You are currently browsing posts tagged with I Call Bullshit

Dare To Be Photoshopped

April 5th, 2010 | 7 comments | Posted by Diana

We know there’s more-a of Kimora than this ad for her new fragrance, Dare Me, would have you believe.




Should we have offered Baby Phat our own Photoshop services? (We would have at least attempted to get her head on straight.)

Or should Kimora continue to be, as she has said, “the type of woman to embrace [her] curves“–instead of the kind who cultivates a commercial image with somebody else’s lanky legs?

[via New York Magazine]

Source
Thanks, Tina!

Filed under: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

DISGRASIAN OF THE WEAK! Gloria Allred

April 2nd, 2010 | 4 comments | Posted by Diana

Famed, self-proclaimed “feminist lawyer” Gloria Allred has accomplished some bold and fascinating things during her long, high-profile career. She sued the Boy Scouts for excluding girls. She repped Nicole Brown Simpson’s family in the O.J. Simpson murder trial. In ’04, she filed the first lawsuit in California challenging the denial of marriage licenses as being unconstitutional.

But Allred also represents Tiger’s classiest mistress, Rachel Uchitel, and helped her nab $10 million to keep her trap shut about her sexy times with the year’s most famous philanderer. She took on client Josyln James, the porn star who’s been peddling her dirty wares alongside an online log of Tiger’s banausic sexts, and seeks an apology for James’s… time?

The attorney now stands alongside a new money-grubbing fame-seeking apology-seeking bandwagoneer: Woods’s kindergarten teacher, Maureen Decker. Decker feels wronged by a story that first appeared in Charles Barkley’s book The Wicked Game, which was published in 2005–and after five years realized that Tiger Woods was wrapped in a shit spiral and ladies everywhere could cash in if they played their cards right she couldn’t take the “migraines, elevated blood pressure, and colitis” for one more day, sought Allred’s inparticular counsel, and went public with her beef.

Does simply signing clients with vaginas make one a feminist? Because we kinda think that a truly pro-fem lawyer would have been the one working to secure Elin Nordegren’s future and due financial security. Instead, she’s taking a percentage of victories for women who feel they are owed something for spreading their legs and screwing somebody else’s husband. Ah, what a powerful message: “If I fuck you, you better take care of me.”

Source

Filed under: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

What Kind Of Mom Is Angelina, REALLY?

April 2nd, 2010 | 6 comments | Posted by Diana

In Touch caused quite a stir this week by releasing an exclusive interview with “Bill,” a man who claims to be a former bodyguard for Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt. The “ugly truth?” Angie’s apparently a bad mother:

“Bill’s” testimony:

“In my opinion, the real Angelina is self-centered and a control freak. She has no patience at all. She doesn’t do things out of the kindness of her heart. And she’s totally psycho.” While Brad is laid-back and patient with his kids’ often wild behavior, Angelina is anything but. “She screams and yells a lot, then walks away,” Bill says, explaining that Angelina would often “disappear into her suite for hours,” leaving staffers — and Brad — to deal with her children. “She would punish them with silence,” says Bill, adding, “I think she could be abusive at times in a mental way.” If the children were to get upset by her withholding behavior, he says, Angelina didn’t seem to care. “She is not moved by tears,” he explains. Still more disturbing, he recalls, Angelina has a “quirky habit” of “giggling when one of her kids would start crying.”

Hmm. This passage actually makes me feel kinda nostalgic (Mommy? Mommy?)…

Here’s a theory: Perhaps Mama Jolie has just been trying her darndest to be an authentic Hardass Asian Mom for her boys! Has anybody ever stopped to think of that? If this guy speaks the truth*, she’s doing a damn good job of giving Maddox and Pax a slice of home!

*Sorry, “Bill”–I don’t believe this shit for a second.

[In Touch: Exclusive Interview - The Ugly Truth About Angelina Jolie]

Source

Filed under: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Leave Lady GaGa Alone!

February 9th, 2010 | 9 comments | Posted by Diana

Just wanted to let you guys know that in her own words, Lady Gaga (aka Stefani Germanatta) is actually “very shy.”





Yeap. And I’m a crack-smoking, figure-skating, 7-foot-9 Norwegian with a bicycle fetish and PhD in abstract calculus, whose parents hugged and encouraged them to follow their heart, not their mind, too much as a child.

[Gossip Center: Lady GaGa Talks Shyness]

Source

Filed under: , , , , , , ,

Why Did I Just Spend Two Hours Examining Nude Photos of Vanessa Hudgens?

August 6th, 2009 | 0 comments | Posted by Diana

Back in late 2007, there was a lot of speculation about when the first set of leaked nude photos of tween icon Vanessa Hudgens were actually shot. Frankly, I believed her story: they were 3-year old snaps from roughly 2003, taken and once sent to her high school boyfriend (shockingly, if you did the math, this made her out to be about 14 or 15 in the shots). The ex was a bit of a bastard, and eventually got his jollies by disseminating the sexy pictures across the interwebz. Because she was so young, I felt reallyreallyreally almost-pedophil-icky just glancing at the images (the link above is to censored versions)–after all, Hudgens was essentially a child in them. A nude child, a famous nude child lacking judgment, and indeed a ripening sexual being, but a child nonetheless.

So I basically gave her a pass. No, it wasn’t a good idea to take those pictures of herself, but for chrissake, don’t we all do a bunch of stupid things when we’re kids? How smart can you actually be at 14 when half your brain is jelly and the other hormones? There’s no such thing as foresight at that time. Instead, I felt the blame was on us, grown-up people with nothing better to do than avoid our jobs by scouring gossip blogs and leer over dirty pictures of Disney stars. Pathetic. Icky. Shameful.

But it looks like Ms. Hudgens now faces another photo scandal, this time with nude and semi-nude photos recently hacked from her Blackberry. Lots of ‘em.

Tsk, Tsk

Does she get another pass? Perhaps not this time.

People in Hudgens’s camp apparently claim that these photos are as old or even older than the originals, but I’m not so sure. As you can probably see, her body shape has toned and matured significantly. The cheeks once adorably swollen with baby fat–quite evident in the original photos, seem oh-so-sinewy and adult in the latest. The glossy blowouts of her glamorous locks are consistent with her look of the last couple of years. And the black RAZR phone that she captures in this number:

Like, forever ago

…wasn’t released to special folks, like Hollywood stars, until mid-to-late 2005, and really saw its heyday from 2006 to 2007.

Then there’s that belly-button ring, which she apparently got in 2007, prominent in so many of the pictures. Hunh.

I’m not saying that these photos are from last week. But I am saying that I’m not buying this jazz about how Hudgens made one mistake six years ago, and it was one she never repeated.

Why does this bother me so much? Maybe because I’m convinced these pictures really have been living on Hudgen’s SIM card for a while. And for the life of me, I cannot understand why.

I absolutely, positively need to know why the MySpace generation, even its celebrity icons, are so desperate to document their goody-goods in easily sharable formats.

It’s not like these people don’t understand that we live in the shadow of Big Brother. He will find you, with his lipstick security camera or Flip cam or cameraphone, pissing yourself at a party or screwing somebody else’s boyfriend, whether you’re famous or not. Yes, once upon a time, a picture was just a picture–and if you destroyed the print, the film, and any potential Xeroxes you were in pretty good shape. Today, if you so much as think about attending a party, there’s already a photo of you there tagged on Facebook; its file remnants, regardless of what you do, forever living somewhere entangled within their intellectual property policy.

We as a people are becoming too well-documented. Pictures are too easy to take. I have about 60 photos in an album from my entire childhood; I’ve got 40 new pictures on my Blackberry of myself next to a super weird dog I met at a coffee shop last week. Put to record far more often, young celebrities are immortalized in thousands of photographs every day–they even enjoy the benefits of Photoshop–why in fuck’s sake would they need more? And why do they always take pics that are reminiscent of amateur video porn?

It disappoints me. And it frightens the hell out of me (Note to my womb: no future baby ever to be built in there will be given a cameraphone for Christmas). It’s yet another reminder that the up-and-coming stars of today aren’t like those in Hollywood’s golden years–those people with so much talent and presence and spark and “a certain something” that they simply needed to be harnessed and put on film–they’re just a bunch of kids that need attention, just like everybody else.

In the end, I still feel pretty icky about looking at the racy Hudgens photos. But perhaps now for a different reason.

[via Popcrunch]
[E! Online: Hudgens - The Real Story on Latest Nude Pics]
[OK!: Source Confirms Vanessa Hudgens Nude Pics are Real, and Real Old]

Source
Source

Filed under: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Oh, What a Knight

July 23rd, 2009 | 0 comments | Posted by Diana

In this week’s Entertainment Weekly, Grey’s Anatomy star T.R. Knight discusses why he’s the latest original cast member to fly the coop of the hit show.


Writer Michael Ausiello shared an exclusive excerpt from the story on EW.com:

“This fall, Knight was surprised to see his character George O’Malley all but vanish from the show — for the first nine episodes of season 5, he appeared on screen a total of only 48 minutes, compared to 114 for Sandra Oh’s Christina. Still, due to what he calls a gradual ‘breakdown of communication’ between himself and exec producer Shonda Rhimes, the actor chose not to ask his boss what was going on with his character. Instead, he simply asked to leave.”

I’m sure Grey’s ain’t no picnic, and don’t wanna hate on O’Malley or nuffin’, but let’s just make a fine distinction between that character and Christina Yang (Sandra Oh’s). Yang is a Type-A, no-nonsense, nuts-and-bolts, Asian female that settles only for perfection and wants nothing but to be the best. O’Malley is a self-doubting, doughy, little guy, that operates from a place of love and oh, happens to be a damn fine surgeon.

I’m from a family of docs, yo. People like O’Malley simply don’t exist. I’ve got three Yangs IN MY NUCLEAR FAMILY ALONE.

All I’m saying is that maybe the loss of screen time had something to do with the unrealistic nature of the George O’Malley character. I have never met a nice, cuddly surgeon–not EVER. They’re as real as jackalopes and unicorns and reasonably-priced airport food and short DMV lines. Anybody that says otherwise is a big, fat liar.

So perhaps Grey’s is simply taking a turn towards truthfulness.

…It is TV, though. That’d be a first.

[EW's Ausiello Files: This week's cover: 'Grey's Anatomy' star T.R. Knight reveals why he left the hit show]

Source

Filed under: , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Stuff It

May 2nd, 2008 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

Quoted in the current issue of People magazine:

“I want to be with a nerd because they’re happy with who they are, and I think nerdy stuff is sexy. I like to watch the History Channel and learn about the universe, quantum physics and stuff like that.”–Tila Tequila

OMFG Tila! My Dad would be perfect for you! (Too bad my Mom is still in the picture–do you believe in bigamy? Oh right, you’re bi…perfect!) He’s a physics professor, knows A LOT about the universe, could go on and on about quantum mechanics, and is an expert on “STUFF.” Yeah, not to brag, but he knows all kinds of stuff about stuff and other stuff and more stuff and you can never have too much stuff stuff. He likes to eat Thanksgiving stuffing! He gladly stuffs stockings! He shops at any store whose name ends in “‘n’ stuff”! It would be a match made in stuff heaven!!! Think about it! I’m stuffing serious!!!

Source Stuff

Filed under: , , , , , , ,