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Last Shot of Tila Tequila, Please

December 11th, 2007 | 0 comments | Posted by Diana

The final showdown of MTV’s red cup-fest A Shot At Love With Tila Tequila goes down next week, and blogs across America are wildly abuzz: WHICH LOVER WILL TILA CHOOSE??

Will it be…

…or…

BOBBY or DANI–man or woman–straight dude or lesbian–
either way,we can’t believe they both still care and/or don’t have
managed to escape Tila’s embrace without an onslaught of V.D.


WHO WILL IT BE? WHO WILL IT BE? WHO WILL IT BE?

Oh who are we kidding? We don’t care. Nay, we don’t give a shit.

As we’ve maintained from the beginning, Tila is a poseur, fame whore, and most importantly, a homisogynasian drive-bi. We’ve never bought her bi-curiosity, only been amazed by her ability to turn a cache of zzzZzZztitillating web cam videos of herself sharing brisk kisses with gal pals into a much-discussed multi-episode reality series. Entrepreneurial? Sure. Bisexual? Not on your life.

Sure, people may have thought we were just hating on the short little trollop, ’cause we were jealous or somethin’. That was, of course, until Page Six chimed in–albeit eight episodes too late. As they report, an inside source says Tila has a boyfriend, and the sexy sexual curiosity thing has all just been a sham all along! Wow! Shocker!

That’s funny, she didn’t seem to mention any boyfriend when she was on Tyra Banks’ talk show, gushing vaguely and unconvincingly about how she’s been sneaking around “like [in] a movie” with the winner of the show–oops, we mean, the winner of her love–since they wrapped.

It all makes us wonder if the trifecta (secret boyfriend, show winner, and the drive-bi) are all involved in A Shot At Love’s second season, which has apparently been in motion since October.

After all the excitement of this fake season, one can only hope so. Can we make just one brilliant suggestion: ORGY PARTY!!!! WE’LL BRING THE RED CUPS.


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