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BIRTHDAY CELEBRASIAN! Elton John

March 25th, 2010 | 4 comments | Posted by Diana

Happy birthday to honorasian Elton John, who turned 63 today!

Why Hardass Asian ladies love Elton:


* He, like all grownup Asian ladies, loves bedazzled evening outfits.

* File Under: Easy Listening

* 5 Grammy awards, an Academy Award, a Golden Globe Award and a Tony Award. (Who cares if you don’t watch the Tonys? It’s an award!)

* A distinct love for tiny dancers.

* Five important words: Was friends with Princess Diana.

* He turned those piano lessons into somethin‘!

* Guaranteed to rally for karaoke.

* He gives songs as gifts. And by jove, H.A.L.s love presents!!!

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SELF-VLOGELLASIAN: On Romantic Gift-Giving

June 19th, 2009 | 0 comments | Posted by Diana

What are Jen and Diana doing when not blogging or practicing violin and piano?

We’re Shopping Imbibing Complaining Spelunking Doing Rad Stuff vlogging.

Listen, it’s advice.

Consider us humanitariasians.

Subscribe to our YouTube channel here.

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In Preparasian for Jen’s Birthday

December 3rd, 2008 | 0 comments | Posted by Diana


Listen, guys. I’m sure you all know that Jen’s birthday is tomorrow, and that your gifts and cards are already wrapped, stamped, and sent. You’re just that kind of people!

But just in case you’ve shamefully procrastinated, I’ve included a handy-dandy gift giving guide that is no-fail! (And we all know how Asians feel about failure.) Trust me:

10. A pretty winter scarf.


9. A delicious cake from LA bakery Sweet Lady Jane, with “JANE” scratched out on the label–and replaced with “JEN.”


8. Custom GH axe


7. A hit on Jessica Simpson before Tony Romo and the Cowboys face the Steelers this weekend


6. Blood and Chocolate original print on vinyl


5. Vintage youth Dallas Cowboys starter jacket


4. Dumplings for our dumpling!

3. DDK on a plate

2. Cool laser gun to take down enemies (or Bai Lings)


1. The day off. Jen’s not writing tomorrow, biatches! Deal with it!!!

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Casuallasian Dropping Hints

February 27th, 2008 | 0 comments | Posted by Diana

Conversasian between Jen and Diana at DISGRASIAN HQ earlier today:

(Diana works tirelessly in the side office, hiding what she’s doing)

JEN: (pops her head in) Yo. Whatcha doin’?

DIANA: (wildly tosses newspapers over her work) HI!! NOTHING! HI! WHAT’S UP?!? HOW’S IT GOIN?

JEN: Dude, what are you doing?

DIANA: Nothing! Let’s talk outside in the foyer.

JEN: Are you making something??

DIANA: No. (barricades the doorway)

JEN: (pushes her way through) You are! You’re making…

(Jen lifts the newspapers to reveal a bouquet of origami flowers)

JEN: Flowers! For me?

DIANA: Yes, peach. I’m afraid you’ve ruined the surprise.

JEN: But why flowers? Is it my birthday?

DIANA: Nope. It’s our one-year DISGRASIAN anniversary. Well, it soon will be. This weekend.

JEN: You remembered!

DIANA: I did!

JEN: And here I just bought you a new Marni bag to commemorate our union.

DIANA: You didn’t! You shouldn’t have.

JEN: I did.

DIANA: I can’t believe it’s been a whole year. We’ve come so far. We’ve accomplished so much.

JEN: It’s true. Do you think any of our friends will give us presents for our anniversary?

DIANA: Like who? RJ? Ty? Jasmine? Henri? April? Erin? Benna? Slanty? Chris? Jru? Greenie? Angry? G Scott? Eliza? Your Mom and Dad? Um, for starters?

JEN: Yes, like those people. Most of them have the mailing address for DISGRASIAN HQ. And, I mean, for those who don’t, a gift certificate via email can be so chic. Only in circumstances such as this, of course.

DIANA: So chic. Wow, I really love presents.

JEN: Me too. Anyway, I’m proud of us for getting to a year. It’s been a lot of work, pain, tears, bouts of exhaustion, and sleepless nights… but so worth it!

DIANA: Me too! What more could a person want out of life besides a Volvo, their health, Marni, and a rad blog partnership?

JEN: Presents.

DIANA: Happy early anniversary, Jen.

JEN: Happy early anniversary, Diana.

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