DISGRASIAN™

DISGRASIAN OF THE YEAR! 10 People And/Or Things From ’10 We Hope Will Get Dick Cancer

[Ed. note--this post was written in advance of the tragic shooting that occurred on Saturday, Jan. 8 in Arizona. Our thoughts go out to those affected by those events.]

We talked a lot in the closing months of last year how 2010 was BALLS. And you know why it was balls? Because it was a year ruled by DICKS. Dickheads, dickweeds, dickwads, dicktwits, dickfaces, cheesedicks, needledicks, pencil dicks, limp dicks, and a various assortment of Dick Tracies, seemed to poke their, ahem, heads out from all sides. It was actually hard to come up with only 10 Dicks From ’10 because the year was so chock-full of cocksmokers. But somehow, after a little dicking around, we did.

And here they are, 2010′s Most Dickstinguished:


THE PALIN FAMILY

WHY THEY’RE DICKS: Everywhere we turned in 2010, there was another story about somebody named Palin being a dick. There was Todd Palin writing angry, poorly-punctuated emails. There was Willow Palin writing gay slur-slinging, poorly-punctuated Facebook comments. There was Bristol Palin being billed as a “teen activist” and dancing her way horribly to the Dancing With the Stars finals. And then there was Mama Grizzdick herself, Sarah Palin, who showed time and again that not only was she a dick, she was a Dick of All Trades–a refudiating dick, a 1st Amendment-confused dick, an Islamophobic dick, a book-shilling dick, a reality TV dick, a Tea Party dick, and, generally, an all-around fame-trolling dick of the highest magnitude. While it’s clear the Palins are gunning to be the First Family of the United States in 2012, for now, they can pat themselves on the backs for being, hands-down, the First Family of the United States of Dickbags.

OUR SOLUTION: The family of dicks that gets Dick Cancer together stays together. Another idea: JUST. GO. AWAY.

Continue reading DISGRASIAN OF THE YEAR! 10 People And/Or Things From ’10 We Hope Will Get Dick Cancer

Filed under: 2010 Sucked Ass, Arizona, Arizona SB 1070, BP, BP Oil Spill, Brett Favre, Brett Favre Cheats On Wife, Brett Favre Penis, Brett Favre Sad Weiner, Brett Favre Why Did You Come Back?, Bristol Palin, Cheaters, Decision Points, Dick Cancer, Don't Ask Don't Tell, Everything About the Palins Sucks Ass, George W. Bush, George W. Bush Decision Points, Gwyneth Paltrow, Gwyneth Paltrow Country Strong, Gwyneth Paltrow Sings, Hamburger Helper Helps a Hamburger Help Gwen Make A Great Mess, Jesse James, Jesse James Cheats On Sandra Bullock, Jesse James Nazi Photo, Jesse James PR Suicide, John McCain, Kat Von D, Michelle "Bombshell" McGee, North Korea, Sarah Palin, SB 1070, The Palins, Todd Palin, TSA, TSA Body Scanner

DISGRASIAN OF THE WEAK! Barry Wong

A Republican candidate running for the Arizona Corporation Commission, which regulates public utility companies (among other responsibilities), has proposed a change in policy in the event of his election:

He wants to cut off utilities for residences of illegal immigrants.

From The Arizona Republic:

Serving a growing number of people with power, he said, raises utility rates because it requires building new power plants. He said asking utilities not to serve illegal immigrants could protect other ratepayers from utility hikes…

“…I’m sure there will be criticism about human-rights violations,” Wong said of his utility proposal. “Is power or natural gas or any type of utility we regulate, is that a right that people have? It is not a right. It is a service.”

Declaring oneself  anti-immigrant seems to be increasingly en vogue in Arizona, and critics have accused Wong of making these controversial remarks, targeting illegal immigrants, in order to win votes. (It should be noted that Arizona’s commission is one of the few in the United States to employ elected officials.) Funnily enough, even the most vocal anti-immigrant politicians in the state have shied away from Wong’s ideas. Wong of course denies making his claims purely for election buzz, saying, “”I don’t need to take on these issues for election purposes. I served on the Corporation Commission.”

Perhaps the most shameful part of such accusations is that they’re even plausible. When did a lack of humanity become a pathway to power?

OH WAIT. SINCE THE BEGINNING OF TIME.

Source
Thanks, Jasmine and Henri!

Filed under: Anti-Immigrant, Arizona, Arizona Corporation Commission, Arizona SB 1070, Barry Wong, Denying Illegal Immigrants Utilities, Humanity, Republicans, Stupid Proposals, This is Bullshit, Utilities

Why I Won’t Be Spending My Summer Vacation In Arizona: Governor Claims Most Illegals Are ‘Drug Mules’

Arizona governor Jan Brewer doesn’t know what an illegal immigrant looks like, but she knows what “the majority” of them are up to–why, they’re all drug mules, of course! According to CNN, Governor Brewer made this claim earlier this month during a debate of Republican gubernatorial candidates, and then she reiterated it again last Friday:

“Well, we all know that the majority of the people that are coming to Arizona and trespassing are now becoming drug mules,” Brewer said. “They’re coming across our borders in huge numbers. The drug cartels have taken control of the immigration.

“So they are criminals. They’re breaking the law when they are trespassing and they’re criminals when they pack the marijuana and the drugs on their backs.”

In other words, they’re weedbacks!

But here’s the thing: what Governor Brewer’s claiming isn’t true. (Shocking, I know.) It’s just another lie coming out of what is quickly becoming the most fascist and racist place in America. A representative for the National Border Patrol Council, the labor union for almost 20,000 border patrol agents and staff, which actually supports SB 1070, disputed Brewer’s claim as soon as she made it, saying that drugs smuggled across the border by Continue reading Why I Won’t Be Spending My Summer Vacation In Arizona: Governor Claims Most Illegals Are ‘Drug Mules’

Filed under: Anti-Immigration, Arizona, Arizona Governor Jan Brewer, Arizona Immigration Bill SB 1070, Arizona Immigration Law, Arizona SB 1070, Blaming Brown People For Your Problems, Boycott Arizona, Drug Mules, Governor Brewer, Illegal Immigrants, Illegal Immigration, Immigration Reform, Is Arizona The Most Fucked Place In America?, Jan Brewer, Lies, Racist Laws

AMAZIAN OF THE WEEK! The Asian Pacific American Legal Center And The Asian American Justice Center

Name: The Asian Pacific American Legal Center (APALC) and the Asian American Justice Center (AAJC)

Location: Los Angeles and D.C., respectively

Purpose: Civil rights groups

Known for: Joining the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU), the Mexican American Legal Defense and Educational Fund (MALDEF), and the National Assn. for the Advancement of Colored People (NAACP) in filing a lawsuit against Arizona’s SB 1070 Monday. The suit contends that the law will lead to racial profiling and is in violation of the 1st, 4th, and 14th Amendments. One of the plaintiffs this coalition is representing is 70 year-old Jim Shee, a U.S.-born citizen of Spanish and Chinese descent, who has already been stopped twice by Arizona law enforcement officials and asked to produce his papers, even before the law’s taken effect.

In light of AZ Governor Brewer accusing President Obama of “(dividing) people along racial lines for his personal political convenience” by opposing SB 1070, it’s telling that the exact opposite is happening. Because this law isn’t just a threat to a certain race, it’s a threat to the Constitution, our civil liberties, and the things that actually hold our society together. ACLU attorney Lucas Guttentag put it best when he described SB 1070 this way:

“This is the most extreme and dangerous of all the state and local laws purporting to deal with immigration issues. This law is shameful, un-American.“

[LA Times: Civil rights groups sue to stop Arizona's immigration law]
[The Asian Pacific American Legal Center]
[The Asian American Justice Center]

Source

Filed under: Anti-Immigration, Arizona, Arizona Immigration Bill SB 1070, Arizona SB 1070, Asian American Justice Center, Asian Pacific American Legal Center, Boycott Arizona, Civil Liberties, Civil Rights, Governor Jan Brewer, Governor Jan Brewer Is a Fucking Idiot, Hispanics, Illegal Immigration, Latinos, Racist Laws, SB 1070, Solidarity

SPORTS ILLUSTRASIAN: Viva Los Suns

You know there’s something seriously fucked going on in Arizona when people who dribble a ball for a living demonstrate a better understanding of the law there than the people who came up with the law in the first place.

Grant Hill *swoon*

As you may know, the Phoenix Suns wore their “Los Suns” jerseys Wednesday during Game 2 of their playoff series against the San Antonio Spurs–who also tried to wear “Los Spurs” jerseys but could not get them in time–to not only celebrate Cinco de Mayo, but to protest Arizona’s anti-immigration law SB 1070 and show solidarity for Latinos in their community. Before the game, Suns point guard Steve Nash, who is Canadian, spoke out against the law on ESPN’s Pardon the Interruption:

I’m against it. I think this is a bill that really damages our civil liberties, I think it opens up potential for racial profiling and racism. I think that it’s a bad precedent to set for young people. I think it represents our state poorly in the eyes of the nation and the world.

BANG. That’s like a classic late-in-the-game Steve Nash shot from behind the arc that Continue reading SPORTS ILLUSTRASIAN: Viva Los Suns

Filed under: Alabama, Anti-Immigration, Anti-Immigration Law, Arizona Immigration Bill SB 1070, Arizona Immigration Law, Arizona SB 1070, Basketball, Canadians Are Nice, Charles Barkley, Cinco de Mayo, Governor Jan Brewer, Grant Hill, Immigrant Haters, Latinos, Los Suns, NBA, Phoenix Suns, Racial Profiling, Racism, Racist Laws, SB 1070, Steve Nash

This Is America, Speak English (Unless You’re FOX News)

For a nation of immigrants, America’s fast becoming a country of self-haters.

You see this not only in an anti-immigration law like Arizona’s recently-passed SB 1070, but also in the “This is America, speak English” movement that’s been rearing its ugly head all over the country lately.

Teabaggers everywhere are saying you better learn it if you want to live here.

Alabama GOP gubernatorial candidate Tim James is saying you better learn it if you want to drive here (see below).

And the Arizona Department of Education is saying you not only better learn it if you want to teach here, you better speak it without a foreign accent, comprende?

But look. Is it such a terrible idea to get rid of people in this country who can’t speak, read, or write in our unofficial official language? I know, I know, it sounds crazy. And racist. And fascist. And, um, racist? But what would you say if I proposed we start here:

Continue reading This Is America, Speak English (Unless You’re FOX News)

Filed under: Alabama, Alabama Gubernatorial Candidate Tim James, Arizona, Arizona Bans English Teachers with Accents, Arizona Bans Ethnic Studies, Arizona Immigration Bill SB 1070, Arizona Immigration Law, Arizona SB 1070, Fox News, FOX News is a Joke, Racism, Speak English, Tea Party Conventions, Teabaggers, This Is Alabama We Speak English, This Is America Speak English

On SB 1070 And What Happens When “Brown” Means “Illegal”

What does an illegal immigrant look like?

From the Young Conservatards of Texas’ “Capture an Illegal Immigrant Day” in 2005

Arizona Governor Jan Brewer, who just signed SB 1070 into law last Friday–which allows law enforcement to stop and demand ID of anyone they have “reasonable suspicion” is illegal–has no idea.

And yet, isn’t that the premise of this law? That you have to know what “illegal” looks like? Provision 1 of SB 1070 requires:

Continue reading On SB 1070 And What Happens When “Brown” Means “Illegal”

Filed under: Anti-Immigrant, Anti-Immigration, Anti-Immigration Law, Arizona Immigration Law, Arizona SB 1070, Breathing While Brown, Chicanos, Colorism, Governor Jan Brewer, Hispanics, Illegal Immigrants, Illegal Immigration, Latinos, Mexican-Americans, Mexico, Racism, Racist Law, Reasonable Suspicion, SB 1070