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Asians love bling, and Asians love gadgets.
What do we do when our gadgets get blinged?
Well, some of us put the $200k gold-and-(hopefully green)diamond gadget on our birthday wish list, especially since our birthday is coming up in less than a month. Then we drop casual hints to our close friends (Hi, Jen!), family members (Hi, Dad!), co-workers (Hi, Jasmine!), and gents (Hi Marty/Chaz/Morridge/Laphonz/RabbiBerg/Ned/Maz/JohnCho/Blaine/Buddy/Billy/Bob/BillyBob/RyanGosling!) to start saving up.
Clock’s a-tickin’. Not trying to be pushy here, though! Just stating the facts! Uh, clock’s a-tickin’.
Filed under: $200, 000 Diamond-Dipped Blackberry, Alexander Amosu, Asians And Their Unholy Obsession with Gadgets, Birthday Presents, Blackberry, Bling, Diamonds, I WANT I WANT I WANT, Shameless Materialism
Or, to be more clear, “Western” dudes.
According to the CNN report, female cafe owner Yuki Hirohata came up with the concept by walking the streets of Tokyo’s Shibuya ward. Two hundred women told her that they wanted a cafe where the waiters were all “male, good looking, treated them nice, but most importantly, were Western.”
“‘Being a gentleman is embarrassing for Japanese men,’ says cafe owner Yuki Hirohata. ‘Our culture isn’t like that.’ Hirohata says women are exhausted by the rules of Japanese society, unyielding in its expectations of a woman’s role in maintaining a career, home, husband, and family.
‘We’re tired from our daily lives,’ says [a] customer. ‘These guys are different from Japanese men. They’re smoother, and make me feel special.’“
Um, what the hell is going on? First of all, everybody knows the whole “princess” thing is tired and requires far more than a cheap tiara and some tea (get me DIAMONDS! AND GOWNS! AND SOME PEACOCKS!) to be properly executed.
Moreover, are we gonna sit back and let a bunch of sleazy expats take all the credit for gentlemanly behavior? COME ON, bros! Time to step it up! Let’s (you) open some doors, and pull out some chairs, and pour some champagne, and put some caviar on blini with some creme fraiche and egg whites! And how about some sexy tunes? And how about taking the dog out while we’re (you’re) at it?
All of this is not hard and I know there are gentlemen among you…so step it up and hold on to our ladies! This is a matter of pride.
…Especially cuz, er, the bar for chivalry actually seems pretttttty low.
Not sure what to get Moms on Mother’s Day? How about some CHING-BLING?
It and other such Hello Kitty baubles are brought to you by one of our fave DISGRASIANS…
Alrighty, now I’m off to flog myself.