Charice’s Face-Off

July 19th, 2010 | 11 comments | Posted by jasmine

From Guest Contributor, Intern Jasmine:

When I heard Pinaysian singing sensasian Charice was going to be guest-starring on Glee, I was stoked. She’s young, she’s cute, she can sang, and Oprah loves her. On the show, she could form a Voltron-like Asian power triumvirate with Jenna “Tina Cohen-Chang” Ushkowitz and Harry “Mike Chang/Other Asian” Shum, Jr.

So I was surprised – okay, shocked – when I heard that Charice, in preparation for her Glee debut, in some Botox and a skin-tightening treatment called Thermage. In a press conference with her cosmetologist, who performed the Thermage on her on camera, Charice confessed to wanting “to look fresh on camera” for the show.

Yeah, because we all know how fucking haggard 18 year old girls can look.

Doctor Vicki Belo explained:

“Charice’s face, I’ve been noticing, it’s been getting wider… That’s why she looks mataba, although the body is very small, because [her] face is getting wide. One of the reasons for that, nagchew-chewing gum [siya]… Our chewing muscles, if you chew a lot of gums, it gets bigger.”

So what she’s saying is that Charice’s adorable Asian moon face, supposedly the result of excessive gum-chewing, is so wide that it’s making the rest of her look fat. Clearly, it’s a threat that must be contained.

If that widening face isn’t stopped with the intervention of shots of botulism and a procedure that melts collagen IN YOUR FACE, it will get so wide that Charice won’t be able to fit through doorways without turning to the side. She’ll have to reserve three seats on the plane to the States to film her scenes for Glee. Show creator Ryan Murphy will have to shoot with extra-wide lenses to accommodate her ginormous jaw, which will block everything else in view. Which may not be so bad because, let’s face it, sometimes the choreography on the show is kinda wack anyway.

[Yahoo! News: Teenage singer Charice gets Botox for 'Glee' debut]

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11 Responses to “Charice’s Face-Off”

  1. mike says:

    Man, this really bummed me out. It’s just sad all-around and I hope Charice doesn’t go too far down this path of unnecessary cosmetic surgery. So many young girls look up to her… reminds me of when I found out Jackie Chan got eye surgery.

  2. PoweredByRice says:

    So she chews gum so much that she has huge jaw muscles???

    Ok, there’s another joke here that is begging to be made, but I won’t go there…..

  3. Jen says:

    Oh boy.

  4. cDonnaF says:

    I’ve got to remember not to read this blog right before I go to bed. Between this, the Forever 21 maternity clothes, and Sarah “Disgrace to the [human] race” Palin, I’ve got a rage headache.
    I guess at 18 Charice is techically a legal adult. But I have a daughter who’s 17. And any freakin’ doctor or publicist or anyone telling my daughter that her face isn’t good enough would be thrown out the door SO FAST– Argh.

  5. Jen says:

    @cDonnaF Yeah, the rage headache is kind of a recreational hazard here at DISGRASIAN HQ.

  6. [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Jasmine D and Anna Rice, jasminedavila. jasminedavila said: RT @disgrasian Charice’s Face-Off [...]

  7. tifguevara says:

    Uh-oh…Belo’s got her hands on Charice.

  8. weissman says:

    wasn’t it latter stated that the injections were for jam pain, a lot more resonable explanation

  9. Jen says:

    @weissman Sounded like damage control spin to me, especially since in the interview above she says she wants to look “fresh” for the cam.

  10. ButtaFlyy says:

    This is a total disaster!!! She was (and still is) gorgeous, and now she’s totally loosing sight of the fact she is now an inspiration to Asian girls of all decents to become whatever they want with no regrets. She is being totally transformed into your typical ‘Becky’ and I’m sure will have a sextape out soon to further her career even more. UGH!!!

  11. [...] last week’s catharsis that just happened to happen during my mid-year review? I got to write a blog post about Charice Pempengco getting Botox and Thermage for her appearance on “Glee” next season for [...]

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