Seven Steps To Being A Perfect Gentlemasian Like Hines Ward

May 6th, 2011 | 3 comments | Posted by Diana

Step 1: SMILE. Smile when you’re mad, smile when you’re sad, smile when you’re pissed, smile when you’ve been kissed.

Step 2: Always think of the children.

Step 3: Love yo’ mama.

Step 4: Attempt to balance out the shame of your friend or teammate’s shameful antics by doing cool stuff, like getting appointed by your cool president to be on a cool advisory commission.

Step 5: Be light on your feet and smooth in your hips.

Step 6: Win whenever possible.

and…

Step 7: If you and a friend are held up at gunpoint by NoHo police due to a mix-up regarding said friend’s Honda Civic, which was mistakenly reported stolen, cooperate like a stand-up citizen. Never devolve into a self-aggrandized asshole jerk that says, “Do you know who I am? Do you know who I am? You wanna how many Super Bowl rings I got, ya fuckin’ pig?? I’m gonna go all James Harrison on your ass!” AND after the incident is cleared up, say nice things to the media about how everything was just a big misunderstanding and the officers involved were just trying to do their job. AW. AWWWWW.

[HuffPo: Hines Ward Held At Gunpoint, Handcuffed In Police Misunderstanding]

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3 Responses to “Seven Steps To Being A Perfect Gentlemasian Like Hines Ward”

  1. I gotta give it to him for always being professional. Love him. LOVE HIM! But then I’m bias when it comes to anyone korean and black like my son :)

  2. msmargie says:

    Love Hines Ward. Love class acts in general. But isn’t it kind of sad that class acts seem to be the exception rather than the rule? And that douche bags seem to get all the attention? Thanks for shining some light on some fantabulous Amasians.

  3. TruePhillyCheeseSteak says:

    Hines Ward, all-Blasian American hero.

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