When Worlds Collide

May 15th, 2007 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

DISGRASIAN Hall-of-Shamer Gwen Stefani received a surprise present from a Mystery Fan on Mother’s Day.


Gwen: Do I know you?

Mystery Fan: Oh my god. Gwen Stefani! It’s really you! I’m such a huge fan.

Gwen: Uh-huh.

Mystery Fan: Sorry. Where are my manners? I’m Jen. My friend Diana and I have a blog, and we write about you all the time.

Gwen: That’s cool. I was about to take my son out for a walk, so–

Mystery Fan: Happy Mother’s Day! I just wanted to give you this, and then I’ll leave you alone.

Gwen: Thanks. (takes bouquet and sniffs) Eww…Arrgh..Gag…Ughhh…Barf…Achhh!!!

Mystery Fan: Don’t you like the poo-quet? It’s all the rage in Harajuku.

Gwen: (poo on face) What the fuck? I’m going to slap a restraining order on your ass!

Mystery Fan: Oh yeah? Well we’re slapping an Emancipasian order on your ass. Which is fat. And you’ve got poo on your face, beyotch!

Sound of sirens. The police roll up.

Cop: Ms. Stefani, is this the intruder?

Gwen: Yeesssss! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

The cops lead the Mystery Fan away in handcuffs.

Mystery Fan: Emancipasian Now! Free the Harajuku Girls!


Gwen: I justh thwallow shith! Ith in my moufth! Helf may! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!

Mystery Fan: What do we want? FREEDOM! When do want it? NOW!

Source
Source

Filed under: , , , , , ,

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post a comment.

karatekid

Yo, Is This Racist? Podcast f/t DISGRASIAN Day 5: Everybody Was Kung Fu Fighting

April 26th, 2013 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

Not all martials arts movies look same.

The cast of HBO's 'Girls'

Yo, Is This Racist? Podcast f/t DISGRASIAN Day 4: Was The HBO ‘Girls’ Controversy About Racism Or Sexism?

April 25th, 2013 | 2 comments | Posted by Jen

Girl talk.

Peter-Beste9

Yo, Is This Racist? Podcast f/t DISGRASIAN Day 3, aka Hump Day: What To Do When Your Friend Likes Racist Music

April 24th, 2013 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

Should you dump a friend who likes racist stuff?

office space

Yo, Is This Racist? Podcast f/t DISGRASIAN Day 2: Workplace Segregation + A Little History Lesson

April 23rd, 2013 | 2 comments | Posted by Jen

Don’t hate, integrate.

I was trying to give Andrew bunny ears, but I ended up throwing an Asian peace sign instead. Yo, I think that's racist.

Yo, Is This Racist? Podcast f/t DISGRASIAN Day 1: Natural Hair

April 22nd, 2013 | 1 comment | Posted by Jen

Wherein we take all of your racist questions. (Some of them, anyway.)

Photo by Lee-Jin Man/AP

Creepy Photo Of S. Korean Soldier Wielding Machine Gun In Front Of Laughing Children Kinda Sums Up Where We Are At This Juncture

April 18th, 2013 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

Peace.

2013-03-29-01-01

If North Korea Attacks Us, I Have Just One Favor To Ask God

April 5th, 2013 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

North Korea is so hot right now.

Screen Shot 2013-02-28 at 11.22.12 AM

Michelle Malkin Desperately Wants To Be Michelle Obama

February 28th, 2013 | 2 comments | Posted by Jen

Wannabe.

Screen Shot 2012-12-05 at 2.52.57 PM

Penn State Sorority Girls Will Work For Weed & Beer

December 5th, 2012 | 6 comments | Posted by Jen

Viva racism!

bfbutt

Intern Jasmine’s Links Of The Daysian: The Ass Pants & Butt-Rubbing Edition

November 30th, 2012 | 1 comment | Posted by jasmine

We here at DISGRASIAN™ are going to use our buying power to buy as many Samsung butt-rubbed phones as we can.

ama_psy_and_hammer_this_one_0

Things I Thought I’d Never See: A Dude Rapping In Korean At The American Music Awards

November 19th, 2012 | 3 comments | Posted by Jen

Gangnam Time? Hammer Style?

dj-twinkie2-blog480

RIP Twinkies, RIP Name Asians Like To Call Other Asians Who Are Less Asian Than They Are

November 16th, 2012 | 5 comments | Posted by Jen

How are we going to insult one another now?!