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SPORTS ILLUSTRASIAN: Wrestler Jimmy Wang Yang-ked

June 12th, 2008 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen


Oh, Jimmy Wang Yang. I just don’t know how to feel about you.

On the one hand, from your MySpace page, I catch glimmers of myself:

howdy im jimmy wang yang and im your boy . im half korean and white . i was born in hollywood california . i moved from cali to a little town in georgia called austell .i grew up there . im your asian redneck . i like nascar , atlanta braves , and i love pro wrasslin .

Okay, maybe minus the “wrasslin” part and your aggressive disregard for apostrophes and capitalization. The point is, man, I relate.

I also like how your WWE bio describes you as “not your stereotypical Asian” and asks this very pertinent question:

Why is he supposed to know where the nearest Chinese restaurant is, after all?

DUDE. I TOTALLY FEEL YOU. I could actually tell you where the nearest (good) Chinese restaurant is in my hometown, but that’s only because my friend Ben, who is not Chinese, has done exhaustive research on the subject and has kindly shared all of his restaurant tips with me.

On the other hand, I’m not sure why you’ve worked so hard not to be a stereotypical Asian only to become a stereotypical redneck, as witnessed by this entrance video:

Perhaps it’s all about the juxtaposition? Yellow face/Red neck? It’s a strong, cheeky selling point, I’ll give you that. For five seconds after college, I entertained the idea of moving to Nashville and becoming a country singer for, I think, the same reasons. It wasn’t because I have a particularly good voice or a knack for writing sad-sack country songs; I simply thought it would shake things up. And I have to admit, Jimmy Wang Yang, your good ol’ boy schtick is kinda hot–albeit Leather Queen-ish–although I REALLY wish you’d lose the Confederate flag. And that ridorkulous cowboy hat, too.

So. All this ruminasian leads me to one last question: Were you breaking the mold yet again when you were busted this week for violating the WWE’s drug policy and suspended for 30 days? The WWE wouldn’t say what drugs they found in your system, but I’m pretty sure I know what kind they were (performance-enhancing), in which case I should tell you, WELL DONE.

Coz the way I see it, that behavior is DEFINITELY NOT Asian.

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