When Adopted Worlds Collide

August 20th, 2007 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen
Brad Pitt holding his children Zahara and Pax Thien on the shores of Lake Michigan

ZAHARA: Psst…Pax.

PAX: What, what? I didn’t do nothin’.

ZAHARA: I think you’re too old to be carried.

PAX: But we’re going on a boat ride. And I’m scared of boats. I don’t even like to look at them, they make me woozy.

ZAHARA: Why do you always look like you just pissed yourself? Smile for the paps, for chrissakes, we’ve been over this 1200 times. Do you want to be the forgotten child? Mom thinks I’m the “biggest personality in the house,” not to mention “the funniest person” she’s ever met. Mad is totally kicking your ass in the which-adopted-Asian-son-is-cuter competition. And Shiloh, well…she’s white. She’s always gonna catch a break. Get it?

PAX: I grew up in an orphanage. My life was rough.

ZAHARA: Take a fucking number. Look at our Dad, fool.

PAX: I don’t know what that means.

ZAHARA: Brad Pitt is your FREAKIN’ father! It means you’re the luckiest little bastard on earth!

PAX: Why are you always picking on me? You’re going to make me cry.

ZAHARA: (simpering) “Why are you always picking on me?” Stop being a pussy, man. It’s embarrassing.


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