February 24th, 2011 | 3 comments | Posted by Diana

Happy birthday, Steve Jobs! You’re 56 today, and we truly hope that the efforts to get you healthy again are fruitful. Our thoughts are with you.

After all, where would we be without you?

Without Macs, Jen and I wouldn’t have a nearly 4-year old blog together. Have you ever tried blogging? It’s very often thankless, exhausting, insecurity-inducing, frustrating, time-consuming, tedious, mind-imploding. Try adding a PC into that mix. All that shit multiplies exponentially.

Without iPhones, Jen and I would never have exchanged a single text. Before she got an iPhone, she lived off a landline, and never picked up her cell phone because it “wasn’t charged.” When she was iPhoneless, I was never able to text her–as I always do now–that I was running 5/10/15/45 minutes late for lunch. And she would get mad. So mad. Enough years of that nonsense, and our friendship would never have lasted long enough to add a web project, y’dig?

Without iTunes, it would have been impossible to blow out the epic parties Jen and I have thrown together. It would also have made pot brownies way less fun. And no-pants dance parties would have just been dull hangouts in leotards.

Without the iPad, I would not have a super low-profile cover for my deep, dark addiction to Harlequin romance novel eBooks. I read and read and read about thrusting and throbbing members and nipple licking and marriage proposals, all while telling people I’m playing Angry Birds or reading Shock Doctrine. And NO ONE KNOWS I’M JUST READING SMUT! I can even do such reading at family functions. YES! FAMILY FUNCTIONS!

So you see? iNeed you–we need you–you wild computer sorcerer that owns our souls, eats up our dispensable income, and updates our operating systems with really ungodly fixes and bugs (Why would any iPad user prefer a mute button to a screen lock button, I ask you? Why?). Anyway, have a happy birthday and please get well soon.

Diana and Jen

[Wikipedia: Steve Jobs]


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3 Responses to “BIRTHDAY CELEBRASIAN! Steve Jobs”

  1. [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Jasmine D, Jasmine Davila. Jasmine Davila said: RT @disgrasian BIRTHDAY CELEBRASIAN! Steve Jobs [...]

  2. isaacakira says:

    I just think Steve Jobs is a 21st version of Bill Gates. Or Dark Vader.

  3. Diana says:

    “Dark Vader.” CUTE!

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