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China Gets a Hummer (UPDATE)

June 26th, 2009 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

A Chinese company has reached a tentative agreement to buy GM’s bankrupt-in-every-sense-of-the-word Hummer division.

Which means we’re witnessing the dawn of a new age–China becoming a nation of 1.3 billion douchebags!

For those who were extremely terrified of Chinese people before…buckle your seatbelts.

[UPDATE: BusinessWeek reports that China may block the sale because of its "energy-saving goals." Douchebag Crisis averted?]

Thanks, @MarisaNakasone!
Thanks, Neal!

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Bai Ling Gives Good Hummer

August 1st, 2008 | 0 comments | Posted by Diana

I decided recently that, even though I’m shelling out the equivalent of a mortgage on gas every month, I’m pretty stoked about the fuel crisis. Yeah man, I’m down with the $5 gallon. Vespas are back (my heart melts every time I see a smart-looking gal zipping along with her scarf flapping in the wind. It’s so Quadrophenia. It’s so Roman Holiday. It’s so Ready, Steady, Go!). Parking has certainly gotten easier (unless you’re trying to find a pole to tie up your Bianchi bike). But the best result of all: General Motors has been forced to admit that their Hummer brand is in danger.

I’m glad that finally, FINALLY, it’s the general consensus to laugh and point at the morons stupid enough to put a down payment on one of these butt-ugly, gaz-guzzling, fuck-natural-resources-this-world-is-for-me-me-me tankmobiles. Now we point, we giggle, we wonder aloud how bloody crazy a fuzzin’ person would have to be to park their ass in the drivers seat of one of those things, dumping in double tanks of fuel just to drive to the corner store. I mean, how crazy would you have to be?

I always love the Hummer….. Big powerful and cute and safe…… But yet very very dangerous too…….”

OH. THAT crazy.

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