Conveyor Belt Of Love May Be The Greatest Awful Show Of All Time

January 7th, 2010 | 6 comments | Posted by Diana

Network television’s worst inside joke-turned-joke-turned-running joke-turned-joke pitch-turned pitch treatment-turned-idea going up the chain-turned-pilot order-turned-IDIOTIC DRIVEL THAT SOMEHOW SAW NETWORK AIRTIME ON ABC AND RESULTED IN A SERIES ORDER aired this week, and I missed it. Oh, darn.

Here’s the concept: Five single ladies choose from thirty single guys in a conveyor belt white elephant party. That is all you need to know.

Fortunately for me, my reality crap aficionado pals at Homo Shame alerted me as soon as they read about it, and I found the entire episode on Hulu.

That’s right, I watched it. And so can you:

Keep your eyes on Keiko during this episode. She’s bratty, opinionated, languid, not terribly bright and too pretty for her own good–also the first to proclaim disinterest in the “Filipino Criss Angel” on the belt, which may make you mad until you realize he sucks.

Keiko is a player-lover who chooses a hard body over intellect, disses the hot engineer with the 5 o’clock shadow in favor of an oily Speedo-wearer with a chihuahua, loves screwing, and in general gives this show the credit and seriousness it deserves–next to none. All in all, she’s the best part of the show (“Show” being an incredibly generous term, by the way).

In my wildest dreams, I cannot imagine this show functioning as an actual series, which means it’ll be a giant hit. Guess I’ll go set my DV-R.

[Hulu: Conveyor Belt Of Love]

Thanks, jRu!

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6 Responses to “Conveyor Belt Of Love May Be The Greatest Awful Show Of All Time”

  1. alperryman says:

    My favorite part of the whole show was when Keiko told the kid with red shoes that he dressed too flashy for her. He shot back with something along the lines of, “but you’re a flashy dresser” and she rolled her head and said, “Excuse me? This is elegant.”

    HA!

    Also, WEIRDEST DATE EVER. “Let’s let the dogs play with each other.” (shoves dog at guy’s dog) “Look,they like each other!”

  2. Julie says:

    Thank you SO MUCH for introducing me to this show, and by proxy, Keiko. She needs her own series. And I didn’t say this out loud, but I kinda teared up a bit when Angelique and the Chris Farley impersonator were on their date. It was cute.

  3. J-Mah says:

    Damn you Hulu and your anti Canadian ways!

    Of course this mean I don’t have to watch it. Yay for my eyes!

  4. nohe812 says:

    Mad props to Diana and fellow readers for sitting through this show. I couldn’t make it past two minutes.

  5. Friggles says:

    Just recruit a bunch of retards and a doppleganger of my ex-girlfriend,(Keiko.)and you too can have your own third tier reality show.

  6. chongerbadonger says:

    I guess the people at homoshame had it right bc apparently there is a gay porn star, from randyblue, on the show already. He is Akoni, the guy from hawaii who came out and was the first to get picked.
    http://www.realityblurred.com/realitytv/archives/abc/2009_Dec_13_conveyor_porn

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