You are currently browsing posts tagged with FOX News is a Joke

DISGRASIAN OF THE WEAK! The Sherrod Charade

July 24th, 2010 | 2 comments | Posted by Jen

Shirley Sherrod

Back in March, Andrew Breitbart wrote a post called “2010: A Race Odyssey — Disproving a Negative for Cash Prizes or, How the Civil Rights Movement Jumped the Shark” for Big Journalism, one of his five websites, in which he claimed that accusations of racism are merely a “trick” of the Left:

As I have said over and over and over, the left has one trick that it will use again and again when its back is in the corner: shout ‘racist’ in a crowded country.

Which is funny, given how Breitbart was the first to post that heavily-edited and manipulated video of USDA employee Shirley Sherrod giving a speech at an NAACP event, and the first to call Sherrod’s speech racist:

“In this piece you will see video evidence of racism coming from a federal appointee and NAACP award recipient and in another clip from the same event a perfect rationalization for why the Tea Party needs to exist.”

That video, which appeared on July 19, touched off a two day-orgy on the part of the right wing-media, in which not only Sherrod, but the NAACP, civil rights activists, the so-called mainstream media, the Obama administration, and pretty much anyone who’s ever been engaged or concerned with race issues was labeled racist. Media Matters For America has a full timeline, but here are a few highlights:

“The—this woman on tape saying these racially charged things that she didn’t want to help farmers, in particular white farmer. That she said she wanted him to go out and deal with one of his own and she put him in touch with a white lawyer. Just the latest in a series of racial incidents.”–Sean Hannity, Hannity, July 19

“The former civil rights group known as the NAACP does not just invite anti-Semite Louis Farrakhan and radical America-hating Marxist Jeremiah Wright to speak at their events…They also invite government officials who hate whitey Continue reading DISGRASIAN OF THE WEAK! The Sherrod Charade

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This Is America, Speak English (Unless You’re FOX News)

May 3rd, 2010 | 17 comments | Posted by Jen

For a nation of immigrants, America’s fast becoming a country of self-haters.

You see this not only in an anti-immigration law like Arizona’s recently-passed SB 1070, but also in the “This is America, speak English” movement that’s been rearing its ugly head all over the country lately.

Teabaggers everywhere are saying you better learn it if you want to live here.

Alabama GOP gubernatorial candidate Tim James is saying you better learn it if you want to drive here (see below).

And the Arizona Department of Education is saying you not only better learn it if you want to teach here, you better speak it without a foreign accent, comprende?

But look. Is it such a terrible idea to get rid of people in this country who can’t speak, read, or write in our unofficial official language? I know, I know, it sounds crazy. And racist. And fascist. And, um, racist? But what would you say if I proposed we start here:

Continue reading This Is America, Speak English (Unless You’re FOX News)

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ROCK OF TEA PARTY NASIAN: Lisa Mei Norton

April 28th, 2010 | 10 comments | Posted by Diana

Have you heard about Lisa Mei Norton, right-wing Christian conservative country singer/songwriter?

America's rack!

She wants to keep her guns, finds Michelle Malkin and her ilk to be “smart,” thinks we’ve gone socialist, believes Obama wasn’t born here and loves to (tea) party. Oh, and she’s already working on the indoctrinasian of her six-year-old son. Translasian: She watches Fox News.

Check out her buzzword-laden Tea Party anthem, “A Revolution’s Brewing,” a lovely ditty for all 3,000 of those adorable, overly-acknowledged, grammatically-challenged teabaggers:

Continue reading ROCK OF TEA PARTY NASIAN: Lisa Mei Norton

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BIRTHDAY CELEBRASIAN! Sarah Palin

February 11th, 2010 | 8 comments | Posted by Jen

Happy birthday to Sarah Palin, who turns 46 today!

Age ain’t nothin’ but a number, right?

Here are some other numbers to chew on on this special occasion (cuz we’re Asian, and we love math):

Continue reading BIRTHDAY CELEBRASIAN! Sarah Palin

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The Politicizasian Of Suffering In Haiti

January 13th, 2010 | 5 comments | Posted by Diana

That ignorant windbag Pat Robertson’s theory as to why Haiti was struck by yesterday’s devastating 7.0 earthquake, which has tragically taken hundreds of thousands of lives, is not surprising: the country made a pact with the Devil to escape French colonialism, of course! (Crikey. Let’s not forget that this man and his evangelist buddy, Jerry Falwell, once blamed the 9/11 attacks on gays and the ACLU.)

And it’s hardly shocking the Rush Limbaugh discouraged Americans from contributing to relief efforts, at least those linked at the White House “propaganda” website:

Continue reading The Politicizasian Of Suffering In Haiti

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We’re Employed Through The Year! (Sarah Palin Joins Fox News)

January 11th, 2010 | 3 comments | Posted by Diana

You never know, as garbage-feeding bloggers, whether or not you’ll get fucked by the wrong famous-for-nothing going sober or the world’s worst couple getting divorced. Will you run out of sordid news fodder? What might you have to complain about? Will your blogging career be downgraded to a month-long series of clever Facebook status updates and a few choice tweets? Oh lordy, the stress!

So it’s always good to know that the world will soon be hit by a fruitful period of shame, therefore guaranteeing you good work for months and months to come (dare I say it–years?).

Imagine my relief, friends, when I saw this breaking news today:


Turn the volume down




Phew. Phew, phew, phew. 2010 is going to be a busy year for DISGRASIAN!

[CBS News: Sarah Palin Joining Fox News as Contributor]

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DISGRASIAN OF THE WEAK! G. Gordon Liddy Thinks Bill Clinton Brought Back a Dead Giant Panda and a Dick from North Korea

August 7th, 2009 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

Poor Gordon Liddy. The 78 year-old Watergate mastermind appears to be losing his mind. On Wednesday, while most of the country was busy heralding the safe return of American journalists Euna Lee and Laura Ling from North Korea–FOX News and other right-wing fearmongers being notable exceptions–Liddy announced on his radio show that “Ling-Ling and Wee-Wee…have been brought back by Bill Clinton to the United States.”

Listen:

Now, Ling-Ling was one of the two giant pandas (pictured with her mate Hsing-Hsing) given to the U.S. by China following President Nixon’s historic visit there in 1972. You know, the same president that Liddy served under and served time for. It’s only natural to assume, then, that Liddy is suffering from moderate dementia–symptoms of which include “forgetting names and faces” and “remembering events from the past as though they are the present”–and that’s why he’s confusing Laura Ling with Ling-Ling, a giant panda who died in 1992.


And we all know what a Wee-Wee is. (Lady Gaga even has one, evidently!) But why Liddy would conflate Euna Lee with a dick is beyond us. Perhaps he’s been playing with his own wee-wee a bit too much lately?

Which would mean Liddy’s brain is not only degenerating, it’s moving rapidly from moderate to severe dementia, symptoms of which include…”uncontrollable movements.

Like we said, poor Gordon Liddy.

[Media Matters for America: Liddy tells joke about "Ling Ling and Wee Wee" "being locked up for nine hours in an airplane with Bill Clinton"]
[via Salon]

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Bill O’Reilly Proves He’s Sympathetic to Rape Victims by Victimizing a Female Journalist

March 26th, 2009 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

Last weekend, Bill O’Reilly stalked ThinkProgress journalist Amanda Terkel while she was on vacation and ambushed her with a camera, all because Terkel had pointed out how creepy it was that O’Reilly was going to host a fundraiser for rape victims when he had played “blame the rape victim” on his show in the past. Specifically, Terkel cited that in 2006, O’Reilly said about 18 year-old rape and murder victim Jennifer Moore:

Now Moore, Jennifer Moore, 18, on her way to college. She was 5-foot-2, 105 pounds, wearing a miniskirt and a halter top with a bare midriff. Now, again, there you go. So every predator in the world is gonna pick that up at two in the morning.

In retaliation, O’Reilly sent one of his minions to corner Terkel in Virginia and try to shame her on camera:

Keith Olbermann had Terkel on his show Tuesday and speculated that with O’Reilly’s ratings and relevance down these days, “We all knew Bill O’Reilly would do something to try to force the spotlight back onto him.”

And the only thing missing from O’Reilly’s desperate bid for attention was him putting on a miniskirt and a midriff-baring halter top.

Shocked he overlooked that detail!

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Gaining Weighsian

January 28th, 2009 | 0 comments | Posted by Diana

Listen, guys. I’ll be honest. I haven’t done yoga in almost two years. I take the stairs up to my office–sometimes. I walk the dog around the block in the morning and night, and sometimes I walk fast, but that’s about where I max out. The way I see it, “exercise and my blogging life don’t mix.”

Sure, in the wee hours of the night, I somehow manage to make time to munch on sour ropes while wasting zombies on Xbox. Meanwhile, I find a way to house burritos at my local taco cart after any given night of drinking. And certainly, I don’t miss an opportunity to indulge my sweet tooth after gobbling the pie, crust and all, at Pizzeria Mozza.

My point is, I’m like anyone. Sometimes I get a little chubsy, sometimes less so. Perhaps it’s face bloat or hormones, post-holiday or high-stress, but sheez–it happens to us all. And I can deal with that. I have to. My favorite aunt and godmother–a zaftig, warm, no-nonsense, little woman–used to hug me hello with her big, soft arms. After a good squeeze, she would inevitably step back and say, “You are a little fatter than the last time I saw you. Most of it is in your face, but your legs are a little big, too.” It’s not a bad way to look at it. It’s just the truth; not really a positive or a negative, just the big, fat truth.

Yesterday, I posted a picture of Jessica Simpson, who is arguably enjoying her rejuvenated love life, and is (as always) compelled to dress up her new curves with detestable lycra and the world’s most unflattering pair of high-waisted pants. This is hardly the first time she’s dressed herself up in this fashion when riding the love train. In fact, her inclination to do so is now striking me as a behavioral pattern, which is just weird.

Apparently, I’m not the only bored blogger raising an eyebrow at Jessica’s puff. Some folks laid into her rather hard, and because she and her sister don’t have much in terms of career to speak of, they paid attention.

Ashlee (lil’ sis) even blogged about it (and since we’re blogging, I’ve included my responses below in RED):

I am completely disgusted by the headlines concerning my sister’s weight. A week after the inauguration and with such a feeling of hope in the air for our country, I find it completely embarrassing and belittling to all women to read about a woman’s weight or figure as a headline on Fox News.

Wait, are we talking about the same Fox News that boasted the “Obama/Biden, Osama Bin Laden, Coincidence?” headline last year? Or the Fox News that captioned The First Lady as “Obama’s Baby Mama?” Don’t be fooled by the moniker, lady–”News” is hardly their forte.

All women come in different shapes, sizes, and forms and just because you’re a celebrity, there shouldn’t be a different standard.

Uh, Ash? Celebrities are held to a different standard, particularly female celebrities. You should know this, and moreover be glad about it. That’s why y’all make magical livings just for being famous-ish. It’s why you’re photographed doing mundane activities like buying gas (just like Us!) and shopping for ugly cotton clothes on Robertson Boulevard. You, and your sister, like most of this decade’s celebutards, are not the most talented performers of our generation–if one would argue that you’re talented at all. You’re clothes hangers, club promoters, restaurant PR tools. The least you can do is keep your face clear, keep your tummy tucked, and name check Ed Hardy in OK! Magazine. Do your part. There’s not much to it.

Is this something you would say to your wife, daughter, mother, grandmother, or even a friend?

I seriously doubt it.

I wouldn’t say much more to my mother and grandmother than, “My job is great! It pays very well. I honor you and our ancestors!”

My grandmother, on the other hand, had no problem telling me when I was looking plump and juicy.

How can we expect teenage girls to love and respect themselves in an environment where we criticize a size 2 figure?

I don’t know man, that’s a question for God, I guess. Let me know how that Q&A goes.

Now can we focus on the things that really matter.

Yeah! Like why any person would name their baby after Mowgli, a goddamn Jungle Book character? Jungle Book, which, besides being the world’s lamest source of name inspiration, is actually a racist fucking story. Wait, should we table this conversation and just deal with it on Fox News?

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About Friggin’ Time

September 24th, 2008 | 0 comments | Posted by Diana


We learned while reading HuffPo today (surprisingly, not our own posts, but others’) that Chickaboomer just confirmed the firing of the Fox News producer responsible for the Michelle Obama “Baby Mama” chyron.

That’s cool and all, but why not boot Michelle Malkin while they’re at it? She’s little and easy to punt.

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Fuck You, FOX "News." Again.

August 26th, 2008 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen


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