On Race Relasians

May 7th, 2009 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

Two-thirds of Americans think race relations are good post-election, according to a recent NY Times/CBS News survey. The Times followed up over the weekend with a story that corroborated those findings, interviewing dozens of people in seven states on the subject. As usual, the interviewees on the vast subject of race relations were limited to either black or white, although Asians were brought into the dialogue by this one fellow:

“I didn’t vote for Obama,” said Chris Miller, 46, a boat builder in Johnstown, N.Y., who is white. “But just what I saw during the campaign — you had people, white, black, yellow, green, gray, every race and nationality out there together supporting that man. That right there showed me, hey, things are changing, things are better here. I had never seen anything to that extent.”


But is it too much inclusiveness? What I mean specifically is…who the hell are these green people? (Don’t even get me started on “grays,” I think they’re about as real as centaurs.) What contributions have greens made to this country that suddenly they get to be in discussions about race, too? Our people have been here for over 150 years…can greens say the same? Did they build our railroads and do our laundry? Did they perfect take-out cuisine? Did they set new standards of excellence in science and academia and figure skating? People, you know, accuse Asians of “keeping to themselves,” but have you ever seen a green person do anything positive in your community? For that matter, have you ever even seen a green person?!

Okay, I guess some do exist, but I’ve still never seen them at church or a Little League game

Y’all, this is some bullshit. I’m glad Asians are beginning to be included in the dialogue–and I credit Obama for that–but we have waited and worked and protested and agitated to be here. I don’t think you can say the same for green people. If you ask me, they’ve been a little bit apathetic and, frankly, lazy about their place in this society. I know that sounds racist. Maybe it is. In which case, race relations probably aren’t so swell after all. Harumph.


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