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Cadillac, The Car Of Choice For Philanderers And Wife-Beaters

October 19th, 2010 | 1 comment | Posted by Jen

First Tiger Woods, now Junior Seau…what is it about the Cadillac Escalade that makes it the perfect getaway car for men involved–allegedly–in domestic disputes?

Seau’s Escalade Escapade

Seau, who was arrested Sunday night on suspicion of domestic violence committed against his 25 year-old live-in girlfriend, drove his 3-ton SUV off a seaside cliff a few hours after the arrest. The NFL veteran came away from the accident with minor injuries and reportedly told police that he had fallen asleep at the wheel. His agent, Mike Kinkler, told ESPN that the arrest and the accident were unrelated.

“One had nothing to do with the other,” Kinkler said. “It’s unfortunate the two events happened so close together, but what people are reporting is completely untrue.”

Uh-huh. That’s what Tiger said.

This can’t possibly help the reputation of the Escalade as the douchemobile of choice, but it likely won’t hurt sales either, especially since Cadillac’s have soared 43.8% in the first nine months of this year. Because even philanderers and wife-beaters–alleged, that is–need a bumpin’ set of wheels.

[NY Times: Seau Is Injured in Crash Only Hours After Arrest]
[USA Today: Ex-wife: Junior Seau was not trying to kill himself when car plunged off cliff]

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Thanks, Aliah!

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Browning Around

March 5th, 2009 | 0 comments | Posted by Diana

News sources say that President Omar Al-Bashir of Sudan was spotted “smiling, dancing and speaking to a huge crowd of supporters Thursday, a day after a warrant was issued for his arrest on war crimes charges.”

Okay, that’s one way to show humility in the face of abysmal accusations. Sheezus, maybe he and Chris Brown share a gene or something.

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Wow, Chris Brown

March 3rd, 2009 | 0 comments | Posted by Diana

Is this what “I’m ashamed about my involvement in a highly publicized domestic violence dispute that allegedly left my girlfriend with a split lip and giant welts all over her face–and can’t believe all of this went down before I’d even been alive for two decades” looks like?

Brown, contemplating his fate in Florida

Hunh. I had no idea.

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