HPuhhhh-leeze

August 31st, 2007 | 0 comments | Posted by Diana

Afternoon chat at DISGRASIAN HQ:

JEN: Hi Diana!

DIANA: Hey Jen!

JEN: How are you? Cute dress.

DIANA: Thank you. Lovely shoes. Are they A.P.C.?

JEN: No, Loeffler Randall. I love a nude flat.

DIANA: Who doesn’t?

[They relax with their laptops, reading the Times and various blogs]

DIANA (cont’d): Ugh, Gwen Stefani.

JEN: Dude, I’m almost fucking over talking about Gwen Stefani. She bores the bejeezus out of me.

DIANA: Yeah–It’s like she sucks, she’s derivative, she’s annoying… but I wouldn’t even waste the energy hating her if she wasn’t still enslaving those poor Harajuku Girls.

JEN: She won’t listen. She’s up inside her own asshole. She’s so deeply entrenched in her filthy brand of exploitasian. She looks like a man.

DIANA: She bores me. And I’m from Orange County.

JEN: I wouldn’t say that too loud.

DIANA: I represent!

[They continue to work quietly on their laptops.]

JEN: Oh lawd.

DIANA: Hmm?

JEN: I just clicked on this HP ad.

DIANA: You clicked on a computer company link?

JEN: Accident.

DIANA: Oh.

JEN: You won’t believe this site. It’s ill.

DIANA: What is it?

JEN: It’s this awful, cheesy promotional thing called “Gwen Stefani For You” where you make a bunch of idiotic Gwen-themed crap and print it out on your HP printer.

[Jen's eyes narrow as she gazes at...]


JEN (cont’d): Ugh. Gross. Look.

[Diana leans over and clicks on the first link...]


DIANA: Jeezus!

[She clicks back and moves on to...]


DIANA: I might throw up. She doesn’t stop.

JEN: Who buys into this shit?

DIANA: Bajillions of people.

JEN: [Sighs loudly]

DIANA: Still bored?

JEN: Yeah, still bored.

[They continue to work on their laptops.]

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