You are currently browsing the archives for April, 2010

The Latest Case Of Yellowface: Mickey Rourke As Genghis Khan

Iron Man 2‘s Mickey Rourke revealed in an interview last week that he is set to play Mongol badass Genghis Khan in a biopic written by Apocalypse Now writer John Milius.

Now, this could be considered one of the most egregious examples in recent history of an actor in yellowface, IF you considered this…

…an actual face, that is.

[via Current via Cinematical]

[MTV Movies Blog: EXCLUSIVE: Mickey Rourke Says Genghis Khan Biopic 'Not Your Stereotypical Blood And Swords']

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Thanks, Klementine!

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WTF News: Third Attack On Chinese Schoolchildren In Three Days

Several people sent us the NY Times story, “Chinese Preschoolers Hurt in New Attack,” about the third violent attack on Chinese schoolchildren in the same amount of days, with the subject heading “WTF.”

A child hurt in Thursday’s attack

A timeline of the attacks, from the NYT:

On Wednesday, a 33-year-old ex-teacher with a history of mental illness stabbed 15 children at a primary school in Leizhou, in Guangdong Province.

On Thursday, a 47-year-old unemployed man stabbed 28 children and 3 adults at a kindergarten in Jiangsu Province, on China’s east coast just south of Shandong.

Continuing a bizarre series of attacks on Chinese schoolchildren, a man broke into a primary school in eastern China on Friday and beat five preschool children with a hammer before setting himself afire, the state-run Xinhua news agency reported.

WTF indeed.

The crimes are believed to be copycats of the March 23 knife attack at a school in Fujian Province that left eight children dead. The perpetrator of that attack, 42-year-old Zheng Minsheng, was executed, as it so happens, on Wednesday (they move fast like that in China). Both Zheng and Wednesday’s attacker, Chen Kangbing, had known histories of mental illness. Mental illness is still something that the country is in denial about (and, undoubtedly, ashamed over). From the same NYT piece:

Continue reading WTF News: Third Attack On Chinese Schoolchildren In Three Days

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DISGRASIAN OF THE WEAK! Our Beloved, Apple

Dear Geniuses at Apple,

It’s no secret that Jen and I are longtime members of your cult. We live the iLife and it feels good. Jen–who prefers a corded home phone (I know, I know) and doesn’t like to be put in a corner (aka reachable while on-the-go)–even has an iPhone. Do you realize what a coup that is? I got a text from her once and I fainted. Oh, Apple.

I don’t have an iPhone. I never have.  I like the tactile sensation of my dexterous thumbs on actual buttons, tippity-tappitying messages at a wild rate and sending them off with a flourish that people can not only see, but hear and feel. I love the clunk of a Blackberry. I love that I can drop it in my coffee without breaking my own heart (I once washed someone’s iPhone 3GS by accident and it ripped my soul to shreds). I mean, I live off of my phone, and I rest easier knowing that any malfunction/loss can be dealt with outside of the Genius Bar. You can have my heart, Apple, but you cannot have my phone.

At least that’s what I’ve been saying since June of 2007, when you first released the slick, zippy, fun-filled, multi-functional, who-needs-a-brain-to-work-this-incredible-gadget iPhone. Series after series I’ve watched pour from your beautifully austere stores, right into the pockets of each and every one of my friends and loved ones. My friend develops apps that I can’t use. My sister texts me emoticons that I can’t see. I stick out like a sore thumb at  rock shows when everyone starts recording and editing video with just a raise of their right arm and a swish of their finger. Still, I’ve held out. A lone ranger in a valley of touchscreen cattle.

But April 19, when excitement began to brew over the new super-secret iPhone prototype (apparently, the model meant to be released in a month) that got leaked and thoroughly dissected by the cool kids at Gizmodo, my ears perked up for the first time.

Continue reading DISGRASIAN OF THE WEAK! Our Beloved, Apple

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Float On

My family fled war-torn Vietnam in June of 1975 by secretly hopping aboard a freight ship meant to carry textiles. Someone tipped my mom’s brother off to the opportunity and he immediately rounded up the rest of the relatives. They hastily collected their meager belongings, then hustled to the dock. My family was joined by about 200 other people on the shore. The ship docked and everyone quietly boarded the ship, tucking themselves into the dark nooks, while dozens of jumbo bins were loaded onto the deck. The ship left shore once again, and after a number of miles some of the bins began to move, as 150 more people emerged from underneath. They all went to America.

Every time my mom and I talk about this particularly fascinating bit of their story, we clash over one point.

I say, “So that’s how you came here!”

She says, “Yes, we came on a boat.”

I say, “Right. So you were boat people that came–”

She cuts me off and shrieks, “WE ARE NOT BOAT PEOPLE!”

I say, “Didn’t we just talk about the boat you came on?”

She says, “It was a freight ship!”

I say, “Isn’t a ship a large boat?

Then she stops talking to me. Moms are so weird.

Today, I saw photos of those womb-rumbling cutie patooties Maddox and Pax Jolie-Pitt cruising coolly around the canals in a sweet speedboat:




…and all I could think was, “Mom! Boat people are so AWESOME!”

[via Popsugar]

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JOB LISTING: Design Under(Outer?)wear For Tila

TILA’S TAKING APPLICATIONS FOR HER “FASHION LINE!” Underoo designers, this could be your big break!

Sounds like the business lady has already figured out the first step to success: delegasian:

1) I already have everything taken care of so you dont [sic] have to worry about putting out money for anything. I of course am the CEO of this new fashion line, my [sic] appointed my sister as the President in Charge, and now we are giving people out there a chance to be a part of our team and become billionaires! No. I am not Kidding.

So listen, me and my sister are already getting the fabrics and coming up with the designs, however, this line is going to be very big so we need at least a few more designers on board!  So if you are an aspiring fashion designer, stylist, etc, well here is your chance to be a part of something massive!!!!

Here’s what you have to do for us to accept you into our team:

First of all this is my fashion line so it has to represent me. So I like stuff that is edgy, cutting edge, chic, sexy, not trashy or cheap looking, glamourous [sic], high fashion, outrageous, bedazzles, etc….. give me the best you got!!!!! Now instructions below on how u will be accepted to join my fashion team:

1) draw up sketches and designs of your most creative designs, what fabric, etc.

2) the more variety of ideas you can send us, the better so we can see what your style is.

Continue reading JOB LISTING: Design Under(Outer?)wear For Tila

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BIRTHDAY CELEBRASIAN! Joan Chen

Happy birthday to the beautiful and talented Joan Chen, who turned 49 (???!?!?!?!?) this week!

We can’t believe it’s been 20 years since we fell for Chen’s mysterious eyes on Twin Peaks. Here’s a vintage scene from Season 2 to remind you how she could singlehandedly inspire sexy fantasies with just a blink of her eyelashes:

Um. It’s possible that her skin actually got smoother and more radiant over the years. Does she only get more interesting and sultry? How can we do that?

[Wikipedia: Joan Chen]

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ROCK OF TEA PARTY NASIAN: Lisa Mei Norton

Have you heard about Lisa Mei Norton, right-wing Christian conservative country singer/songwriter?

America's rack!

She wants to keep her guns, finds Michelle Malkin and her ilk to be “smart,” thinks we’ve gone socialist, believes Obama wasn’t born here and loves to (tea) party. Oh, and she’s already working on the indoctrinasian of her six-year-old son. Translasian: She watches Fox News.

Check out her buzzword-laden Tea Party anthem, “A Revolution’s Brewing,” a lovely ditty for all 3,000 of those adorable, overly-acknowledged, grammatically-challenged teabaggers:

Continue reading ROCK OF TEA PARTY NASIAN: Lisa Mei Norton

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On SB 1070 And What Happens When “Brown” Means “Illegal”

What does an illegal immigrant look like?

From the Young Conservatards of Texas’ “Capture an Illegal Immigrant Day” in 2005

Arizona Governor Jan Brewer, who just signed SB 1070 into law last Friday–which allows law enforcement to stop and demand ID of anyone they have “reasonable suspicion” is illegal–has no idea.

And yet, isn’t that the premise of this law? That you have to know what “illegal” looks like? Provision 1 of SB 1070 requires:

Continue reading On SB 1070 And What Happens When “Brown” Means “Illegal”

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Oh, We Ru The Day You Left [Drag Race Spoiler Alert]

Oh Jujubee.




Ju have charisma.
Ju are unique.
Ju have got nerve.
Ju have talent!

Girl, ju may not have won Ru Paul’s Drag Race this season, but ju will always be the number one queen in our book (er, blog).

xoxo
DISGRASIAN

P.S. We still cannot believe you lost to that slow-talking bitch, Other Tyra. Honey, PLEASE!

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Thanks, jRu!

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She Didn’t Look Underage…

It was announced today that the International Olympics Committee has stripped China of a bronze medal from the women’s gymnastics team competition at the 2000 Sydney Games. Team member Dong Fangxiao was 14 at the time, making her two years shy of eligibility–and her individual scores contributed to the overall team score, earning them the medal.

The US team, who placed fourth, will now be awarded the bronze medal. All of Dong’s former teammates will be forced to turn in their medals.





I, for one, am… shocked.

But unfortunately–though she’s hardly the one responsible for fudging her age and competing illegally–she, for one, is scrrreeewwwed. If I were her, I would keep my eyes peeled for any approaching tiny females. Eep!

[CNN: China Stripped Of Medal; Gymnast Found To Be Underage]

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Thanks, Jasmine!

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Another Yale Murder (Sort Of)

Yale, we have a problem.

Lishan Wang

For the second time in a year, the name “Yale” has been linked to the word “murder.” On Monday, Dr. Vajinder Toor, 34, a fellow at the Yale School of Medicine, originally of New Delhi, was shot and killed outside his home in nearby Branford by Dr. Lishan Wang, 44, originally of Beijing. Branford police were quick to say that the murder was not “in any way related to Yale,” but–too late–the crime is already being billed as another “Yale Murder.” The NY Times reports that Wang worked under Toor in New York previously and was fired after a confrontation with the man who would later be his victim. It also appears that Wang was targeting two other doctors he held responsible for his firing.

Ironically, Wang filed a lawsuit after he was fired claiming that he was “unfairly labeled excitable, emotional and unable to control his anger.”

[Yale Daily News: Postdoc killed outside Branford, Conn., home; suspect charged]
[NY Times: Doctor Is Charged With Murder of His Ex-Supervisor]
[Economic Times: Delhi doctor at Yale shot dead by Chinese colleague]

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M.I.A.’s “Born Free” Vid: Is Ginger-Hate The New Black?

Have you seen M.I.A.’s much talked-about “Born Free” video yet?

It’s violent! It’s NSFW! It’s been censored by YouTube! It’s about GENOCIDE, people!

It’s also, frankly, a little silly.

The video depicts an American police state in which Gingers are rounded up and brutally exterminated, and by “brutally” I mean, in that beautiful cinematic way–replete with slow motion effects, big budget explosions, and a pastel desert sky–that filmmakers tend to favor, paradoxically, when they’re supposed to be showing you that killing is anything but beautiful.

And, YES, it’s a metaphor, but it’s also–as people have already pointed out–a South Park episode from 2005. A very funny South Park episode that made me giggle. Is that the desired effect of “Born Free,” to make people giggle at genocide? No? Then pick a better metaphor. Besides, Ginger-Hate is too trendy for M.I.A., it’s too cute.

But where this video really goes awry is with the song itself. “Born Free” sounds a whole lot like 9 minutes of you sitting on your bedroom floor, playing your records backwards. In other words, it’s kinda terrible. Especially for someone like M.I.A., who’s genius at delivering a message with a mean hook (see: “Paper Planes”).

About her music, M.I.A. has been quoted in the past as saying:

“Nobody wants to be dancing to political songs. Every bit of music out there that’s making it into the mainstream is really about nothing. I wanted to see if I could write songs about something important and make it sound like nothing. And it kind of worked.”

And therein lies the problem: “Born Free” sounds like nothing alright…but can you dance to it?

[miauk.com]

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