You are currently browsing posts tagged with Crazy Faces
Caption This: Hillary Clinton’s Crazy-Faced Namaste
HRC busting with the anjali mudra before the arrival of Indian Prime Minister Manmohan Singh at the White House, November 24, 2009:
Filed under: Crazy Faces, Hillary Clinton, HRC, India Prime Minister Singh State Visit, Manmohan Singh, Namaste, Prayer Hands, President Barack Obama, Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, Signs of Respect
Thanks, Bobby Trendy!
Hi Bobby!
Great AMAs aesthetic.
We have been dying for you to cover your shit up for years. And now, look! You look fabulous!!! And FIERCE! Never better.
Lady BoBo
Keep up the good work! Don’t stop it if it’s workin’.
xoxo,
DISGRASIAN
Filed under: AMAs, American Music Awards, Awards Shows, Bizarre Sartorial Choices, Bobby Trendy, Cover-Up, Crazy Faces, Face, Famous-For-Nothings, Good Moves, Photo Op Victims, Red Carpet Whores, Shit On Your Face, Ugh, What Does This Person Have To Do WIth Music?
Asian Gracefully, Sorta
Apropos of nothing, Jennifer Tilly (née Jennifer Chan) is 50. I saw her on a sexiest women over 50 list recently (#3!) and learned this little fact (she turned quinquagenarian in September). So when I look at these photos taken of her at some event this week…
I have to give it up to this ageless lady–crazy face, tranny weave, and asymmetrical boobage notwithstanding.
Filed under: 50 Years Old, Aging Gracefully, Anti-Agin' Asian, Crazy Faces, Jennifer Tilly, Poker, Quinquagenarians, Tranny Weaves, Women Poker Players, Wonky Tits, Wow, Y'all All Need Anti-Asian Cream
Crowning Around
The reigning Miss Washington, Elyse Umemoto, has been getting a lot of flack over a couple of racy candid photos that leaked on the Internets this week. TMZ called her “a bad apple,” the Miss Washington Scholarship Organization said they were “embarassed by the pictures,” and the pageant queen (whose term ends this Saturday) issued a public apology today.
Quite the brouhaha. Them’s must be some dangerous pictures! So what’s all the fuss about, really?
We took a look at the snapshots and have delivered an assessment on Umemoto’s real crimes below.
Umemoto and friend flipping off cameraCRIMES: Ungraceful bend of index finger, wearing stupid pageant crown in public.
Umemoto and friend suggestively licking a bottle of Malibu rum
Umemoto and friend making obscene finger gesturesCRIMES: Purple eyeshadow and lurex top, fraternizing with actual frat boys. Also: if you’re gonna front that you like cooch-licking, don’t waste time with the peace sign. Use a cooch.
Shirtless Umemoto with friend, in the mirror
Umemoto suggestively close to friend
Umemoto with friend and curling iron
Filed under: An Apple A Day Clearly Does Nothing, Boring People, Cooch-Licking, Crazy Faces, Elyse Umemoto, Miss Washington, Pageants Are a Joke, Shaming the Crown, The Finger, Who Cares?
THE INSANITY BAROMETER: Yokoooooooooooooooooooooo
There’s something strangely comforting about seeing a 74 year-old woman still lettin’ it all hang out and practicing Primal Scream Therapy, but then again, when that woman is Yoko Ono, pictured here at the Tokyo premiere of “The U.S. Versus John Lennon,” it’s also kinda fuckin’ scary:
“Snowfling, snowfall, snowfall, listen, listen, listen!!!”
Insanity Barometer, goin’ up!
Filed under: Crazians, Crazy Faces, John Lennon, Primal Scream Therapy, Yoko Has a Strange Power Over Me That I Can't Describe
THE INSANITY BAROMETER: Ass Fascinasian
Whose nasty ass is this? A tranny hooker on Santa Monica and Vine? Paris Hilton headed to the gym? Dennis Rodman on his way to a baby shower? Amy Fisher on a bad day?
Oh god, it’s Naomi. GIRL! SUPERMODELS ARE SUPER. SUPERMODELS DON’T DO THIS. THEY DON’T, THEY DON’T, THEY DON’T. YOU NEED TO STOP. STOP BEFORE IT’S TOO LATE. OH GOD, IT’S ALREADY TOO LATE.
Insanity Barometer, going high against the sky, so high it almost touches the sky!
Filed under: Ass, Crazy Faces, Insanity, Models, Naomi Campbell, Personal Lows
DISGRASIAN OF THE WEAK! The Dalai Lama Foundation
We get it: The Dalai Lama is hip. The Dalai Lama is cool. The Dalai Lama is Hollywood.
Don’t get us wrong– We love His Holiness so very much. Hell, we’ve busted China’s chops in his defense.
Our ears perked up when we found out that this week, we could actually buy the official car of the 14th Dalai Lama on eBay, for the minimum bid of $75k. How bitchin’ would that be?!? We imagine that somehow its peaceful vibes could remedy one’s road rage, and probably make that person’s skin look great (this is not confirmed).
So we started digging into our annual Chanel clothing fund and got ready to make a bid. Why not? We’re writers; We could totally benefit from some fresh air and off-roading in a holy vehicle.
And then we looked more closely at The Dalai Lama Foundation’s latest auction: the *bonus* to your buy? A meet-and-greet with this botox-faced wacko:
Er, we’d rather have a date with her facialist. Jen and I have no space in our lives to visit with the woman who pioneered the modern age for an upskirt epidemic, in honor of peace.
Guess we’ll have to stick to raging in the Volvo. Oh well. We enjoy it.
Filed under: Crazy Faces, Ebay, Embarrassing, His Holiness, Non-Profit Ventures That Make Us Feel Cheep, Retarded Tingles, Road Rage, Sharon Stone, The Dalai Lama
THE INSANITY BAROMETER: A Bai Week
On days like this…
…when Bai is making a relatively normal face, has her 45-year old body looking bangin’, lets her hair stay neatly placed, and only allows an astronomically hideous dress ruin the frame–should I be grateful?
I mean, yeah.
Insanity Barometer… plateaued!
Filed under: Bai Ling Is Endless Fodder, Crazy Faces, Good Days, Insanity, Ugly Dresses
THE INSANITY BAROMETER: Chyna, We Have A Problem
“Hey world! Chyna’s back… back again… got some work done… tell a friend! Hello. HELLO!? HELLLLLLOOOOOOOOOO. I’ve got lucite platforms and a tight pair of legs and my face almost looks like a woman’s! Don’t you recognize me? I’m the 9th wonder of the world! I’m a world wrestling champion! I AM CHYNA HEAR ME ROAR!!!”
Insanity barometer… goin’ up!
Filed under: Attention Whores, Awkward Moments, Chyna, Crazy Faces, Lucite, Stupid Names, Wrestlers
THE INSANITY BAROMETER
“So you’re saying that to succeed in Hollywood I need to speak in full sentences, dress appropriately, and sing in key? Is this some kind of joke?*”
*Of COURSE it’s a joke. This is Hollywood, Butterface. If you want us to notice you, show us your cooch! Say something like “I’m a little bad, hee hee!” and “Fame is hard” “I don’t really try to be a sex symbol” and “There’s pressure to be thin” and “I love the Ivy because of the food, y’know?”
Filed under: Butterfaces, Coochie Coochie Cooch, Crazy Faces, Dontcha Wish You Cared?, Lacking Talent, Nicole Scherzinger
You’re Asian Fast
GODDAMN YOU Access Hollywood!! You damn near killed me with this headline:
But now that I think about it…
…I kind of see how it could work.
Filed under: 21? Homegirl Looks 80, Crazy Faces, Grandmas, Hooray--Sir Ben Kingsley is One of Us, Weird On-Screen Kisses, Young Hollywood
I am Happy, Oh so Happy
Perhaps in an effort to compete with her nemesis replacement ex-husband’s girlfriend Vanessa Minnillo’s crazy face:
Jessica Simpson did her best to rock the crazy with an assortment of retahded nerdbombalicious scary spastic happy poses at the recent launch of her swimline.
“I’m so glad that Nick has moved on!”
“Her boobs look great in that bikini… better than that little slut did while she was getting banged from behind by my husband.”
“What, me worry? I’m still relevant! People want to buy my cheap shoes, swimwear, and ugly hair extensions! I’m a catch! I can have any man I want!”
“I think Ashlee just lost another pound and Adam Levine just texted me to ‘leave him the fuck alone.’ I’m a has-been with no style and a flabby rack. Maybe Ken Paves will screw me.”Filed under: Crazy Faces, Fading Into Obscurity, Irrelevance, Jessica Simpson, Low-rentitude, Nick Lachey, Regretting the Day You Laid Legs on Johnny Knoxville, Talentless White Girls, Vanessa Minnillo, Weaves
