L.A.M.B. Li-Trally Coming Apart at the Seams

April 3rd, 2007 | 0 comments | Posted by Jen

fashionweekdaily.com reported yesterday that Gwen Stefani and L.A.M.B. head designer Zaldy Goco, the Filipino Olivier Theyskens, have parted ways.

Gwen: So, like, here’s the deal, Imelda.

Zaldy: Er, it’s Zaldy.

Gwen: Hmm. Anyway, Imelda, it’s just, how do I put this? I think it looks bad for me to have one of my “backup dancers” be the designer of L.A.M.B., you know what I’m saying?

Zaldy: I, um, never was a dancer for you. I’m your designer.

Gwen: What?!? Is this some kind of joke, Mikaka? April Fool’s is over, Slave.

Zaldy: No, really, I was the designer of L.A.M.B. for the last three years.

Gwen: As If! I am the designer of my own clothing line, that’s why they call it MY clothing line. Do you think anyone is going to believe that a two-bit Japanese tramp like you designed Gwen Stefani’s dope shit?

Zaldy: Um. Er. I’m Filipino. My name is Zaldy.

Gwen: Your name is whatever I say it is, Cuntard! How dare you be insubordinate. Forty lashes for you…Natsumi!

Zaldy: I think I should go now. (whips out cell phone, dials) Hello, Amnesty International?

Gwen: You can’t leave, Slave! I own you!


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