The Electric New Paper, a Singaporean news outlet (don’t ask where their “s” went), reported today that Rong Zhi Qiang, a Hong Kong 17 year-old, was busted for mixing three nails into his meal at a Yoshinoya in an attempt to scam the Japanese fast-food chain for compensation. Zhi Qiang SWALLOWED ONE 3 CM NAIL along with his crab roe and salmon rice dish to make it look real. This was not the teen’s first brush with the law. “He has been previously found guilty of stealing a handphone and causing hurt,” the new paper revealed.
This story begs for multiple reads. Trust me. Allow me to walk you through my reactions as I savored its delicious bits over and over.
First Read: LOL.
Second Read: SO RONG.
Third Read: Swallowing a 3 cm nail without f-ing up his internal organs? THIS KID HAS A GIFT.
Fourth Read: “The swallowed nail remained inside him for six days till it was passed out on Wednesday in a hospital.” POOR NURSES.
Fifth Read: Crab roe and salmon at Yoshinoya? FOOD POISONING ALERT.
Final Read: “The Yoshinoya chain issued a statement three days after the incident saying that the likelihood of nails being mixed with the dish is very small.”
I BEG TO DIFFER.
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