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I’m An Asian Woman And I Think Blog Posts Defining That Identity By Who Someone Like Me Would Or Wouldn’t Date Are Bullshit

September 26th, 2012 | 16 comments | Posted by Jen

Is there a worthwhile discussion to be had about interracial dating and relationships?

The answer seems to be no, if you’ve paid any attention to posts written on the subject that have been blowing up my little patch of the Internet lately. Of course I’m referring to “I’m An Asian Woman And I Refuse To Ever Date An Asian Man” by Jenny An, and the clickbait-y response to An’s clickbait-y call, “I Am An Asian Woman And I Think Asian Boyfriends Are Superior (Well, Mine Is Anyway),” by Clarissa Wei, both published on xojane, a site to which I’ve contributed.

Simply put: I’m An Asian Woman And I Think This Conversation Sucks.

First things first. I don’t give a fuck who these women fuck or, really, what any woman chooses to do with her own vagina. Because it’s her own vagina, get it? And because it’s her own vagina, she doesn’t need to justify what she does with it. It should go without saying that a woman can do whatever she wants with her own body. But when she feels the need to explain why she does what she does with it, which is what these posts boil down to for me, she’s just playing into this very old and very male idea that a woman needs to justify what she does with her own body because, ultimately, she doesn’t have authority over, I repeat, her own body. Sound familiar? It should (see: “the war on women”).

The other problem with these posts is that they put race and gender at odds with one another, like they have this mutually exclusive relationship, and you have to choose one or the other to have some kind of cohesive identity. If you believe An’s argument–which she later backpedaled on, calling it “a character” designed to provoke discussion–as an Asian woman, in order to reject “patriarchy and cultural sexism,” you have to be a racist dick and Continue reading I’m An Asian Woman And I Think Blog Posts Defining That Identity By Who Someone Like Me Would Or Wouldn’t Date Are Bullshit

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AMAZIAN OF THE WEEK! Olivia Munn Is The Internet’s Helen Of Troy

July 12th, 2010 | 13 comments | Posted by Jen

Theory: Olivia Munn is the internet’s Helen of Troy.

Like Helen, who was part-god, part-mortal, Olivia is mixed race!

Like Helen, Olivia’s beauty is renowned!

Like Helen, Olivia starts wars! (Of the blogging variety, which is maybe not as sexy as the hairy, sweaty, leather-clad, gladiator-besandaled and totally homoerotic variety, but still.)

Continue reading AMAZIAN OF THE WEEK! Olivia Munn Is The Internet’s Helen Of Troy

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Our New Favorite “F” Word: FEMINISTA, A Book By Erica Kennedy [Q&A]

November 13th, 2009 | 3 comments | Posted by Jen

We’ve talked in the past about how we’re not exactly fans of the “F” word: feminist. It’s a term that carries a lot of baggage, sounds outmoded, and, after 100 years of usage and abusage, just may be beyond reinvention at this point. Fortunately, our pal, Erica Kennedy (Bling), has discovered a workaround in the word “FEMINISTA”–and y’all know how made-up words are our reason for being–which also happens to be the title of her new book. FEMINISTA tells the story of tough, chic celebrity journalist Sydney Zamora who decides one day, as she’s staring down the barrel of her mid-thirties, that she needs to “have it all” and find a worthy partner. (As you can imagine, complications ensue.)

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We were lucky to have a virtual sit-down with Erica recently and talk more about our new favorite “F” word:

What is a FEMINISTA? How did you come up with that?

FEMINISTA is my word for the empowered woman of style. It’s about the duality of being a woman today. We’re strong and supple. We’re ambitious and nurturing. We can be smart and sexy. We’re not trying to “have it all”, we’re trying to balance whatever our all is.

I actually came across the word when I was reading Lipstick Jungle, Candace Bushnell’s novel, and I realized it fit this idea of duality that I was already thinking about. When people hear the word “feminist” they think of a strong woman and any “-ista” coinage makes us think of a fashionable woman. FEMINISTA is a meld of those two things: the empowered woman who MIGHT want a career and a partner and babies and cute shoes that show off her pretty pink toenails – maybe all at once, maybe not at all. FEMINISTA is about defining ourselves.

Publisher’s Weekly called you the “pioneer of bitch lit.” How do you feel about that tag?

Continue reading Our New Favorite “F” Word: FEMINISTA, A Book By Erica Kennedy [Q&A]

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