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DISGRASIAN OF THE WEAK! UC Regents

May 1st, 2009 | 0 comments | Posted by Diana

The people have spoken: Our readers almost unanimously nominated the Regents of the University of California as this week’s most disgraceful character.

When the tips started to trickle in, I wondered: what beef could everybody possibly have with my dear old friends at the University of California? I mean, I have a longstanding ugly issue with my alma mater (Um, if you must know, it’s an outstanding library debt–something to the tune of about $846.65. And, well, I’m keeping all those vintage Sartre texts and hardcover anthropology volumes. I’ll probably never pay up. I realize I’m writing this in a public space, but please, guys, don’t narc on me…).

Turns out, not one single person who wrote in was angry about their outrageous library dues. The officials just confirmed changes in the UC Admissions Policy, effective for the freshman class of 2012–eliminating some of the nasty, tough requirements (like two required SAT subject tests), and reducing the number of students guaranteed admission by the merits of great grades and test scores alone.

Though perhaps inadvertently, this policy apparently could decrease some of the numbers of Asian-Americans gaining entry into the UC System, while increasing the number of White students.

From AP:

[Those upset with the admissions policy changes] point to a UC projection that the new standards would sharply reduce Asian-American admissions while resulting in little change for blacks and Hispanics, and a big gain for white students

…Asian-Americans are the single largest ethnic group among UC’s 173,000 undergraduates. In 2008, they accounted for 40 percent at UCLA and 43 percent at UC Berkeley — the two most selective campuses in the UC system — as well as 50 percent at UC San Diego and 54 percent at UC Irvine.

A controversial situation, to say the least. But listen, irate friends, cuz here’s what it boils down to:

The changes have been made. And the bar, in a sense, has been lowered. And one result of that may in fact be that fewer test-acing, 4.7 GPA-rocking, so-fucking-used-to-excelling-that-they-apply-to-every-UC-campus-just-to-collect-acceptance-letters, radtastic Asian kids going to UCs in the decade(s) to come.

But dude, a school system that dumbs down the standards and evens the playing field, perhaps risking mediocrity for the sake of diversity and fairness? Uh, we’ll wager that the Asians won’t wanna go to any place like that no mo’ anyway. Lord knows their parents won’t.

[AP: New UC Admissions Policy Angers Asian-Americans]

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Thanks, Everybody!!!

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Prayer Hands Ain’t Gonna Save Ya Now

December 17th, 2007 | 0 comments | Posted by Diana

Oh Britney, Britney, Britney. I just got ready to watch your new video for “Piece of Me” and it got me all nostalgic, reminding me of the olden days when I worked out at the gym to the tune of “Oops!” and “I’m a Slave 4 U.” How I used to envy the shadowy sinews of your svelte seventeen-year old frame! How I admired your success at hiding a distinct inability to sing or speak in proper English. How I desperately wanted to move like you, ’cause GIRL, could you DANCE. You had MOVES!!!

What the fuzz has happened to your ability to hip shake? Seriously, I know you’re crazy, and your face is all toreUP, and you’ve got thighs like Thor, but none of those things should have an affect on your ability to move yo’ body. WHY CAN’T YOU DANCE ANYMORE? WHY ARE YOU JUST LAZILY SHUFFLING AROUND THE DANCE FLOOR? My grandma has a saying that goes something like, “if you aren’t going to be the best, kill yourself.” I’m not saying that you should kill yourself, ’cause that’s wrong or whatever, but I am calling you out on your half-assed two step. This shit is not gonna fly.

Listen to my grandma, Brit Brit, and next time you shoot a comeback video, show up for your choreography rehearsals.

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