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Nope, No Ginormous Boob Skanks Over Here!

December 16th, 2008 | 0 comments | Posted by Diana


As you may recall from last week, the poor gal photographed near Michael Phelps at LAX Airport was subsequently called everything under the sun: Phelps’ girlfriend, a “busomy, exotic stranger”, a “stacked stripper”, a “total stranger”, a “stalker”, “some little Asian girl with buoys strapped to her chest“, and of course, “a fug Asian chick” (to name a few).

But let it be known, as declared right here and now (or, more accurately, on TMZ) that this woman refuses to be referred to as:

A GINORMOUS BOOB SKANK

…and for legitimate reasons. What reasons, you may be asking?

In her words: “I’m not a ‘ginormous boob skank’, oh my god. Oh my god. I am not a ginormous boob skank.”

And in her friend’s words: “[unfomfortable chuckle] She’s not a skank.”

The funny thing is, we did some homework and can’t seem to find anywhere on TMZ where she was referred to as a ginormous boob skank. And actually, given our extensive research (Google), we aren’t actually certain that anybody of note ever did.

But there you have it folks, it seems like most of the monikers you’ve bestowed upon this fine lady are, indeed, just fine. But “ginormous boob skank”–as the lady says it–is totally fucking off limits.

Source Source Source Source

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ANTM’s Sheena Sakai: Bust-ed

September 11th, 2008 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

Sheena Sakai got busted for having fake TyTys last night on America’s Next Top Model. Paulina Porizkova asked her flat-out (so to speak) if her breasts were fake and Sheena said, “No, Ma’am,” which I imagine made the 43 year-old judge vomit in her pretty mouth because cool chicks married to rockers don’t cotton to being called “Ma’am.” (By the way, have you ever wondered what Paulina and Ric Ocasek talk about, like, over breakfast?) But Sheena had a change of heart and came forward again after all the girls had been addressed by the judges to, as she said, get something “off (her) chest” (around the 5:00 mark):

Which was an incredible set-up for Tyra to then have her Oprah moment and tell Sheena:

I knew your breasts were not real. But one thing that I feel is absolutely beautiful is that you stepped forward and you said, you know what, I’m gonna tell the truth.

And that’s when I vomited in my pretty mouth.

PREDICTION: After ANTM Cycle 11 is over, Tyra will have Sheena on The Tyra Banks Show for a Fake-Tits-Are-Baaaaaaaaaad story, we’ll go into the operating room with Sheena as she gets them taken out and Tyra holds her hand, telling her how “brave” she is, how beautiful she is on the inside and out, and how she’s a wonderful example to young girls everywhere.

*sighs and golf-claps*

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