Kid Nasian: A Gold Star Is Born

December 11th, 2007 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

I suppose it’s sorta pervy to admit that I have a crush on Alex, the half-Asian nine year-old with one tooth from Kid Nation, possibly the worst reality show of all time (there’s no explanation as to why I keep watching, except that I experience some kind of catharsis at the end of every episode, when I wind up crying along with all the child contestants at those wretched town hall meetings).

But I love everything about Alex. Like the tooth. And those photochromic glasses he wears that switch from dark to clear depending on the outside light, a style of eyewear I thought had fallen into complete obsolescence. And that he knows how to identify a femur bone, as he did last episode when he stumbled upon a cow carcass.

Also during that episode, not-so-bright Council Leader Greg called Alex “one of the smartest persons” in the fake town of Bonanza City and awarded the one-toothed wonder the $20,000 gold star prize. Alex squealed with delight and described the award as “a paradox.” Then he had to explain to the other little dummies what that meant. “A paradox…is where something is and yet not is at the same time,” he said.

In ten years, this little dude will be a total catch and probably have come up with a renewable energy plan to save the planet (Al Gore is his hero). And even though all of his teeth will have grown in by then, I imagine he won’t be any less adorable.

Source

Filed under: , , , , ,

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.

karatekid

Yo, Is This Racist? Podcast f/t DISGRASIAN Day 5: Everybody Was Kung Fu Fighting

April 26th, 2013 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

Not all martials arts movies look same.

The cast of HBO's 'Girls'

Yo, Is This Racist? Podcast f/t DISGRASIAN Day 4: Was The HBO ‘Girls’ Controversy About Racism Or Sexism?

April 25th, 2013 | 2 comments | Posted by Jen

Girl talk.

Peter-Beste9

Yo, Is This Racist? Podcast f/t DISGRASIAN Day 3, aka Hump Day: What To Do When Your Friend Likes Racist Music

April 24th, 2013 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

Should you dump a friend who likes racist stuff?

office space

Yo, Is This Racist? Podcast f/t DISGRASIAN Day 2: Workplace Segregation + A Little History Lesson

April 23rd, 2013 | 2 comments | Posted by Jen

Don’t hate, integrate.

I was trying to give Andrew bunny ears, but I ended up throwing an Asian peace sign instead. Yo, I think that's racist.

Yo, Is This Racist? Podcast f/t DISGRASIAN Day 1: Natural Hair

April 22nd, 2013 | 1 comment | Posted by Jen

Wherein we take all of your racist questions. (Some of them, anyway.)

Photo by Lee-Jin Man/AP

Creepy Photo Of S. Korean Soldier Wielding Machine Gun In Front Of Laughing Children Kinda Sums Up Where We Are At This Juncture

April 18th, 2013 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

Peace.

2013-03-29-01-01

If North Korea Attacks Us, I Have Just One Favor To Ask God

April 5th, 2013 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

North Korea is so hot right now.

Screen Shot 2013-02-28 at 11.22.12 AM

Michelle Malkin Desperately Wants To Be Michelle Obama

February 28th, 2013 | 2 comments | Posted by Jen

Wannabe.

Screen Shot 2012-12-05 at 2.52.57 PM

Penn State Sorority Girls Will Work For Weed & Beer

December 5th, 2012 | 6 comments | Posted by Jen

Viva racism!

bfbutt

Intern Jasmine’s Links Of The Daysian: The Ass Pants & Butt-Rubbing Edition

November 30th, 2012 | 1 comment | Posted by jasmine

We here at DISGRASIAN™ are going to use our buying power to buy as many Samsung butt-rubbed phones as we can.

ama_psy_and_hammer_this_one_0

Things I Thought I’d Never See: A Dude Rapping In Korean At The American Music Awards

November 19th, 2012 | 3 comments | Posted by Jen

Gangnam Time? Hammer Style?

dj-twinkie2-blog480

RIP Twinkies, RIP Name Asians Like To Call Other Asians Who Are Less Asian Than They Are

November 16th, 2012 | 5 comments | Posted by Jen

How are we going to insult one another now?!