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The Racist Michelle Obama Photo And Why You’re Better Off Hangin’ With Internet Pervs
Google’s taken out ads on its own site to explain why, when you do a Google Images search of “Michelle Obama,” one of the first pictures you pull up is a disgustingly racist one depicting FLOTUS as a monkey.
Here’s a screengrab of both the photo and Google’s “Offensive Search Results” ad-response:
Click on the ad, and you get this explanation for the image:
Filed under: Barack Obama, FLOTUS, Google, Google Images, Google Offensive Search Results, Michelle Obama, Michelle Obama Racist Google Images Search Results, Offensive Content, Pervs, Porn, Racist Images, SafeSearch
Michelle Obama and Carla Bruni-Sarkozy Share a Headline With Tila Tequila, Officially Making It Their Worst Day Eva
Russell Simmons lauded his Global Grind blogger Tila Tequila this week for drawing an impressive number of traffic to her recent post on declining to wear fur.
Tila’s post features a horrific, graphic video of live animals being skinned alive for the Chinese fur trade (via PETA), as well as her advice to those who love the look: “[J]ust fake it..its [sic] less expensive and you can wear your new outfit without guilt.”
If you’re wondering why someone like Tila should be weighing in at all, however vaguely, on the topic of animal cruelty, she’s got an answer for you (and yes, I find the first sentence of the statement incredibly sad):
“It may seem shocking (it certainly shocks the hell out of me) but I have offered myself as a spokesperson for a few causes that I care about and actually have been turned away! As if the fact that I’m a sex symbol in some way makes my involvement less vital than another celebrity.”
Russell certainly found Tila’s participation vital. So much so that in his very next e-breath, he noted that Michelle Obama and Carla Bruni-Sarkozy have also announced denounced fur, ultimately lumping them all into the same anti-fur tipping point.
One could call this the ultimate moment of validation for Ms. Tequila! Categorized by a hip-hop mogul as a bedfellow with world icons! Let the planet take notice!
Of course, Simmons did open those accolades with, “On twitter, my new favorite hangout…” which is so unbelievably old-man and out of touch that I actually stopped paying attention anyway.
[via ONTD]
[HuffPo: What Do Michelle Obama, Carla Bruni-Sarkozy and Tila Tequila Have in Common?]
Filed under: Carla Bruni-Sarkozy, Fucked Up Shit, Fur, Global Grind, Good Causes, Irrelevance, Michelle Obama, PETA, Russell Simmons, Skinned Alive, Strange Bedfellows, Tila Tequila, Twitter
BABEWATCH: Somaly Mam
Bar Rafaeli, Somaly Mam, and Petra Nemcova at a 2008 benefit for the Somaly Mam FoundationName: Somaly Mam
Hails from: Cambodia
Occupation: Human rights activist
Why She’s a Babe: You wouldn’t guess, just by looking at her, especially when she’s holding her own while sandwiched between two Sports Illustrated swimsuit models (above), that Somaly Mam has lived a hellish life that most of us can’t even wrap our heads around. Growing up in war-ravaged Cambodia, Somaly was sold into sex slavery at age 12. Later she wound up in a Phnom Penh brothel, where she was repeatedly beaten and raped for ten years. Three years after fleeing Cambodia with the help of an aid worker, she started the nonprofit AFESIP (Agir pour les Femmes en Situation Précaire, or Acting for Women in Distressing Circumstances) that has helped over 4,000 women escape brothels and reintegrate into society. She’s been named a CNN Hero, Glamour Woman of the Year, and in 2009, she made the TIME 100 list. You can see a snapshot of her chatting with Michelle Obama at the gala dinner here; it’s a striking photo of two strong, beautiful women locked in an intimate conversation, not to mention a toned-arm-o-rama. In other words, doing good never looked this good.
Read Marianne Pearl’s 2006 profile of Somaly Mam in Glamour here.
Filed under: Cambodian Activists, CNN Heroes Awards, Heroes, Human Rights, Human Trafficking, Michelle Obama, Sex Slavery, Somaly Mam, Time 100 2009
Prince Philip Commits His Own Violasian of Protocol
Every news outlet is talking about how Michelle Obama violated protocol Wednesday by–horrors!–touching Queen Elizabeth on the shoulder, thereby assuming familiarity and–horrors!–parity, but not enough people are talking about what the Queen’s husband, Prince Philip, said to President Obama when the two couples met for the first time.
After Obama detailed who he had met with that day, saying, “I had breakfast with the Prime Minister, I had meetings with the Chinese, the Russians, David Cameron… And I’m proud to say I did not nod off in one of the meetings,” Prince Philip dusted off the funny.
“Can you tell the difference between them?” he said, laughing.
Speaking of making an ass out of u and me, I’m assuming that Prince Philip is not talking about being able to tell the difference between the Chinese, the Russians, and the leader of the Conservative Party in England. And that Philip, who in 1986 jokingly warned British students in China, “If you stay here much longer you’ll all be slitty-eyed,” thought he was being humourous with a “u.” I’m assuming that this is where his grandson Prince Harry gets his cultural sensitivity and ideas of “protocol,” and I’m also assuming that Prince Philip is a royal doucherag.
Thanks, Livia!
Filed under: Cultural Sensitivity, Doucherags, G20 Summit, Michelle Obama, President Barack Obama, Prince Harry, Prince Philip, Protocol, Queen Elizabeth II, Royalty, Weird British Behavior
Fashion Plasian
What can we say?
Golden powerWhen you want to exude excellence, always bet on yellow. Rowr!
Filed under: Always Bet On Yellow, Excellence, Excelling, Fashion Plates, First Lady Michelle Obama, Golden Power, Impressions, Inauguration Day, Michelle Obama, Power Colors
I Swoon for Thakoon
Ladies and cross-dressing gents!
Thakoon for Target is here! Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!! (Some of you may recall that Thakoon Panichgul designed the dress Michelle Obama wore on the last night of the DNC.)
His line for Target has been out for about a week now, and the vultures have already absconded with the pretty $40 dresses (like the batik number I’m wearing at left, don’t hate…I’ll let you borrow). But there are lots of cute skirts and bikinis left, and nothing’s over $50, so hop to it.
My apologies for posing by the bamboo–I know it’s horribly cliche but it was the easiest place to take the snap. Next time, I’ll try to scoot a panda in the shot to perfect the ching-chongery of it all.
Filed under: Asian Fashion Designers, Fashism, Michelle Obama, Thakoon for Target, Thakoon Panichgul
Oh, the Holidaysians Were Just Great
Today is the President-elect’s first day back on the job at Capitol Hill, and he’s hitting the ground running by meeting with Speaker Pelosi and running headfirst into the daunting task of economic policy.
As we ourselves slide reluctantly into our first day back at work, we can’t help but wonder if Obama–between bangs of his head on the desk accompanied by the chant, “I can’t believe I’m going to have to run this broken, mangled, carcass of a country next month”–might quietly be sighing the same airy breaths of relief we all do as we return from two weeks of Holiday “celebrations.” Is he secretly thankful that now he can deal with the insurmountable mountain of work “changing America,” instead of fussing with overcommitments to parties, poor displays of unsentimental gift-giving, and mind-numbing marathons of Taboo and Guesstures with relatives?
After all, Asian lifeblood sorta runs through (or near) our future leader’s veins. Could he possibly know all-too-well the experience of a Hardass Asian Holiday dinner? If his was anything like ours, we can only imagine…
BARACK OBAMA: Merry Christmas, everybody!
MICHELLE OBAMA: Isn’t Hawaii beautiful? Look, Malia and Sasha made cotton-ball Santas for everyone!
MAYA SOETORO-NG: Aw. How lovely.
MICHELLE OBAMA: I mean, Sasha’s is a little lopsided, you know. I told her not to use the glue stick, just to use just the regular school glue, but she doesn’t listen. So it could look better, I suppose.
MAYA SOETORO-NG: I guess you’re still proud of her, though.
MICHELLE OBAMA: Sure, I guess. If only she was as good as her sister.
MAYA SOETORO-NG: Y’know, it’s funny you mention it anyway, because I wasn’t going to say anything, but I did notice that the right side could use quite a few more cotton balls. Don’t you guys use the Johnson & Johnson ones, like I suggested? How many times do I have to buy those for you guys? Barry always buys the generic ones.
MICHELLE OBAMA: He says he can’t tell the difference.
KONRAD NG: I’m with you brother, I can’t really tell the difference.
MAYA SOETORO-NG: [To Konrad] Don’t take his side! You’re my husband, be on my side.
BARACK OBAMA: Guys, I don’t know if it really matters all that m–
MAYA SOETORO-NG: So are you calling us stupid?
BARACK OBAMA: Um… no.
MAYA SOETORO-NG: Why are you trying to start fights? It’s Christmas! You just got here and already you’re starting fights.
BARACK OBAMA: I am?
MICHELLE OBAMA: Listen to your sister, honey. You’re not the “President” here.
[Michelle and Maya high-five]
BARACK OBAMA: Does the driveway need shoveling or something? I think I’m gonna go outside.
MAYA SOETORO-NG: It’s Hawaii. Are you going to shovel sand? [To Michelle] This is just like when he was little. Always saying stuff to get out of the room.
BARACK OBAMA: So… how are things with you? It’s so good to be here and just get away. I don’t even want to think about the Inauguration.
MICHELLE OBAMA: Oh boy, here we go again. Okay, Mister President. Let’s talk about you more.
BARACK OBAMA: I just mean that we’re so busy.
KONRAD NG: Yeah, we are all busy.
MAYA SOETORO-NG: Yes, Barack. We are all busy. You’re not the only one with a job, you know! I have a job, Konrad has a job, Michelle has a job, Malia has a job.
BARACK OBAMA: Malia doesn’t have a job!
MAYA SOETORO-NG: But she will! Don’t you think we should talk about her for a change?
BARACK OBAMA: Change whatever you want! FINE!
MAYA SOETORO-NG: FINE!
KONRAD NG: Does anybody want to play Rummikub?
MICHELLE OBAMA: Okay. But only if we have rum first.
BARACK OBAMA: I can’t wait to get back to work.
MAYA SOETORO-NG: Merry Christmas, everybody!
…Needless to say, we doubt the Obamas roll like we do. But boy, as you can probably tell, we are damn glad to be back at our desks.
Filed under: Back from the Dark Side, Barack Obama, Family Get-Togethers, Hardass Asian Siblings, Konrad Ng, Maya Soetoro-Ng, Michelle Obama, Strange Directions Holidays Take, The Holidays, Traumatizing Holidays
Laugh the Pain Awaysian
I am in one terrible, awful, no-good, very bad mood. Could it be because the moon is full? Did I do one rail too many last night? Is it because I’m still nursing a post-Election comedown and desperately need some methadone? Maybe it’s that I had bad pizza yesterday (which I’ve always thought was impossible). Or that I forgot my parents’ anniversary and feel like a terrible daughter. It’s the fact that I don’t have Guitar Hero World Tour at my house and am worried to death that, without practice, I’ll never master the wild new strumless solos. Or because without debate coverage, new Mad Men and Project Runway episodes, I’ve got nothing to watch on TV besides the Steelers losing to both Manning brothers, and reruns of Dog Whisperer. It definitely has something to do with the fact that that most of my guy friends are being as dramatic as chicks, and all of my chick friends (except for Jen, who is at all times elegant, amazing, and a pleasure to be around) are as crazy as chicken.
But really, when it comes down to it, the “why” I’m feeling shitty doesn’t matter. What matters is what I can possibly do about it. All I’ve been thinking, since opening my angry, slanty eyes this mornings, is what could possibly, in any way shape or form, make me laugh today and turn this crappy attitude around.
And then I saw this week’s FABULOUS Globe cover, which accuses Michelle Obama of exploding against Oprah’s, er, romantic advances:
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!
I mean, I know Barack is ahem, “pretty” and “sensitive” and “soft” and everything, but I’m pretty sure there’s, uh, no love triangle going on here.
Filed under: Bad Moods, Barack Obama, Disappointing My Parents, Funny Stuff, Just A Hunch--Pretty Sure She's Not That Into Him, Love Triangles, Michelle Obama, Misanthropy, Oprah Winfrey, Shit Friends, Tabloids
About Friggin’ Time
We learned while reading HuffPo today (surprisingly, not our own posts, but others’) that Chickaboomer just confirmed the firing of the Fox News producer responsible for the Michelle Obama “Baby Mama” chyron.
That’s cool and all, but why not boot Michelle Malkin while they’re at it? She’s little and easy to punt.
Filed under: Assholes, Baby Mamas, FOX News is a Joke, Getting The Boot, Huffington Post, Michelle Malkin, Michelle Obama
Yes She Can
Senator Obama’s speech last night at Invesco field–as it must have appeared on TV and the web–was surreal, historic, and glorious from start to finish. I watched in almost silent awe, blubbering like a baby, my flag waving furiously in my right hand… taking my eyes off of the most eloquent speaker of our time only to turn around and periodically gauge the reaction of Hillary Rodham Clinton, who was sitting about four feet behind me (So was Madeleine Albright, Gov. David Patterson, Mayor Villaraigosa… nyyyeah, I had some okay seats).
Clinton–who looked radiant, rested, and redeemed nn a chic, ivory suit–was both gracious and warm for the speech’s duration, clapping the “Yes We Can” beat longer than all of the others in her private box, listening seriously and then grinning like a beauty queen when all was said and done. The display was so warm and fuzzy that it had me singing Operation Ivy’s “Unity” in my buzzy brain all night, and imagining that everyone in the stadium was like, totally holding hands and forgiving each others’ differences and stuff.
With all of these feverish, giddy, magical feelings swirling through the stadium of 70,000 (or so) chantin’, flag-flyin’ Democrats, it suddenly seemed that everything looked more beautiful than they ever had before: the fireworks’ spectacular red glare was so very red that it made us bleed American, Stevie Wonder’s sweet voice lingered in the air as if played by a magical, silvery, lyre, and Michelle Obama gleamed like a goddess, looking her most stunning and beautifully-dressed.
I know, I know. I thought it was the wine and fervor, too. Until I found out today that our potential future first lady was dressed–not in Armani, not in Chanel–but Thakoon.
Dressed by an Asian and looking her most-ever fly? Well, that’s no surprise whatsoever.
And that’s not just the wine and fervor talking.
Source Source Source
Thanks, Jasmine!
Filed under: Asian Fashion Designers, Barack Obama's Speech at Invesco Field, Best Night Ever, FUZZY TUMMY FEELINGS, Glorious Moments, Hillary Clinton, Michelle Obama, Sartorial Choices, Thakoon, Yes We Can
Another Reason to Be a Democrat? We Dress Better.
As if you needed another reason to vote Democratic in November, here’s one more: we dress better. The first night of the DNC may have been a snooze, but its speakers’ sartorial choices made up for that somewhat, with the exception of Nancy Pelosi’s mandarin-collared, Diane Keaton-esque, creepy power suit.
Barack Obama’s sister, Maya Soetoro-Ng, rocked a wide, lipstick-red belt that was more Sex and the City than Capital City, Caroline Kennedy introduced her uncle Ted in a black cocktail number with a fashion-forward, asymmetrically jeweled neckline, and Michelle Obama, who closed out the night, eschewed the colors political wives tend to favor–red, blue, icky pastels–for a bold turquoise. Plus, the dress made her butt look hot.
Yeah, yeah, we know. We’re superficial. But the thing is, why shouldn’t women in politics be chic? Do people really take them more seriously when they borrow only from the extremely limited tricolor palette of the American flag? Or when they wear “feminine” colors that are better suited for baby nurseries? Or when they get psychotically matchy-matchy, with the headband that matches the suit that matches the nails that matches the lipstick? Do really accomplished women with Ph.D.’s (like Soetoro-Ng) or J.D.’s (like Kennedy and Obama) need to dress down like sexless matriarchs in the pantsuit version of Garanimals in order to gain public acceptance? To prove that they can lead? (Hear that, HRC?)
If Monday night was any indicator, the answer is “no.” Thank heavens! Now that’s what we call change we can believe in.
Filed under: Caroline Kennedy, Dressing Down, Fashism, Garanimals, Matchy-Matchy Nightmares, Maya Soetoro-Ng, Michelle Obama, Nancy Pelosi, Pantsuits, Political Fashion, Power Suits
If Tyra Is Michelle Obama, Then…
In the current issue of Harper’s Bazaar, there’s a full fashion editorial featuring Tyra Banks as Michelle Obama. You know, because they have so much in common. Like, they’re black. They’re both on TV a lot. And they’re both…um…let’s see…Michelle went to Princeton and Harvard Law School, while Tyra went to…Columbus University in the movie Higher Learning…and…uh…
Anyway, the preposterousness aside of, say, Tyra in a Harvard sweatshirt reading in bed while holding a pencil to her chin, arrested by her own profound thoughts, the concept is pretty clever, don’t you think? Let’s take a look at other powerful female political figures and their model doppelgangers:
1. Cindy McCain/Helmut Newton Icon Nadja Auermann
Common traits: Blond, icy-looking, vaguely dominatrix-y
2. Condoleezza Rice/18 Year-Old Rising Star Chanel Iman
3. Ruth Bader Ginsburg/Indie Darling Irina Lazareanu
4. Nancy Pelosi/Last of the Supers Christy Turlington
5. Hillary Clinton/Jessica “Marc Jacobs Named a Bag after Me” Stam
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Filed under: Barack Obama, Cindy McCain, Condoleezza Rice, Doppelgangers, Hillary Clinton, I Still Love Hillary, Michelle Obama, Models, Nancy Pelosi, Tyra Banks
