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What It Means When North Korea Is Performing ‘Maintenance’ On Its Server

November 23rd, 2010 | 1 comment | Posted by Jen

This is what currently comes up on your screen when you visit “The Official Webpage of The Democratic People’s Republic of Korea”:

TRANSLATION: “The server is currently unable to handle the request due to a temporary unloading of ‘maintenance’ on the South Korean puppet group’s island territory. The implication is that this is a temporary condition that will be alleviated after our enrichment of enough uranium to bomb a bitch’s ass if we feel like it is completed.”

[Reuters: North Korea shells South in fiercest attack in decades]
[Official Website of North Korea]
[AP: Scientist: NKorea has 'stunning' new nuke facility]

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Boob Bomb?

May 13th, 2009 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!!


THEM BOOBS’S GONNA BLOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWW!!!

[Gizmodo: Japanese Marriage Bra Gently Nudges Men Toward Nuptials, With Boobs]

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Thanks, Jasmine!

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Yea or Naysian

July 21st, 2008 | 0 comments | Posted by Diana
“You know what? I am actually not that much into voting.
I think it’s kinda crazy that a woman is running, because I think that women deal with a lot of emotions and menopause and PMS and stuff. Like, I’m so moody all the time, I know I couldn’t be able to run a country…”
–Brooke Hogan, in a forthcoming episode of ‘Brooke Knows Best’

Dear Brooke,

Here’s the funny thing. I’m a woman, a woman dealing with a lot of emotions right now–not menopause, maybe PMS. I’m feeling totally nauseous and moody. Like, I’m looking at your face and I totally want to throw up. I’m reading about your nonchalance regarding voting and it’s putting me in a full-on bad mood. And in parsing through your idiotic assessment of why it’s crazy for a woman to be running for office… well, hell, it makes me so furious that I want to wage war on the Hogan family and bomb your ass.

Oh. Hunh. I guess that kinda makes me qualified to be President after all, huh?

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Bad F*ck Charm Addendum

December 30th, 2007 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen


2007 – After being blamed the world over for causing her current boy toy’s Tony “Roma” Romo’s worst NFL outing, Jessica Simpson brings bad fuck to her own box office. “Blonde Ambition,” a romantic comedy starring Simpson and Luke Wilson, opens the weekend before Christmas in extremely limited release (eight Texas movie theaters) and earns a whoppin’ $1,322, the exact cost of Simpson’s last botched lip job. Luke Wilson, meanwhile, makes a New Year’s resolution to never shoot another movie with a fellow Texan whose name doesn’t end in…”Wilson.”

To read the complete Bad Fuck Charm Timeline, click here.

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Thanks Greenie!

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62 Years Later

August 6th, 2007 | 0 comments | Posted by Diana

Today marks the 62nd Anniversary of the bombing on Hiroshima, and somehow the wounds burn as if they were fresh.

Have we forgotten?

The U.S. is still holding up our nuke-u-lar dicks. WHY?

We should forever feel ashamed.

For more, see the HBO doc White Light/Black Rain. To read more about the filmmaker Steven Okazaki, click on our friend Dana’s blog at The New Yorker.

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