Yao: Gather around, children, and let me tell you a story.
Scottie: (to photographer) I’m in the shot, right? Okay, good.
Yao: There once was a very tall boy who lived in a very small Chinese village.
Scottie: Did I mention that I played with Michael Jordan?
Yao: Anywho, all this boy dreamed of doing was playing basketball–
Scottie: So he did. And his name was Scottie. Scottie Pippen.
Yao: Uh-huh. Actually the boy’s name was–
Scottie: Scottie Pippen became one of the greatest basketball players of all time. Some teams even said that they would rather have a Scottie than a Michael.
Yao: Dude. You said that.
Scottie: Oh. I did? Right. (beat) Do you think this red kerchief makes me look gay?
Yao: (to photographer) Just take the picture so we can tell these poor children a story and bring a little joy into their lives.
Scottie: Children? Oh, yes, there are children here. Hey kids! Wanna see Scottie Pippen’s 6 Championship rings? You can look but don’t touch.
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