Obama in the Oval Office, after giving him a tour of the White House
BUSH: Pretty cool digs, eh, Obamarama?
OBAMA: The best in the world, Mr. President. I’m looking forward to settling in.
BUSH: [Surveying the room] I can’t get over the fact that it doesn’t really feel like an oval.
BUSH: And y’know, I’m not looking forward to packing up all of my crap, y’know what I mean? Eight years is a long time. I’m like, tired. I hate wrapping stuff and putting it in boxes. Laura always ends up doing that kinda stuff for me. I just tell her I’m busy or I’m on the phone with some world leader or something. And if that doesn’t work I just threaten that I’ll drink again, he he. Works every time!
OBAMA: I’m sure it’s a pretty daunting task, Mr. President. Before we move forward, I think it would be a good idea to first talk about expediting the economic stimulus package.
BUSH: Oh, Borat, you know I can’t say the words “stimulus” and “package” in the same sentence without chuckling a little. Chuckling a lot, he he… “package!” [chuckles]
OBAMA: It’s important to take action on it now, and not just wait until I take office. That’s still two months away. And you’re the President right now.
BUSH: Oh, I can piss away a couple of months, no problem. Hell, Orama, if I had been running in this election I bet they’d still be counting ballots in January.
OBAMA: I’m not sure that’s the best way to look at it, Mr. President.
BUSH: Call me Georgie. I’ll call you Barry. Or… Osama! [chuckles]
OBAMA: I’d rather not.
BUSH: You’d rather what?
OBAMA: Mr. President, let’s talk about housing. Americans are losing their homes.
BUSH: I know, O Ban! I am one of those Americans! You’re comin’ in here and takin’ over the place with some weird hyper-anesthesia dog!
OBAMA: Mr. President, if I could just get you to focus…
BUSH: Have you wondered where exactly a squid’s face is? Those crazy-ass things don’t make a lick o’ sense to me. Kinda like Koreans.
OBAMA: No, Mr. President, I haven’t wondered much about that.
BUSH: Do you listen to Foreigner at all?
OBAMA: I have a very diverse playlist.
BUSH: Cool man, cool. So what’s it like being a Muslim?
OBAMA: [Sighs] Somebody, anybody, please just take the picture.
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.