DISGRASIAN™

DISGWITTER OF THE WEAK! Hailey Glassman

Hailey Glassman, Jon Gosselin’s jilted ex, tweeted a photo yesterday–obviously phony–of the “stubby” penis she shared with Kate Gosselin and a few other mediocre chicks. (Warning: DO NOT click the picture link if you throw up easily. Or if you’re at work.)





Let me first just say that as an admirer of fine penises, I am deeply offended by this photo.

And then I will add to that statement that CALLING YOUR FORMER RIDE “NASTY” SIMPLY SHOWS THAT YOU ARE WILLING TO SETTLE AND SMOOSH YOUR MOIST ORIFICES ON A SAD, HIDEOUS DICK. Such a statement shames you far more than the owner of said penis–he didn’t have a choice.

Augh, what a wicked game Glassman is playing. It’s a contest in which nobody wins. Especially not me. I feel like I need to take a shower and watch some good porn to wash this sad image away. Or borrow my friend’s copy of Guys Gone Wild. Or my sister’s old Playgirls.

Jeez, did I ever really think that Jon Gosselin was the biggest fame whore of this bunch?

[via ONTD]
[THR: Hailey Glassman Posts Alleged Jon Gosselin Penis Photo on Twitter]

Source

Filed under: 15 Minutes of Fame, Airing Dirty Laundry, DISGWITTER, Famewhore Twitterers, Hailey Glassman, Hideous Dicks, Horrific Images, Jon Gosselin, Jon Gosselin's "Stubby" Penis, Kate Gosselin, Magic Weiner, Mediocre Chicks, Shameful Behavior, Shameful Sex Acts, Small Penis Jokes, Small Penises, Trash Talking, Tweets, Twitter

DISGWITTER OF THE WEAK! Michael Ian Black Ruvs A Good Raugh

Tweeted this week by funnyguy Michael Ian Black:

Ha ha ha!

Yeah, we can. But why stop there?

Can’t we all set aside our differences for one minute and agree, as humans, that Michaer Ian Brack peaked during The State?

[Michael Ian Black on Twitter]

Source
Thanks, Jasmine and Qbertplaya!

Filed under: Accents, Career Peaks, Comics, DISGWITTER, Engrish, Meh, Michael Ian Black, Still Trying, The State, Unfunny, Unfunny Douchebags

DISGWITTER OF THE WEAK! Tila Tequila’s Alter Ego, “Jane”

At what point can we say that Twitter’s jumped the shark? When your boss joins? When your mom joins?

How about when your alter ego starts Tweeting, as was the case yesterday with Tila Tequila?

The Twitter account of Tila, who has professed to suffer from Dissociative Identity Disorder (aka Multiple Personality Disorder), was hijacked briefly Monday by one of her alters, “Jane.” Tila’s describes Jane on her MySpace page as “crazy” and someone who “always wants to kill me.”

(Then again, after the Twitter-jacking, she also called Jane her “Sasa Fierce” [sic] and boasted that she had her alter ego 10 years before Beyoncé “came wit that,” so, uh, Jane also appears to be a career asset.)

And what else did we learn about Jane yesterday?

Continue reading DISGWITTER OF THE WEAK! Tila Tequila’s Alter Ego, “Jane”

Filed under: Alter Egos, Celebrity Twitterers, DISGWITTER, Dissociative identity Disorder, I Am... Sasha Fierce, Jumping the Shark, Multiple Personality Disorder, Tila Tequila, Tila Tequila Alter Ego, Tila Tequila Jane, Tila Tequila Twitter

DISGWITTER OF THE WEAK! UCLA’s Randall Carroll

In honor of our site redesign, we present a new, semi-regular feature on dumbassery we’re calling “DISGWITTER of the Weak.” Disgwitter, as in the stupid Tweets people who should know better end up posting anyway. Our first victim perpetrator? UCLA freshman football player, Randall Carroll.

Over the weekend, wide receiver Carroll got busted for bitching on Twitter about his offensive coordinator, Coach Norm Chow, to a top high school recruit. It was reported by the LA Times that Carroll, who was heavily recruited himself, used a “racial epithet” to describe Chow.  The Times reposted this edited version of Carroll’s Tweet (after his account was quickly deleted):

“man oregon, stanford and cal should have been easy wins ,, but [expletive] thys [racial slur] norm chow dnt be trustin us ,, so it is what it is.”

We kinda naturally assumed that the slur Carroll, who is black, directed at Chow, who is of Chinese descent, was “chink.”

Well, not exactly.

Continue reading DISGWITTER OF THE WEAK! UCLA’s Randall Carroll

Filed under: African-Americans, Chinese-Americans, College Football, DISGWITTER, Media Hype, Norm Chow, Overblown Stories, Racial Epithets, Racial Slurs, Randall Carroll, Tweets, Twitter, UCLA Football