DISGRASIAN™

Sign O’ the Times

Seen this week on McCain Blogette, Meghan McCain’s “Musings and Pop Culture on the Political Trail” blog:

Shannon Bae, filmmaker and member of Meghan’s blog “team,” in Sacramento

I really don’t care who people vote for. Okay, maybe I care a little, but what I’m mostly concerned with is that people care about who they themselves are voting for. That’s why I find the homemade sign “KOREANs 4 McCAIN” (pictured) so appalling. To put it mildly, it is a piece of dogshit. The “s” tacked on to the end of “KOREAN” suggests one of two rather dismal possibilities: 1) there is only one “Korean 4 McCain” in Sacramento, and he/she only realized after beginning to make the sign that honestly representing that reality would be soul-crushing, or 2) the signmaker is a piss-poor planner (which, frankly, is not very Asian). Either way, nothing explains why the signmaker didn’t, upon realizing his/her mistake, chuck that poster in the trash–or why there are random polka dots (or stars?) haphazardly scattered on it for “flair”–and make a bigger, badder, and more bitchin’ sign for their candidate.

Now, let’s talk about the font. It looks suspiciously like a half-hearted attempt at Chinese Take-Out script that was abandoned midway for a wholly uncompelling reason. Like, suddenly the signmaker realized that his/her frozen-then-reheated lasagna had been languishing in the microwave for twenty minutes and was perhaps now cold. Or that The Mentalist was on and Simon Baker is probably enough of a reason to watch the second episode of CBS’ panty-dropping procedural even though the first was comically awful. Or that, okay, the signmaker has finally run out of clean underwear, and the laundry simply couldn’t wait another day.

And I haven’t even begun to weigh in on the “CHINESE-AMERICANS ♡ MCCAIN” poster in the background. You may not be able to tell, but the heart between “Chinese-Americans” and “McCain” is made of glitter. It’s difficult to make that out because those sparkly bits were applied so stingily that I can only assume the person who made the sign actually hearts nothing. Because glitter = love. Glitter = joy. And perhaps most importantly, glitter = excess. And if Chinese-Americans really ♡ed John McCain and wanted to make that statement shimmer, I’m pretty sure, as both a card-carrying Chinese-American and a glitter-lover, that their poster would have looked something like this:

Of course, there’s always the possibility that these signs look like key-rap because the people who made them aren’t totally totally “4 McCain,” and their “♡s” aren’t really in this. In which case, well, that explains everything.

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Filed under: Bloggers, Chinese Take-Out Script, Glitter Is a Totally Underrated Movie, Korean-American Voters, Lame Signs, McCain Blogette, Meghan McCain, Political Signs, Poor Planning, Shannon Bae, Signage

Bright Idea, NASA

Astrohaut Akihiko Hoshide in Kibo, the Japanese Experiment Module (JEM–and no, we don’t know what that means) of the International Space Station, in June

Ruh-roh. The Japanese Kibo modules installed onto the International Space Station in March and June are running out of…lightbulbs. Wired Science reported that 9 out of the 21 fluorescents on board have burned out, a number dangerously close to half, at which time Kibo will be too dark to work in. AND, incredibly, there are no more spare bulbs on the ISS. NASA now plans to bring more lightbulbs to Kibo on its next Space Shuttle trip in November.

Looking on the bright side (yuk, yuk), just think of all the lightbulb-changing jokes that will come out of this! Cornball humor for $450 million? It’s so, so worth it!

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Filed under: Akihiko Hoshide, Astronauts, Bright Ideas, Don't Leave the Light On Baby, International Space Station, Kibo, NASA, Not the Brightest Bulb in the Box, Poor Planning, Smart Moves, Space