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Hate Your Hardass Parents? Auction Off Your Virginity On Reality TV

May 13th, 2010 | 3 comments | Posted by Diana

Even after I give birth to my first child, I’m pretty sure I’m going to tell my mom and dad that I’m a virgin. It’s like, my duty as the fourth child of two Hardass Asian Parents (who, as far as I know, are also virgins). It’s how we roll, yo. We’re expected to avoid dating but marry someone rich and virile, have babies without ever making sweet monkey love, and teach our kids to do the same.

So the first thing I thought when I read on HuffPo that an Aussie producer put together a cast willing to auction off their virginities to the highest bidder for a reality TV show was: I’ll be damned if there’s an Asian-Australian on that show!!! Hardass Asian Parents would go ape shit.

Apparently, all of the parents are pretty unhappy about the show’s concept.

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DISGRASIAN OF THE WEAK! That Nerdy Little O’Keefe Gang

January 29th, 2010 | 0 comments | Posted by Diana

Early twenty-something boys don’t catch a lot of breaks, it’s true. Sure, they’ve started wearing ties to work–but they’re still making coffee. They spend dinner on the couch with $5 footlongs, a bong, the roommate who shits twice as much and never buys toilet paper. They have unexplainable indoor furniture (1980s rolling desk, black entertainment stand, armless teal fabric La-Z-Boy knockoff) on their outdoor balcony. Their early twenty-something ex-girlfriend is now (joyfully) screwing a thirty-something with a tastefully furnished starter house and an Audi.

Ah, dude life after college.

So there’s a part of me that understands why the four guys in the “O’Keefe Gang” (that little nickname is just so adowwable) dressed up as telephone company workers to tap Democratic Senator Mary Landrieu’s federal building phones (no, they did not crib this saucy ploy from a Martin Lawrence film), in hopes of embarassing her and taking widespread Conservatard credit for it–typically the kind of instant notariety that only causing a public smear of a non-profit fighting institutionalized disenfranchisement or creating the world’s biggest timesuck can earn you. They wanted to be important! They wanted to count for something! AWW!

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