Tiger Woods returns to golf next week at the Masters golf tournament in Augusta, GA, which is all a lot of people–myself included–have wanted since news of his multiple extramarital affairs surfaced. Golf may be boring, but nothing’s more boring than seeing Tiger’s “Hey Sexy, What Are You Wearing?” text messages dominate the headlines and knowing the dull minutiae of his life. I mean, porn mistresses and turkey club sandwiches? Could you be more pedestrian?!
There’s only one problem with Tiger’s return, and that’s how the media’s predicting things will go. Not with his golf swing, mind you, but with his
soon-to-be-ex wife, Elin.
Hmm. I dunno. Shouldn’t the question be: “Should Elin run away to Sweden with the children?”
Or: “Should Elin run away with all of Tiger’s money?”
Or how about: “Should Elin CUT HIS FUCKING DICK OFF? (POLL)”
[People: POLL: Should Elin Nordegren Go to the Masters with Tiger Woods]
[Kansas City Star: Tiger Woods' wife skipping the Masters? (Poll)]
[USA Today: Eye-Opener: Should Tiger's wife go to The Masters]
Filed under: Blasians, Cheaters, Elin Nordegren, Golf, Stand by Your Man, Tammy Wynette, The Masters Golf Tournament, This is Bullshit, Tiger Woods, Tiger Woods Affair, Tiger Woods Affairs, Tiger Woods Marriage, Tiger Woods Returns, Tiger Woods Sex Scandals, Who Knew Golf Could Get You Laid?
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