We Get It Already, Blasians Can’t Drive Escalades

December 2nd, 2009 | 8 comments | Posted by Diana

As Gawker aptly pointed out yesterday, nearly every hack comedian in America managed a take on this setup: “Blasian Tiger Woods crashes his Escalade.”

Ha.



There are many versions, but the joke goes something like this:

Tiger Woods crashed his Escalade yesterday!
Well you know, he’s Black and Asian [pause for yuks].
And of course… the Black part of him bought the Cadillac [insert ghetto grin] and the Asian part of him was driving [insert buck teef]!

Click here for the sampler flight of punchlines.

Surprisingly, though, not one comedian seemed to find a way to make the “joke” funny. ZzZZZzzZzzZZZzZzzzzzZzzzz.

[via Gawker]

Thanks, Jasmine and Colin!

Filed under: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

8 Responses to “We Get It Already, Blasians Can’t Drive Escalades”

  1. BlasianBytch says:

    Sadly as a blasian that can’t drive these jokes are nothing new to me. I don’t think that people were concentrated on his bad driving and more on his bad marriage…

  2. Cindy says:

    Ick! Ick! Ick!

  3. PD says:

    I caught Lopez making a tired Indians-drive-cabs joke about the Prime Minister of India last week. The audience ate that one up too. Yuk, yuk.

    And Wanda Sykes always does Asian jokes. I remember a couple of years ago she was a guest on The Daily Show, of all places, and began her interview talking about how uptight Chinese people are. For like, no reason, it was just really on her mind.

    You notice that a lot with comedians who are in some way minorities themselves, be it by race or gender. To distract from their own “otherness” as a minority, they focus the audience on beating up on ANOTHER minority instead. That minority is often Asians, who are the most disadvantaged and poorly represented in terms of popular culture.

    I guess that’s why Sykes, as a black comic, and as a lesbian, and as an unfunny b*tch, goes for the Asian jokes so much.

  4. prometheus says:

    does anyone actually care what the national enquirer prints on their paper? was there ever a point in the history of the universe that they had a shred of credibility?

  5. Friggles says:

    C’mon, George Lopez? That dude is trying so hard to be edgy after years of sitcom banality. Really, the only funny Mexican comic is the bee man on Telemundo and I don’t even know what he’s talkin’ about.

  6. Cindy says:

    @prometheus I had a biology professor who said he wished there was a shoot outside of every grocery store. Anyone who exited carrying a National Enquirer would be sucked down the shoot and lost forever. He then triumphantly yelled, “Now THAT’s natural selection!”

  7. J-Mah says:

    *Face Palm*

  8. madison010101 says:

    AS AN ASIAN AMERICAN MAN,I AM SO FUCKING SICK OF THESE RACIST STEREOTYPE ABOUT ASIANS! WE TOO CAN DRIVE; THE JOKE ITSELF IS NOT EVEN FUNNY TO START WITH. TO SAY THAT ASIANS CAN’T DRIVE IS LIKE SAYING…
    oh fuck!!! I just crash my SUV while typing this on my blackberry -_-

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.

karatekid

Yo, Is This Racist? Podcast f/t DISGRASIAN Day 5: Everybody Was Kung Fu Fighting

April 26th, 2013 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

Not all martials arts movies look same.

The cast of HBO's 'Girls'

Yo, Is This Racist? Podcast f/t DISGRASIAN Day 4: Was The HBO ‘Girls’ Controversy About Racism Or Sexism?

April 25th, 2013 | 2 comments | Posted by Jen

Girl talk.

Peter-Beste9

Yo, Is This Racist? Podcast f/t DISGRASIAN Day 3, aka Hump Day: What To Do When Your Friend Likes Racist Music

April 24th, 2013 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

Should you dump a friend who likes racist stuff?

office space

Yo, Is This Racist? Podcast f/t DISGRASIAN Day 2: Workplace Segregation + A Little History Lesson

April 23rd, 2013 | 2 comments | Posted by Jen

Don’t hate, integrate.

I was trying to give Andrew bunny ears, but I ended up throwing an Asian peace sign instead. Yo, I think that's racist.

Yo, Is This Racist? Podcast f/t DISGRASIAN Day 1: Natural Hair

April 22nd, 2013 | 1 comment | Posted by Jen

Wherein we take all of your racist questions. (Some of them, anyway.)

Photo by Lee-Jin Man/AP

Creepy Photo Of S. Korean Soldier Wielding Machine Gun In Front Of Laughing Children Kinda Sums Up Where We Are At This Juncture

April 18th, 2013 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

Peace.

2013-03-29-01-01

If North Korea Attacks Us, I Have Just One Favor To Ask God

April 5th, 2013 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

North Korea is so hot right now.

Screen Shot 2013-02-28 at 11.22.12 AM

Michelle Malkin Desperately Wants To Be Michelle Obama

February 28th, 2013 | 2 comments | Posted by Jen

Wannabe.

Screen Shot 2012-12-05 at 2.52.57 PM

Penn State Sorority Girls Will Work For Weed & Beer

December 5th, 2012 | 6 comments | Posted by Jen

Viva racism!

bfbutt

Intern Jasmine’s Links Of The Daysian: The Ass Pants & Butt-Rubbing Edition

November 30th, 2012 | 1 comment | Posted by jasmine

We here at DISGRASIAN™ are going to use our buying power to buy as many Samsung butt-rubbed phones as we can.

ama_psy_and_hammer_this_one_0

Things I Thought I’d Never See: A Dude Rapping In Korean At The American Music Awards

November 19th, 2012 | 3 comments | Posted by Jen

Gangnam Time? Hammer Style?

dj-twinkie2-blog480

RIP Twinkies, RIP Name Asians Like To Call Other Asians Who Are Less Asian Than They Are

November 16th, 2012 | 5 comments | Posted by Jen

How are we going to insult one another now?!