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Dr. Li-Ann Thio hates gays.
In 2007, as a member of Singaporean Parliament, Dr. Thio argued against repealing a statute that criminalized gay sex. In her arguments, she said, “You cannot make a human wrong a human right” and “Diversity is not a license for perversity.” She also likened anal sex to “shoving a straw up your nose to drink.” Today, gay sex in Singapore is still illegal.
Dr. Li-Ann Thio is also a law professor, who has been invited to teach a course at NYU this fall in–don’t snort so hard that that straw falls out of your nose–HUMAN RIGHTS LAW. NYU has said that Dr. Thio will add a “valuable contribution” to intellectual campus life. And Dr. Thio defended her own hiring by saying:
“I think certain Americans have to realise the fact that there are a diversity of views on the subject and it is not a settled matter; there is no universal norm and it is nothing short of moral imperialism to suggest there is.“
Oh, and fuck you very much.
Watch Dr. Thio’s arguments before Parliament on YouTube where she asserts that legalizing gay sex will “subvert social morality, the common good, and undermine our liberties.”
[via Above the Law]
Lord knows I can be hard on Sienna Miller, because I think she’s shameless, utterly useless and… well… rather used-up-looking trash. Also I’ve never seen a remarkable performance submitted by her, and I really don’t know why she’s famous, save for toting the same ratty Balenciaga bag around for years, and laying a fun amalgam of unusual male conquests.
However, as Jen–with barfy reluctance–pointed out to me this week: there may be a more serious side to the wacktress. One of Jen’s friends actually just finished leading Miller on a humanitarian visit through the Congo, which the starlet travel-blogged about on the Huffington Post. Hmm.
Suddenly, I realized that it’s possible that I’m just a judgemental, hateful person. A grouchy sour-graper with a laptop and an attitude, who shouldn’t necessarily get on some high horse to criticize those in the public eye–people like Sienna Miller who simply can’t catch a break from the media when they make mistakes, people like Sienna Miller who don’t have the luxury of being able to start over and try again without the scrutiny ofzZzzZZZzzzzzZzzzzzzzzZzz.
Oh, who am I kidding? I still hate the bitch.
Filed under: Attempts at Validity, Great Lays, Haterasian, Huffington Post, Humanitarian Missions, Paparazzi Whores, Sienna Miller is Famous for...for...Uh, Sienna Miller is Gross, The Congo, Wacktors
Listen, I don’t want to knock Emily Ho, profiled this week by LA Weekly’s Jonathan Gold, whose meteoric rise from Lakers fan girlfriend to Sasha “The Machine” Vujacic enthusiast to webmaster of the Official Site of the shooting guard is nothing to sniff at.
There’s a part of me that wants to hate– the reallyreallybitchy part of me that first and foremost despises the fucking Lakers (Uh, no, I do not care how good they are). And carries a deep, personal aversion to Lakers fan girlfriends, like my college roommate (who knew dog piddle about hoops when I met her, but to impress her grad school beau, began sporting yellow-and-purple tanks, yelling at the TV for players on the wrong team, and doubting my knowledge of key player trades–something she had, in just one season, not yet witnessed).
This icky thing inside of me also starts snippy, snarling fights with ladies in pumps and half-tops that pretend to watch ball at sports bars without ever turning towards the screen. And it deeply protests the manufacture of team jerseys in pink for female fans, since they don’t contribute to a team’s color domination of a stadium–and overall are cheesy, embarrassing, and offensive. This aspect of me will try to remain silent on the topic of Emily Ho.
A nicer (albeit smaller) part of me celebrates Ho’s opportunity, as well as her commitment to a competitive sport. And thinks it’s just great that her Vujacic official site, which seems primarily trafficked by enthusiastic females (and is loved and supported by the player and his family), isn’t just a virtual beer garden loaded up with stats, action shots, and sports trivia. Instead it’s a fun, girly, window-into-the-celebrity-soul kinda space, featuring interviews with fans and sexy desktop designs; where the athlete Twitters and answers novice questions like, “What’s the best thing about being on the Lakers?” In a way, it lowers the bar of entry in terms of committed fandom of Mr. Vujacic, if not the team and the sport as well: Why focus on a player’s numbers when you might just like his headwear? Why can’t sports enthusiasm be emotional? Why can’t it be about attraction? Why can’t it be about swarthy skin and flowing hair?
Okay, I’ll say it: As if the bar wasn’t low enough.
But last night, as I watched the Lakers do a number on the Utah Jazz (save for that nail-biter of a 4th quarter) to advance in the playoffs, yet another (but still very grouchy) part of me rumbled a little. It must have been Vujacic in his stupid black headband, celebrating his big, dumb team’s victory in the series, or something. But I couldn’t help but think about how his official site would soon be buzzing with rabid girl fans hurriedly typing out their post-playoff-game burners: “Is there a locker room afterparty?” or “Does Gatorade in your clothes get sticky?” or “How often do you wash your hair?” By God, it made me crazy to think that his Twitter followers would soon be lauding him for how cute he looked at the line, instead of the intensity of his game.
And I just couldn’t hold it back anymore. So here I go:
I HATE SASHA VUJACIC’S OFFICIAL SITE. IT’S REALLY FUCKING LAME AND SHAMELESS, EVEN FOR A LAKER.
(Fine, I’m a player hater.)
Filed under: Basketball, Bloggers, Emily Ho, Haterasian, LA Lakers, Men Should Never Wear Headbands And For that Matter Neither Should Women, NBA, Pink Jerseys, Professional Athletes, Sasha Vujacic, The Machine
at Hollywood’s Chateau Marmont, March 28
TILA: Me too! Thanks for buying lunch.
MEGHAN: Well, you said you couldn’t find your wallet.
TILA: Oh! Um, yeah!
MEGHAN: Um, you’re welcome.
TILA: You have a lot of dough though, right? I mean your mom’s totally loaded.
MEGHAN: Well I don’t really like to talk about money.
TILA: Oh. Why?
MEGHAN: I’ve always heard it’s kinda tacky. Kinda like talking smack about your dad’s first family when they’re not around to defend themselves. Not like my mom does that or anything.
TILA: Hey, did you buy your boobs?
MEGHAN: Excuse me?
TILA: God, you must have bought really expensive ones. They’re so real, it completely looks like it’s all real fat in there.
MEGHAN: Er, yeah, my breasts are real.
TILA: Oh my gaw! Praise the lawd Jesus! I love ‘em! You’ve got awesome tits, girl.
MEGHAN: Thank you. Everybody loves my boobs.
TILA: I just want to stuff my face in them and then make out with your thighs for my vlog. And then take you home to meet my parents.
MEGHAN: I, uh, okay.
TILA: And gaw, I’m like, just so glad we hooked up on Twitter! Ha… you can actually say “I hooked up with Tila Tequila… on Twitter.”
MEGHAN: Yeah… I… could?
TILA: It’s just that when I found that you like, fully looked up to me, I just sooooo wanted to like, reach out, like to a little sis or an um, like, rabid fan, or whatever. I can’t believe you’re my rabid fan! I love that!
MEGHAN: Oh girl, I love you. But I don’t know if you could call me a “rabid fan,” per se. It’s not really like that. I just think it’s cool that you–
TILA: Make out with chicks.
MEGHAN: Well, not–
TILA: Have beautiful, big tits.
MEGHAN: I mean–
TILA: Hate the gooks.
MEGHAN: You–wait, what?
TILA: You wanna “If You Seek Amy!” Girrrrl!!!
MEGHAN: Um, Tila, I think I might just going through a rebellious stage. I hate my parents. My mom’s a robot.
TILA: Mine too!
MEGHAN: That’s awesome.
TILA: I know. So annnyways, when I realized we were going to lunch, I was like, we’re gonna dress all ladylike, right? So I’m gonna wear a little black dress and my classiest stilettos! And then I was all like, ohmigosh. Pearl necklace. I’ve gotta wear a pearl necklace!
MEGHAN: Are those… pearls?
TILA: Well, I mean, kinda! Anyway, pearl necklaces are like my favorite thing. If you know what I mean! [snorts]
MEGHAN: Yes, I think I do. Hey, not to get or technical or anything, but I think those balls on your necklace are more accurately meant to appear “pearl-like.”
TILA: [suddenly emotional] Girl, don’t hate.
TILA: Are you being a hater?
MEGHAN: I… I’m sorry, what?
TILA: I have suffered so much hardship in my life already. And when you’re on top [snorts], people just want to take you down. They wanna be haters! And I say, fuck the haters!
MEGHAN: Tila, I’m not… I’m not hating.
TILA: Fuck the haters! Don’t be a hater! Don’t breaka my stride, girl! Don’t hate!
MEGHAN: I just spent two-hundred bucks on lunch. Why would I hate?
TILA: Girl, don’t talk about money. That’s just tacky.
MEGHAN: I just told you that!
TILA: Bitch, please! [whips out Blackberry]
MEGHAN: What are you doing?
TILA: I’m tweeting this.
MEGHAN: Oh my fucking God. You’re like a goddamn Twitter addict!
TILA: Yeah, I twitter a lot, ho! Right now I’m saying that you’re a cunty, money-grubbing, hater bitch. Should show up on your phone in a second. Oh, and now I’m saying that you take the Lord’s name in vain.
MEGHAN: Oh my god, you’re a full-on psycho.
TILA: Right now I’m tweeting that you’re a full-on psycho.
MEGHAN: I hate you.
TILA: I didn’t vote for your dad.
MEGHAN: Who cares? Neither did I!
TILA: I’m tweeting that.
MEGHAN: AUGHHHHHHH! [exits]
Filed under: Addiction, Boobs, Celebrity Twitterers, Chateau Marmont, Circus Tits, Drive-Bis, Haterasian, John McCain, Lunch, Meghan McCain, Odd Couples, Rebellion, Shameless Photo Ops, Tila Tequila, Twitter
Close to a thousand people from several dozen Bay Area churches gathered in a Silicon Valley park Sunday to support Proposition 8, the gay marriage ban, in what the Mercury News described as a “largely Asian crowd.” The group turned the rally into a full-blown rager, letting their Jesus Freak flag fly by singing Christian songs, reciting Biblical passages, and blathering on about the sanctity of marriage.
One spokesman for the “Yes on 8″ campaign in attendance disputed the recent poll finding that the majority of Californiasians reject the ban, saying the results were based on old data. Other people there said that marriage between a man and woman was the “foundation of traditional Asian societies.” (And here we thought it was perfect grades, pale skin, a mastery of a musical instrument, and fuel-efficient, economy-size sedans. Huh.)
Then there was one Yuki Ku, who told a reporter:
“God created marriage, and we’re his creations. We don’t have the privilege or right to say anything,” she said. “He’s the author of the universe.”
A sentiment we couldn’t have expressed better ourselves. But here’s our awkward paraphrase: SO SHUT YOUR CRAZY PIEHOLE, BITCH.
Perhaps you said what I said: WOOHOO! WE RULE! WE’LL WIN THIS THING! I’M SO PSYCHED ABOUT MY FELLOW YELLOWS!
…’Cuz if that’s what happens on November 4, we really will rule and I deserve to be super psyched.
Of course, as we continued to peruse through the rest of the facts about voters that have decided on their candidate, one glaring fact did emerge and pop our celebratory bubble:
Uh–what? Gotta ask all ma peeps now: WHY? Is it because yer all like, “He totally fought those fucking Cong Commies!” or “We ran away from big government, muthafucka, we ain’t goin’ down like that again!” or “I like that Palin lady–she’s spunky!” or “He only said he’ll ‘hate the gooks’ for as long as he’s alive, and that couldn’t possibly be very much longer?”
Um, well, at least I’m super psyched about a third of my fellow American gooks.
Let’s face it. Nobody writes letters any more. And that’s just sad. We’d like to bring letter-writing back, so we present our DOTW this week in epistolary fashion:
You like writing letters? Us, too! Let’s be friends.
pen pals 4eva,
your partners in haterasian,
You held a grudge for 20 years? Dayum, man. That’s more hardcore than Jen’s dad, who will disown you if you have, like, bad taste in movies. We’re not sayin’ that that’s healthy or anything. But it is pretty darn Asian.
good luck with that,
Hold up. You hate black people? And you wrote over 200 hate letters and emails to black men because a black guy “stole” your girlfriend 20 years ago? Duuude. You got problems. We are sooo not down with you. Neither is the U.S. justice system, which just sentenced you to three years in the clink.
P.S. Forget about us writing to you in prison or, like, ever again. Because, like Jen’s dad, we hold a pretty mean grudge ourselves. And once, as Heidi Klum would say, you’re out, your ass is out, naw mean?
A friend of mine who works as a public defender in New York once told me that he doesn’t like putting animal lovers on juries because they tend to love animals more than they do people. Universally true or not, this could certainly be said for French animal-rights wacktivist Brigitte Bardot, who was convicted yesterday of inciting racial hatred in a 2006 letter to then-Interior Minister Nicolas Sarkozy, in which she complained that Muslims were “destroying us, destroying our country by imposing its acts.” The letter was later published in her foundation’s journal.
Bardot was fined for the offense, which is her FIFTH CONVICTION for inciting racial hatred. Her lawyer said after the conviction that Bardot “has the impression that people want to silence her,” but he could not confirm whether or not it was all that hateration that has made his client’s face–once the “Face of France”–resemble a stale, puckered, marshmallowy abortion.