
But I think it’s really really weird that she stole my mama’s tattoo.
[via Gawker]
Filed under: Anthems, Charice Pempengco, Hardass Asian Parents' Music, Josh Groban, Katy Perry, Katy Perry UR So Gay, Michelle Kwan, Racial Drag, Singers, You Raise Me Up
Kung Fu Girl Riesling: It’s Yellow! And It Kicks Ass!
How much do I gotta pay you to order Charles Smith Wines’ “Kung Fu Girl Riesling” in public, with a straight face, without your genitals totally shriveling from shame?
Described by her winemakers as a Riesling that “kicks ass” and contains “delicate aromas of stone fruit, white peach, apricot, Asian pear and white spring blossoms,” Kung Fu Girl retails for a mere $12.
So, you know, I’m not going to pay you that much.
Source
Thanks, HawaiiDawg!
Filed under: Charles Smith Wines, Cheap Wine, Embarrassing, Kung Fu, Kung Fu Girl Wine, Racial Drag, Rieslings, White Wine, Wine
Paris in Dubai
At a press conference Wednesday in Dubai, Paris Hilton announced that she’s filming a new version of her reality show Paris Hilton’s My New BFF there.
Because there’s not enough effed-up shit going on in the Middle East right now. No, not really.
Filed under: Dubai, Iran, Iran Election, Middle East, Paris Hilton, Paris Hilton My New BFF Dubai, Racial Drag, United Arab Emirates
The Family That’s Awkward Together Stays Together
Have you checked out the three month-old site, Awkward Family Photos? Perhaps you’ve already submitted your own pics, like when your dad was rocking that five inch-wide polyester tie or when you had that man-perm mullet that made you look like a show poodle instead of Mario Lopez circa Saved by the Bell. Lots of funny family portraits are to be found here, including families in business together, families in racial drag, and, you know, families just looking creepy and weird for no particular reason.
There are, of course, some photos of famous families, too:
Awkward Family DicksThat’s our embellishment by the way, and not something original to the photo, although given Kim Jong Il’s awkward relationship with his Number One Son, seems plausible, doesn’t it?
FREE EUNA LEE AND LAURA LING, DICK!!!
Source
Thanks, Neal!
Filed under: Awkward Faces, Awkward Family Photos, Awkward Moments, Creepy Faces, Dicks, Euna Lee, Free Euna and Laura, Kim Jong Il, Kim Jong Il Is a Dick, Laura Ling, Racial Drag
RIP David Carradine
David Carradine, 73, who was best known for his work in the 70’s TV show Kung Fu and the Kill Bill movies, was found dead Thursday in a hotel room in Bangkok, from an apparent suicide.
Kung Fu (1972-1975) centered around Carradine’s justice-seeking character, Kwai Chang Caine, aka “Grasshopper,” a half-white, half-Chinese orphan raised by Shaolin monks. During that time–and long after in syndication–Carradine seemed to be the only Asian star on TV. That’s no joke. It was a joke, of course, that Carradine was white, but his character was kinda all Asian people had to root for, for a while.
Carradine, who had no knowledge of martial arts before the show, became a lifelong practitioner of Tai Chi and Qi Gong.
Filed under: David Carradine, Grasshopper, Kill Bill, Kung Fu TV Series, Kwai Chang Caine, Martial Arts, Qi Gong, Racial Drag, Tai Chi, Wannabes, Yellowface
