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In all of my three decades of life, I have never once been skinny.
Now–before you get all up in my grill with the, “Ohmygawd Diana, you’re NOT fat” words of soothing or the “You bitch, don’t talk to me about not being skinny” words of annoyance, please know that I’m not fishing for compliments, nor complaining about my size, nor stating I’ve never been a healthy, normal weight. I’m just saying, I’ve never been skinny.
But Asian girls are supposed to be skinny, right?
That’s like, the Asian girl thing: “Oh gosh, I just eat and eat and eat but I can’t gain any weight.” And “Urggg–they ran out of size zeros.” And “I was the skinniest person on my softball team in high school and I always hated it.” And “I can’t believe it, Yennie and I both hit three-digit weights over the holidays and we almost died!” Slight frames and narrow shoulders and bony hips and knobby knees and protruding ribs and flat asses and tiny breasts and slender thighs and stick arms. It’s our answer to the world’s Amazon legs and blonde waves and sexy curves. We’re skinny, betches.
Well, some of us.
Then there are the rest of us. We are sized 4, 6, 8, 14, 20. Medium and XXL. We do not eat whatever we want. Our clothes don’t “hang” on us. We cannot fathom wearing thigh-high boots. We have learned to like Diet Coke. We see photos of ourselves at weddings and realize that our arms are the same size as our cousins’ legs. We do not get lifted whimsically in the air by men. We have never liked our knees. We walk into an Asian supermall and watch them shake their heads–Your size we do not carry. We have Continue reading AMAZIAN OF THE WEEK! Lisa Lee And Lynn Chen’s “Thick Dumpling Skin”
Filed under: Anorexia, Blogs, Body Image, Community, Eating Disorders, Failure, Fat, Forums, Hardass Asian Grandmas, Healthy Weight, Hyphen, Let's talk about it, Lisa Lee, Lynn Chen, Maggie Q, Skinny Legs, Taboo, The Actor's Diet, Thick Dumpling Skin, Weight, Yunjin Kim
Loretta Sanchez, Blue Dog Dem incumbent representing California’s 47th Congressional District, would like to introduce her new web series*, How To Lose Votes And Alienate People. Here’s the first installation, pulled from a recent interview on Univisión’s Al Punto show:
Well shit, man. If I didn’t know any better, I’d venture that Sanchez’s eyebrows were–with an intensity–trying to cultivate a race war in Orange County. Those eyebrows betta hope this Vietnamese lady doesn’t come across them in a dark alley while packing Tweezerman Luxe Edition Swarovski® Crystal Slant® tweezers anytime soon. AND THAT IS NOT AN EMPTY THREAT!
*not an actual web series
Filed under: Anti-Latino, Blue Dog Democrats, Boat People, CA 47th Congressional District, Calling Immigrants Anti-Immigrant, Community, Congress, Don't Fuck With Jungle Asians, Drivel, Dumb Democrats, Dummyheads, Eyebrows That Frighten Me, Fools, Jungle Asians, Loretta Sanchez, Making Van Tran's Campaign Easy, Orange County, Race Wars, Really? There's No Better Option Than This Bitch?, The Vietnamese, Univision, Van Tran, Vietnamese Community, What If The Shoe Were On The Other Foot?, Xenophobia