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“Hello America! I’m Bobby Jindal, Governor of Louisiana. Perhaps you remember me from my awesomely bad Republican response to President Obama’s February 24 speech? I’ve been super busy in my home state lately–in fact, I just passed some cool new legislation, just this week! See, here’s the thing: all of us here around the office, we’d been thinking–there are lots of dummies around these parts, young adults that grow up unable to do hard stuff like add and read, and that makes us, like us-us, look bad. It’s like we have an educational problem or something.
So we solved it! This new legislation will allow kids to get into high school without taking some dumb, difficult standardized tests. And if somebody isn’t “feeling” high school, they can just get on the “career track” program and have easier requirements! They would’ve “slipped through the cracks” anyway, guys!
Phew! So it’s a win-win for all involved–we don’t need to improve the schooling, the students don’t need to improve themselves, and everyone looks better for it. Mediocrity has never tasted so good!”
Filed under: Bobby Jindal, Bobby Jindal Republican Response to Obama Speech, Career Track, Education, High School, Louisiana, Lowering the Bar, Mediocrity, Settling, Standardized Testing, Weird Louisianan Behavior
Bobby Jindal’s “Republican response” to President Obama’s address to Congress Tuesday night–which was billed as the Louisiana governor’s coming-out party–was universally panned by the left and right. Conservative columnist David Brooks–who is part Canadian and not given to hyperbole–called Jindal’s platitude-filled speech a “disaster,” “nihilism,” and “insane.” FOX News commentator Juan Williams said that Jindal sounded “childish” and spoke in a “sing-songy” voice. And now the entire interwebz has a new meme: Bobby Jindal is Kenneth the Page from 30 Rock.