Why? Because we’d like to stay friends 4 eva. But since we’re both Asian, we’re both REALLY good at games. And we REALLY like winning. We need to win. We always win.
If we play against each other, one of us doesn’t win. This is simply unacceptable. Frienship-killing, even. So we play together and beat all of the other losers out there, keeping both our galpalship and our desire to win firmly intact.
Winning, however, must be done fairly and squarely to matter so much. We’ll cut you out if you cheat to get a Scrabble bingo, or recruit a professional to help you face off with us on Rock Band. We have a hard time looking at the New England Pats with respect after they got so publicly busted for videotaping their opponents’ signs (guess Super Bowl karma’s a bitch, eh?). We shake our heads at the memorable disgrace of the game-throwing Black Sox, the juiced up home runs of Barry Bonds, the pathetic game betting of Pete Rose.
What’s the point of winning if everyone isn’t playing it straight and doing their best? We don’t think those wins are worth shit. They’re not good for anybody involved.
So we are pretty much horrified that in order to win (important), a South Korean badminton team (cool) employed a strategy to throw their most recent game (wack) against England in order to guarantee themselves an easier track to the Badminton World Federation final.
We know winning is everything, but there’s gotta be a more noble way to do it.
Everybody deserves better.
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